Inside
by Isabella.Uley
Summary: "Is there something you need, Professor?" I asked him stupidly. "Nothing just…" he said awkwardly. "Goodnight, Miss Granger," he smiled, opening his eyes to look down at me. "Goodnight," I nodded once, but was barley able to make half a turn away before his arms were wrapped around me, and his lips on mine. The rest of the Summer passed in silence.
1. Prologue: Summer Begins and My Life Ends

**Inside**

Prologue: Summer Begins and My Life Ends

**Hermione's POV**

"Mum, I don't see what the issue is! It's not like I haven't stayed with Ron and his family before! And besides, his parents love having me; they love me it won't be an issue! And Ginny is one of my best friends along with Ron being mine, and Fred and George are-"

"Hermione," She cut me off again. "We have already discussed this; you can not stay with Ron and his family this summer; not even visit! I am sorry, but it would make things terribly awkward for your Father and me. No, I am sorry, I have given you my answer, and it is no."

"Mum, how many times must _I _tell _you_ it will be incredibly awkward for _me_ and unpleasant and uncomfortable and just down right sickening to have to stay in a house, _my_ house, with him all summer! He must be able to go somewhere else! He just has to! Please!"

"Hermione, love, it is a matter that is out of your Father's and my hands! We aren't a witch and wizard like you or the people you go to school with!" She declared. "And besides, when Mr. Dumbledore wrote us he said that you seemed somewhat reluctant but willing to have him stay here, so if this is anybody's fault my dear it's yours."

"Just because his bloody house burnt down doesn't mean he's homeless. A lot of the other teachers stay at the school in the summer, and before now I thought he did. So why can't he just stay there this one time?" I mumbled to myself.

"Because, my pet, sometimes teachers also get tired of being there all year." My Mother answered me with an irritated and disgustingly pleasant smile on her face as she stood back up with a full laundry basket in her arms. "Now, be a dear and take these upstairs to my room? Our guest will be arriving soon with your Father and we don't want a messy house to cloud his first impression on us."

"No," I agreed sarcastically while taking the basket from her and pulling it harshly into my chest. "We wouldn't want poor Professor Snape to think badly of us."

"No we would not." Mum agreed as I bounded up the stairs two at a time with my heart hammering against my ribcage.

I grabbed the handle and kicked open the door to my parent's room and dropped the laundry basket and let it fall carelessly onto their perfectly made bed before turning back around and slamming the door shut behind me. My room wasn't far down the hall from theirs and I threw myself onto my bed face first and grunted into my pillow while kicking my bare feet childishly.

"Why am I so stupid?" I asked my inanimate pillow. "Why did I have to say yes? And why did he have to ask me? And why'd it have to be him? Of all the teacher's Snape… Bloody rude, mean, heartless, cold Snape. My life is over! I am so incredibly upset… why must I be so nice and selfless all the time?"

"Hermione darling!" My Mum called from downstairs a few minutes later, after hearing the life shattering sound of the front door closing. "Will you come down here please and introduce us properly to your teacher?"

"Fuck – My – Life."

TBC


	2. Stuck With Snape

**Inside**

Chapter One: Stuck With Snape

**Hermione's POV**

"Hermione love, will you pass the salt?" Dad asked with a smile across his full lips, acting as if nothing was different.

"Yeah," I answered while lifting it from the table and placing it in his open hand. "I actually had a question, Dad. I was wondering if I could be excused early tonight. I promised Ron I'd call him, and Harry, if his Aunt and Uncle will allow it, that is." I added softly while looking down at my lap.

"Oh!" My Mum said unexpectedly before dabbing at her lips with a folded cloth. "That reminds me! I forgot to tell you earlier Hermione, Viktor called."

"What?" I asked her, "Really? When?"

"It was just before your Father and Severus arrived, you were in your room."

"Why didn't you tell me?" I demanded. "Mum, it's nearly impossible to get a hold of him by phone!"

"Well, I am sorry dear but it looked like you needed a few moments to yourself so I told him you'd call him back."

"That was hours ago, he's probably asleep by now." I moped while folding my arms depressed across my stomach and looking down to the floor. "I hardly ever get to hear his voice anymore…" I trailed off as my Dad cleared his throat and took a small drink of his deep red wine.

"Why don't you go on upstairs and try to give him a call?" He suggested. "And after that try telephoning Ron and Harry, I'm sure that'll cheer you up if Viktor can't talk. And besides, it'll give us and Severus time to get to know one another. If," he added suddenly. "-that's alright with you Severus? I know it may be a little awkward with us and not Hermione, as you two know each other."

"No." Snape said. "Not at all, she can do what she likes, as I am sure I pester her too much during the school year as is. I know this is difficult for her, I can't imagine how I would have felt if I had to temporarily live with one of my teachers when I was her age."

"Oh not necessarily," My Mother put in, "I quite liked some of my teachers, I would have had fun with some of them in the summer, I'd imagine."

"That's very nice mother." I said irritably. "My I be excused?"

"Yes, of course you can." My Father nodded and I stood up.

"Night Mum, night Dad." I told them, turning away from them all.

"Eh-hem." My Mother added.

"Good night, _Professor Snape_." I said with uncomfortable shivers going down my spine. "See you all in the morning."

"Good night love." Mum said.

"Good night pet." Dad said.

"Good night, Miss Granger." Professor Snape said, with a what sounded like forced smile across his lips.

* * *

"Come on Viktor," I said, belly down on my bed and phone pressed firmly against my ear with my fingernails squeezed between my teeth. "Please pick up, please. Please, please, plea-"

"Hello, you haff reached Viktor. I am sorry I can not take your call, leafe a message, I vill get back to you."

"Viktor, it's Hermione, I'm sorry I didn't call sooner my Mum didn't even tell me you'd called until just a few minutes ago. Something terrible has happened, but don't worry I'm alright." I quickly added. "Please, call me back. I really need you; I hope to talk to you soon. Bye."

I quickly hung up the phone and began immediately dialing again, this time, Ron.

"Hello?" A familiar voice answered.

"Harry!" I shouted. "Oh, Harry! I am so glad to hear your voice! It's the most awful, terrible thing in the world!"

"Hermione?" He asked. "What is it, and don't start with me, it can't be worse than the Dursley's."

"Snape." I told him. "Professor Snape is at my house right now! Downstairs! With my parents… he'll be here all summer." I whined.

"Okay, clearly I've been corrected." He huffed. "Hermione, Snape, what? What's going on why- what? Yeah, Snape, there, at her house, all summer- WHAT?"

"Harry!" I whined again as he and Ron began conversing back and forth.

"What?" He asked. "Yeah, uh, sorry, filling in Ron. Now tell me what's going on! Why is Snape there?"

"It's a long story…"

"Well we've got loads of time Hermione!" He shouted. "What happened?"

"It was… so… stupid!" I cried. "Dumbledore, at the end of last term asked me to his office. And I being who I am assumed it was to congratulate me for another wonderful year, but, well, obviously I was wrong." I continued filling in the both of them as to what happened, and by the end of my full and lengthy speech, they were all but responsive.

"Please," I added. "Say something. Anything!"

"You said YES!?" Ron shouted into my ear. "Hermione, what the bloody hell is wrong with you!? Out of all the things you would have said no to, you said yes to _this_!?"

"I don't know Ron!" I complained. "I don't! All I know is I did, and he's here, and I can't leave, and he isn't leaving!"

"Well, you've got to!" He demanded. "You can't stay there all summer; he'll drive you mad he will! Come here! Mum loves you! Pack your bags now, we'll come get you!"

"Ron," I moaned. "I…" _How badly I wanted to agree_, "…can't. My Mum won't let me, and I won't be seventeen until September so I've got no choice. Besides, I can't leave them alone with him; I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy! Well, that'll be Malfoy," I added more to myself than Ron, "And he and Snape get along famously, so there'd be no point in it anyways."

"Hermione!" He snapped me back into reality, "I don't care about that! We've got to figure out a way to-"

"Oh I've got to go!" I told him quickly, quietly. "I here footsteps and I think its Snape and I don't want him listening in; the guest bedroom is next to mine. Talk later!" I hung up the phone quickly and clicked off my light just as the bedroom door next to mine clicked shut.

I heard what must have been the bathroom door in the guest room open, and then close and I quivered all over.

This was going to be a very, very long night.

TBC


	3. Conversations

**Inside**

Chapter Two: Conversations

**Hermione's POV**

_3:03…_

_3:10…_

_3:28…_

_4:01…_

_4:10…_

_4:47…_

_5:17…_

"Hermione…

"Hermione…

"We love you, darling."

"Miss Granger

"Miss Granger…"

"Uh… uh… what…" I moaned sleepily while rolling away from the light of my open window. "Ti… red… No. Good dream, finally asleep, pl… ease."

"Miss Granger," Snape's voice rang again in my ears forcing my eyes to shoot open, "Your parent's tried to wake you earlier; it is well past four in the afternoon. They tried to tell you, but left me with the massage to tell, since you were asleep, that they received an emergency telephone call from you Aunt Ariella and headed out immediately. They don't know how long they will be gone, but told me to tell you they love you and to not worry if they are gone a few weeks."

"That's," I said, sitting up and swallowing saliva down my dry throat, "That sounds serious… she lives in Australia. Did they leave a number to reach them at?"

"No, they didn't." He sighed. "But said that they would get a hold of you in the next couple of days."

"I'm sorry to have missed them; I must have really been out." I said, feeling awkward and uncomfortable as I bit my lip softly and looked down at my mattress.

"You were." He agreed. "So, now that I have told you… I will be downstairs reading, minding my own business."

"Okay," I said while running my fingers through my matted hair, "Help yourself to anything if you need it."

I flopped backwards onto my bed and let out a sigh after he closed the door shut behind him.

Alone with Snape for up to a few weeks… well, it isn't the school year. And people are different when they're out of Hogwarts. Or are they? Maybe it's just the awkwardness of seeing people away from school and out of uniform and robes? I might as well try and make things as little awkward as possible, seeing how we _will_ be alone together. Maybe I shouldn't look to him as Snape, but as just another adult… But then can I really do that? I have known the man to be Professor Snape since I was eleven years old, and kids of that age are so impressionable. But I'll be seventeen soon! So maybe with my soon-to-be adult eyes and mind I can see him for who he really is: a person. Because teachers are people, just like students are. And oh boy, am I tried!

* * *

"Hello Mrs. Weasley, is Ron there?" I asked into the phone a half hour later while slowly sipping a mug of morning tea at the kitchen table.

"Hello Hermione dear!" She sang happily, "And actually I think he and Harry went out with Fred, George and Ginny to play a game of Quidditch a few moments ago. But if you like I can go get them?" She asked. "I have been made aware of your, um, situation, and I know Ron already asked it, but if you'd like us to come and-"

"Thank you Mrs. Weasley, but that won't be a possibility," I told her, "My parents have gone out of town for a few weeks; family emergency, so I have got to stay and man the house. However, I would like you to have Harry and Ron call me when they've finished their game, if that won't be a problem?"

"Oh not at all, I'm sure they'll be happy to hear from you. Now take care dear."

"Yes, thank you. Goodbye Mrs. Weasley."

"Bye-bye now."

As I hung up the phone I set it down gently against the kitchen table and looked out the window to the bright yellow and blue sky. I then let out a sigh and decided to check the missed calls list to see who had called since going to bed, with my hopes high that I had not again missed Viktor.

"Damn!" I hissed as I saw his name listed at 1:48pm and 3:07pm.

"Something the matter?" Snape's voice asked from a distance to the side, and I jumped and let out a small squeal, spilling my tea on the table and floor.

"Professor Snape!" I announced with my heart racing, "You startled me."

"So I see. I apologize, would you like some help?" He asked as he strode slowly towards me with a look of what seemed like contained amusement.

"I…" I thought quickly, and deciding to maintain a civil relationship while he stayed in my house, concluded with, "Yes, that'd be nice. I'm still waking up."

"Where are the towels?" He asked as he hovered aimlessly beside the refrigerator.

"They're in the second cupboard beside the sink." I told him, "Yes, just there." I said with a small, pleasant smile on my lips as he opened the appropriate cupboard.

"I know this is weird for both of us, Professor. I can hardly be the student of choice you'd decide to spend a summer with." I said before thinking.

"Oh, I wouldn't necessarily say that, Miss Granger." He said as we bent down in unison to the floor and he handed me a plaid violet and yellow towel. "After all, people are different in school versus out. What you know of me, and what I know of you, is hardly cause to avoid each other completely when we don't have to see each other. We barley know each other to judge like that."

"Yeah," I said stupidly as I began wiping and dabbing at the spilled tea. "So, um, did my parents say anything about what was wrong with Aunt Ariella?"

"No," He told me. "No, I am sorry they did not. They just said it was an emergency and that they didn't want to take you away from your summer holiday, and for you to not worry yourself over it."

"Well how can they possibly expect that of me?" I asked him. "Expect me not to worry? They flew all the way to Australia to see my Aunt Ariella, who we only visit once a year, if that. And they ask me not to worry…" I trailed off. "Sorry, Professor, I'm… sorry." I said more to myself than him.

"Well, Miss Granger, I'm not saying that I know your parents, but I doubt they'd tell you to _not_ worry if it were serious. I mean, don't you think they would have asked you to come if it were _truly_ serious?" He asked. "I'd understand them lying if you were a child, but you're nearly an adult now."

"I know, before I know it I'll be out of school and starting my own life."

"Don't get too ahead of yourself yet Miss Granger; you've still two years left."

"I know, but the first five seem to have flown by."

"Oh, you've no idea." Snape laughed, showing me for the first time that he could laugh, and smile. "Before you know it you'll be my age and reflecting back on your own glory days, or, youth."

"Yeah, Harry, Ron and I have certainly had some of those." I laughed.

"Yes, you certainly have." He said back while taking his now damp towel and folding it unnecessarily in his hands.

"You know, Harry, he's not as bad as you make him out to be." I said cautiously. "He never wanted to be famous, and if he did that would just be sick. I mean, who would want to be famous for having both your parents' dead? And not _just _dead but murdered… Leaving you with not even one single memory of either of them…"

"I know that, Miss Granger." He said with equal calmness, and with that, stood up and left silently.

* * *

"You did _what_!?" Ron bellowed into the phone.

"I, you know, had a conversation with him. And a fairly decent one at that." I told him again as I walked over and laid down comfortably onto my unmade bed. "Really Ron, it wasn't that bad! I think it's just at school he acts the way we're used to."

"Just acts that way at school? Hermione! Have you lost your brain!? It's Snape!" he fumed.

"I know that, Ron. And I don't appreciate you asking me such a thing like that." I told him as I curled my knees up to my stomach. "I think it might just be Harry. I mean, I've ran into him at school before when I was without either of you and he was decent."

"Hermione! Do I need to ask it again? He's evil! Pure, cold, Slytherin evil!"

"Ronald Weasley! I am not saying I am going to become best friends with him! I'm just saying that things don't always have to be tense and awkward with him! Think Ron! I am alone in my house with him, and I'd loose my mind if we didn't speak! That would just make things more awkward, wouldn't it? I mean seeing him every day here, and having no memory of speaking with him and driving myself crazy wondering if he is in fact actually here?"

"Fine." He said after a moment. "As long as you don't go calling each other by first names or anything. And don't you dare ever call him nice! And when school starts back up you better not go off telling Harry and me stories of your summer with Snape!"

"I'll try and hold my tongue." I said sarcastically after a moment of thinking how nice it would feel to hit Ron across the head with a frying pan for even thinking, even _suggesting_ such a thing as to converse about Snape out of school. "Anyway Ron, I am going to get off the phone now. And I probably won't call you tomorrow. Or the next day, it's awkward talking to you so frequently in the summer like this."

"Oh, but it isn't with Snape!?"

"You know what I mean." I sighed impatiently. "Usually it takes me days, _weeks_, to get a hold of you. And now, talking like this two days in a row on top of Snape and my parents' being gone, it's throwing me off. This isn't a normal summer, but I'd like to at least _try_ and keep it slightly normal."

"Alright, I get it." He sighed. "I'll talk to you later then, I guess."

"Yeah, bye Ron."

"Bye 'Mione." He said softly before hanging up, and I rolled over and flicked off my light, still in day clothes, and fell into a deep and restful sleep.

TBC


	4. Student Teaching

**Inside**

Chapter Three: Student Teaching

**Hermione's POV**

The heat of the new day blazed down unbearably against my face as I rolled unconsciously towards my uncovered window.

I squinted my eyes painfully to look at my clock, and seeing it to be only 7:28, moaned out in protest as I kicked my shoes off and rolled back onto my belly. But it was no use. The heat of the sun continued beating down on me without end or mercy, and so reluctantly I crawled out of bed and walked tired-dizzy over to my door and turned the handle with half closed eyes and a fully asleep mind.

"Couch," I mumbled while pulling my door shut behind me and scratching at an itch on my elbow.

"Miss Granger, I didn't expect to see you awake at this hour," Snape's voice said from behind me as I was about to begin my decent down the twisting stairs.

"No," I told him while forcibly shaking my head back and forth as I turned to face him. "I'm not awake yet, the sun shines in my room in the morning and I couldn't sleep; it woke me up. I was going to go down to the couch and get some more rest." I struggled to say, slurring my words with every other syllable.

"Why not draw the curtains?" he asked suggestively. "Surly that would be easier than going all the way downstairs?"

"I don't," I swallowed. "I don't have any."

"Then why not go to your parents room?" he wondered.

"I don't want to mess up their presumably perfect bed." I told him with a tired sigh. "Now Professor, I don't mean to be rude but I am extremely tired and don't really have the strength the keep up talking."

"That is quite alright, Miss Granger, as this is your house not mine and have the ability to act however which way you like, though being tired you are not rude." He said formally as I felt my body begin to sway forwards and back. "Oh my!" He proclaimed as I heard footsteps rushing towards me, and then felt unfamiliar hands on my shoulders. "Get into my room; you'll fall down the stairs and injure yourself if you don't get off your feet. Here, come this way."

I wanted to shout out in protest as his hands grabbed mine and led me forward with him, but all I was able to do was as he repositioned me against him was, "Okay," as he wrapped an arm around my back and pulled me alongside him by pulling at my hands and pushing at my back.

"Tired," I whispered softly as he leaned me gently down onto the bed with my back down.

"I can see that," he said softly. "Well I must say you certainly are someone else entirely when you are away from school, Miss Granger."

"You… are… too…" I was barley able to get the words out of my mouth before my eyes drooped shut and darkness engulfed me.

**Snape's POV**

I looked down at her quickly sleeping figure as I pulled the covers over her legs and chest and smiled weakly at how much she reminded me of when I was younger, and how I was able to sleep in as late as she without a regret in the world. And unconsciously I placed the palm of my hand against her forehead and said to her softly, "Sweet dreams." I had never had a daughter of my own or any children at that, and assumed my natural instinct to take care of her was brought about by the needlessness of having to take care of anybody but myself.

She moaned out softly and I smiled again.

I walked over and pulled the drapes in the windows tightly together as to leave no cracks for the sun to sneak through before looking at her one last time.

* * *

I leaned my back tightly into the crook of the couch before grabbing an old, faded, worn and torn edition of _Dracula_ by Bram Stoker that I had found in the bookcase and began reading shortly after arriving at the Granger's. I let out a sigh and brushed my hand over the cover twice before opening it up to the correct page and picking up where I had left off.

But I was hardly able to turn, let alone finish, a page before my mind was racing back to what had just happened in the guest room upstairs. What I had said to her, and how I had placed my hand against her forehead… why had I done those things? I had always shown a general dislike of her before, so why now the unintentional and tender affection towards her? She had always had a way to annoy me with her ability to know the answer to anything before she had even heard the entirety of it all. But was that really dislike, or hate? Or was it jealousy of not doing the same thing (though I could have) when I was her age? And her friendship with Mr. Potter and Weasley, was that just jealousy as well?

I shut the book and let my head fall backwards while closing my eyes and letting out a long, exaggerated sigh. Why was I even thinking of these things? Why was I even thinking of her? And foremost, why, out of all the dozens and dozens of students Albus suggested I stay the summer with, had I refused everyone immediately, but merely shrugged my shoulders and said _very well_ when he mentioned her name? Was it because of my attitude towards her that I felt I needed to repent to her?

_And she's gotten so beautiful over the years. Her hair, her skin, her voice, her eyes, her lips… _

My eyes shot open and the book slipped from my lap and crashed noiselessly to the floor at my feet.

Where – did – that – come – from - ?

* * *

**Hermione's POV**

_How can I not have eaten yesterday? _I wondered to myself as I stood staring into the half-empty refrigerator. _I mean really, not a single thing! _I sighed and dropped my elbow onto the door and slapped my hand against my temple. _What am I even in the mood for? Something light ought to do it. But no, I haven't eaten in nearly forty-eight hours; I better try at something a bit more substantial. _

After deciding what to fix, I walked over to the pantry and began gathering out ingredients: honey, olive oil, apple cider vinegar, sesame seeds, twirl pasta and lemon juice. I then made my way back to the refrigerator and pulled out a pack of chicken breasts, baby spinach and shredded parmesan cheese.

_Oh, darn! _I thought while slamming my hand onto my forehead and closing my eyes; suddenly remembering I wasn't alone.

"Um, Professor Snape, I'm sorry I didn't ask you earlier. You're just so quiet I forgot you were here," I laughed. "I haven't eaten in two days and I'm _starving_ and was about to fix something and was wondering if you'd want to join me?"

"That's very thoughtful of you Miss Granger," he smiled while closing the book in his lap. "However it is very nice of you, I wouldn't want to inconvenience you. So no, thank you, but I am fine."

"Really Professor," I told him. "I'd feel terribly awkward eating out there and you in here by yourself… are you sure you won't join me?"

"I can't. I am already a bother to you and your parents by invading in on you all like this with such short notice."

"Well you don't have to be. You can help me cook." I suggested thoughtfully.

"I… I suppose that could work. But I must warn you," he told me while pulling himself into a standing position. "I have never cooked without magic."

"Well you've been my teacher for the past five years Professor Snape," I reminded him as we walked side-by-side into the kitchen. "It's about time I return the favor and teach you something you know nothing about. But you've an advantage."

"And what may that be?"

"You teach Potions, it isn't as if you've never mixed something with your hands before."

* * *

"Oh, Professor Snape!" I laughed while placing my hand over my mouth to contain the high pitched giggles escaping my throat. "You're not supposed to fill it all the way up to the top!" I couldn't help but laugh more as I looked over at him, soaked from stomach to socks with water.

"I don't understand," he said with confused eyebrows as he set the now half empty pot onto the counter. "You said to fill it."

"Yes but not all the way!" I was laughing so hard. "I can't believe that just happened! I can't stop laughing!" I said as I took my arms and wrapped them tightly around my stomach and bent over forwards. "My stomach! My stomach! Oh, God! Make it stop, make it stop!"

"Miss Granger!" he said while placing his balled fist onto his hip and looking over at me. "Is it really necessary to laugh at me like this? I've got to stay being wet like this as I can't do magic because an underage witch still lives here!"

"I'm sorry!" I bellowed. "But I just can't stop! I've never seen you like this! I can't, I've never seen you do such a thing!"

"Alright, I understand you find it funny."

"Yes, it is!" I laughed, nearly hyperventilating from lack of rhythmic breaths.

I went to walk forward but stepped misfortunately onto the puddle of water that had leaked to my direction from Snape's too-full pot of water and slipped and fell right onto my back. "Ow!" I laughed, both truly in pain and still entertained. "Ow!"

"Okay, now that was funny!" He laughed while bending over and hanging his head above the tiled floor. "Really very, very funny."

"It wasn't!" I told him through slightly lightened laughs. "It was your fault; I wouldn't have fallen if you hadn't filled it all the way and spilled nearly the whole of it onto yourself and the floor! It really hurt."

"Well I'm sorry Miss Granger," he laughed. "Just give me a moment to stop laughing and I'll help you up."

"No Professor, I don't need your help. I can manage myself." I said as I was able to calm myself at last, and regulate my breathing back to its norm. I then rolled onto my stomach and began pulling myself up with my elbows and feet, but hit another spot of water and fell right back down to my bum and back.

"Yes, I can see that," he said as he was too able to calm himself down. "It's my fault, let me help you up."

"Yeah, okay," I said as I extended my hand towards his. "Thanks." I said as he gripped his hand tightly around mine, and cupped his other one around my elbow and pulled me off the floor and back to my feet.

He smiled as we parted. "Back to cooking, then."

TBC


	5. Goodnight

**Inside**

Chapter Four: Goodnight

**Snape's POV**

I turned away and held my hand firmly against my chest with electricity still coursing through it like wild fire; it hadn't left since the moment our hands parted. The realization had not hit me until that moment of contact, the reasons why I had been so cruel to her, why I had been so quick to judge her for being nothing more than an irritating know-it-all. The reason why in that one moment of silence earlier today I had thought those things about her, and why I had placed my hand to her forehead after offering her my room and wished her sweet dreams only after she had already fallen asleep.

_I loved her._

"So you'll want to put that pot on the stove; I've already turned it on for you. And add a dollop of olive oil, then wait for it to boil for a couple minutes, then you can add that box of pasta to it and let it cook for nine minutes. I'll get started on the dressing. And after that I'll show you how to help me with the chicken."

I leaned against the countertop and watched as she began pouring equal amounts of three different liquids into separate containers, and then transfer them all into a forth container, where she began beating them together.

"Shall I get started on the chicken?" I asked her after a few moments of silence of watching her and her having no idea of it.

"Um, well you can open the packaging and rinse them with cold water from the faucet. I'll be there to help you in just a moment; I'm almost finished here I just need to add the sesame seeds then my attention will be all yours."

**Hermione's POV**

I told Snape that he helped out enough with the making of dinner, and leaned up against the side of the counter beside the sink and watched as he retired into the lounge with my heart standing still in my chest.

My mouth opened and I let out a deep breath of air I had been holding as he disappeared behind the corner and into the lounge. The way he had been acting since the morning was just not normal of him; he was being nice. Not just nice but extremely nice. And extremely comfortable, with not only the house… but me as well. His eyes on me nearly every moment during dinner, and thinking I wouldn't notice it! Perhaps it was nothing, I thought as I turned and began loading the dishwasher, I was just thinking too much into it. The man hated me! He was probably just amazed that I was able to fend for myself for a few weeks and actually know what I was doing. Or maybe he was just jealous I knew how to take care of myself without any help from magic at all.

Still, I wish he didn't make it so obvious about what he was thinking. I mean we both know this is the last place he'd want to spend a couple months at, regardless of what he said, he probably just said it to be nice so he'd be able to make it up at the start of next term. And decent conversation with him or not, _I _can't stand him! I can't believe I actually talked to Ron about him! I mean honestly! The things I said! It's unbearable living in a house alone with him! Just knowing he is here; sleeping in a bed in a room directly beside mine is sickening! And to think in my tired state this morning I actually slept in a bed he sleeps in, before he even made it! When he himself had _more than likely_ slept in it less than an hour, or half hour, before myself!

I shuddered at the thought of it, and if what was already bad could possibly get any worse, became horrible as a glass slipped from my loose grip and dropped to the floor, shattering everywhere as I let out a painstaking and pitiful, "Shit!"

"Is everything alright?" He was around the corner and in front of me before I even had time to look up. Great! Now he had even more to make fun of me for later! Well, at least I'd be able to tell people how he doused himself in water without meaning to.

"Yeah," I told him sulkily. "Everything is fine Professor; I just wasn't paying attention and dropped a glass. You can get back to your reading."

"Are you sure you're alright, Miss Granger, you seem-"

"I'm fine. I've broken glasses before; it's just a bit of glass," I told him. "I just hate breaking things when my parent's aren't here, it feels disrespectful to them." I lied quickly as I crouched down and began picking up pieces of the bigger glass and placing them into the palm of my hand. "But I'll just tell them when they- OW!" I shrieked as a sharper edge gouged itself into my skin and immediately began spurting blood. "Darn it that's deep," I mumbled while dropping the glass from my hand back to the floor and pressing my opposite hand over it.

"It is," Snape said as I stood and sucked in a mouthful of air through my clenched teeth and closed my eyes. "I may not be trained in the muggle way of life, but you should rinse that," he suggested as I felt his hands on my shoulders. "Miss Granger? Are you alright?"

"Yeah, it just twinges a bit," I whispered. "So bloody stupid!" I added in a mumble as he turned me slowly to face the sink, as if I were an infant who were incapable of even walking.

He took my hands in his and pulled them apart delicately. "Yes, you are bleeding a good amount. Here, run it under this," he said after turning the faucet to its coldest and lightest setting.

"I just need to apply pressure to it to stop the bleeding. In the cupboard in the bathroom beside the mirror you'll find gauze and antibiotic ointment; it's labeled, could you go get them for me? And some cloth tape too, please."

"Yes, of course."

It didn't really hurt as bad as I was making it out to be, I was just so embarrassed and upset with myself for letting such a stupid thing happen in front of him. Though it was bleeding quite a lot, it wasn't the blood that was making me feel sick. It was him and his kindness and uncanny ability to always be around me at the worst time possible! And not to mention the fact he'd been touching me all bleeding day, what was wrong with him!? Seeing me unstable wasn't enough? He had to feel how tense my body was, too? I bit back tears of frustration while turning off the faucet and lifting my head at the sound of his quickly approaching steps.

"Here you are. What do you need first?" he asked quickly, overbearingly.

"Nothing. Thanks for getting these, but I can help myself." I told him while taking a folded towel and squeezing it in the palm of my hand and unrolling the gauze with my right one.

How I wish he'd stop looking at me, all serious like! He's probably beside himself with laughter on the inside…

"I can do more than sit around reading and making a fool of myself while trying to cook with you all summer, please, what do you need me to do?" he asked as I opened my eyes and looked up at him.

"You really don't need t-"

"What do you need?" he cut me off seriously.

"The antibiotic ointment," I told him. "It needs to go directly over the cut once the bleeding has slowed down a bit. And after that we can wrap it in gauze, then tape it closed. I'd say I needed stitches, but the palm of the hand heals so quickly it wouldn't even be worth it. I'll just keep it covered and it'll be fine."

"Shall we check it then?" he asked after a few moments of shared silence.

"Yes."

After washing his own hands, we walked over to the kitchen table and he squeezed a generous amount of ointment onto his forefinger tip and gently rubbed it onto the cut, I winced and pulled my hand back, but his opposite hand was cupped around my wrist so I didn't get far.

"Sorry," he apologized as he wiped his finger onto the cloth I had been clutching. "Does it hurt badly?"

"No," I told him truthfully this time. "More sharp than anything, I just wasn't expecting that sort of pain from a cut."

"Well, as you said, it will heal quickly so before you know it there will be no pain at all," he sighed as he began wrapping the thin gauze around my hand; between my thumb and forefinger and around my wrist, back and forth. As he placed the tape on the two separate ends of gauze and momentarily cupped his hand around the top of mine and gently squeezed.

* * *

"It's really weird having him here," I went on at long last speaking with Viktor. "I was so stupid to say yes to Dumbledore! It is so uncomfortable! And with my parent's gone it really _is _just us here. Alone."

"Vell, it can't be that bad. It is only until summer is over, then you only haff him during one class at school," he told me thoughtfully as I lay on my bed with my pillow pulled tight to my chest. "I think it vas fery thoughtful of you to say yes, him haffing no vhere else to go. That is vot I luff about you."

"I wish it were you here instead of him," I told him honestly.

"I haff been vishing that since I met you," he told me back just as honest.

A moment of comfortable silence passed before either of us spoke again.

"So how is your hand?" he asked. "Does it hurt badly?"

"No, it isn't that bad. I was just being stupid and was so frustrated at the time and forgot what I was doing, it wasn't until I felt the pain I even remembered I had glass in my hand."

"If I vas there I vould kiss it better."

"I bet you would."

"You know I vould."

"I know," I laughed. "Viktor, I really love talking with you; hearing your voice, but I-"

"Haff to go," he finished for me.

"I'm sorry," I told him sorrowfully. "It's just I never finished cleaning up the glass from the kitchen, let alone cleaning the kitchen. Will you call tomorrow?" I asked after a moment.

"Of course," he promised. "But why don't you haff Snape clean it? He is not staying there for free."

"Right, because he'll be able to let _that_ go when term starts," I shook my head and sat up. "No, I need to do it, it was my fault and I can't trust he'll do it right, he's used to using magic for these things."

"Very vell," Viktor sighed. "I vill talk to you tomorrow."

"Okay, talk to you tomorrow Viktor. Bye."

"Goodnight."

* * *

As I made my way into the kitchen I was both surprised and shocked to find it completely and utterly cleaned.

"Professor, did you do that?" I asked as I walked into the lounge. "The kitchen I mean."

"Yes. I knew you were on the phone, so I just thought I'd try my hand at muggle cleaning."

"Oh, well you didn't have to do that."

"I didn't want you to hurt your hand," he pointed out. "It was not a big deal, Miss Granger, it was rather easier than I thought it would be."

"I wouldn't have, we have rubber gloves I just would have worn those."

"Well, still, it is done."

"I guess I'll have an early night then," I told him, not knowing what else to say.

"Yes, I think I'll do that too," he nodded as he pulled himself up from the couch and began walking in my direction.

"Sounds good, I'll just lock up and see you in the morning then."

"Actually, that is taken care of as well. I took the liberty to do it also while you were on the phone."

"Oh," I gaped. "I guess you've left me with nothing to do other than go to bed."

"It appears so," he laughed. "I'll try to leave you something tomorrow."

"Okay, thanks."

As I reached the top of the stairs I was reaching for my handle when I felt him standing not far behind me. And so, I turned to see what it was he wanted.

"Is there something you need, Professor?" I asked him stupidly while pulling my hand away from my door and looking up at him.

"Nothing just…" he said awkwardly. "Goodnight, Miss Granger," he smiled, opening his eyes to look down at me.

"Goodnight," I nodded once, but was barley able to make half a turn away before his arms were wrapped around me, and his lips on mine.

I was so shocked all I could do was stand there. But then, as reality set in, I realized he was still kissing me, so I pulled my hands up to his chest and shoved him off of me with all my might. I fell against the wall and could do nothing but look up at him in horror and never ending shock.

He took a step towards me looking as if he were going to try and kiss me again, but this time – knowing what was to come I forced my feet beneath me to move and stumbled backwards into my room and slammed my door, locking it as quickly as my hands could move. I placed my hand over my open mouth and listened as he walked across the hall and into the guest room.

The rest of the summer passed in silence.

TBC


	6. Accident

**Inside**

Chapter Five: Accident

**Hermione's POV**

"Glass you say?" Ron asked as we made our way further down the path towards the castle, having missed the carriages with a handful of others. "Had no idea it could leave a scar like that."

"Well its glass Ronald, it can be sharp just like anything else," I explained as I looked down at the thick pink scar shining freshly up at me. "Daggers, swords, needles, scissors, push-pins, nail- Ah! Violent curses shot off by stupid idiots on the first day back! Bloody hell Malfoy, what the hell was that for!?" I gasped as I looked down at the sleeve of my tan jacket, staining with bright red blood.

"What's the idea you bastard!?" Ron shot as he pulled out his own wand. "What the hell!? You'll pay for that one!"

"It was an accident! I swear! Believe me, if I'd of meant to do that I'd of aimed for her gut! Damn Granger, where did you come from? I didn't even see you! Talk about bad luck, I was only practicing the curse; didn't mean for it to actually hit anyone!"

"Fucker!" I cursed under my breath. "Shit, bloody hurts! Damn! What the hell did you do!? Ow!" I cried, closing my eyes and attempting to cup my hand down tightly against the gashes now gushing blood down my pants and along the gravel path.

"Look guys! Real Mud-blood!" Malfoy laughed with his goons as Ron made ready to lunge for him.

"MISTER MALFOY!" McGonagall boomed as she came forth from the shadows. "That language is entirely inappropriate! And Miss Granger, what on earth happened?"

"How dare you call her that!" Ron screamed as he raised his hand, wand at the ready.

"I don't care what he calls me Ron, it just won't stop _hurting_!"

"Miss Granger! What happened? Who did this to you?"

"It was Malfoy Professor!" Ron told her furiously as I felt the warmth leaving my cheeks. "He did it to her!"

"It was an accident!" Malfoy squealed. "As I told them, if I'd have meant to do it to her I'd have aimed elsewhere!"

"Professor McGonagall," I said weakly. "I don't feel so- so well."

"These are gashes I've never seen before," McGonagall said as she began examining my arm after violently ripping off my sleeve. "What is it you hit her with, Mister Malfoy?"

"I don't know exactly. I came up with it myself over the summer."

"Wonderful, an underage invention! This ought to be a synch to cure!" she proclaimed. "This way Miss Granger, you'll need to see Professor Slughorn for this one, I doubt Madam Pomfrey would have anything for it as it isn't supposed to exist. Detention, Mister Malfoy! One month! And fifty points from Slytherin!"

* * *

"Oh! Horace, Horace thank goodness I found you so quickly! We need your help, there's been an accident," McGonagall said as we approached the small gathering of a few staff members. "And Severus, I've taken fifty points from Slytherin and given Mister Malfoy a weeks' detention."

"Whatever for, Minerva?" he asked as he looked over at her both judgmentally and suspiciously. "The first day, and already you are punishing Slytherin. Dumbledore hasn't even said the start of term speech, and you have already taken it in your hands to-"

"He attacked one of mine, Severus!" she shouted as Ron and I stood back, in a way unable for anyone but McGonagall to even know we were there. "Miss Granger is seriously injured because of an idiotic invention of his! And you are blaming me for harassing your house!? How dare you even assume what happened! Let alone accuse me my actions towards Mister Malfoy are for no reason! Reason! Just look at her!"

Ron shoved me forward forcefully, swaying back and forth with my hand still pressured tightly around my forearm and Ron's hand holding my back to support me from falling over. "It was an accident," I said weakly to Professor Snape, speaking to him for the first time since summer, and to Professor Slughorn, to whom I had never before seen, let alone met.

"Yeah," Ron scoffed. "Says he! We all know he meant to do it! He's hated on you, Harry and me for years! Waited till he finally got an opportunity to strike without any teachers around!"

"Ron please just stop it!" I shouted. "I don't care if he meant to do it or didn't! It just hurts really badly and I want it to stop and I want you to just shut up! Please! I don't care who or what makes it stop, I just want it to stop and to forget it ever happened! It was an accident and I don't blame him for it; he was just practicing and I was standing in his line of fire and got hit, that's all, Ronald. He wouldn't have acted the way he did if he meant to do it, nor would he have said what he did!"

"She's right Mister Weasley, it doesn't matter right now," McGonagall said. "Now Horace, can you help us or are you just going to stand there like a mute child?"

"I'm sorry," he said. "Minerva, but that is quite a lot of blood, isn't it?"

"Yes!" she shouted. "Yes it is! And the longer we stand here discussing it she's just becoming weaker! Now, will you please help us?"

"You should take her to Madam Pomfrey, I am sure she will be a better help than me. I don't do to well around blood, other than my own, that is."

"She can not help here, Horace! This was done by a curse that is not supposed to exist! That doesn't exist!"

"I'm sorry… I ca-"

"I'll do it," Professor Snape cut him off. "As I can see Professor Slughorn can not work under pressure."

"Very good, Miss Granger, follow Professor Snape. I need to speak with Mister Malfoy and I'm sorry Mister Weasley but you'll need to come with me and help Mister Malfoy explain to me _exactly_ what happened to Miss Granger."

"I can't," I told her weakly, swallowing. "I can't walk without him, I'm too weak Professor."

"I am sorry as well Miss Granger, but I need him to come with me. Professor Snape can help you along your way," she said as Ron began to open his mouth in protest. "NOW, Mister Weasley, Professor Snape is perfectly capable to help her walk! Now come along!"

"This way, Miss Granger," Professor Snape said as he began walking slowly towards the exit of the Great Hall with my upper arm gripped in his hand.

"Professor, I – can't…" I whispered softly as I felt myself fall forwards, but was prevented hitting the stone floor as his arms caught me. "I'm… sorry…" I added with barley open eyes as my feet were pulled from the ground and I was lifted into his arms.

"It really was an accident," I told him softly as I was set in a thickly cushioned chair across from his with my bleeding arm lying atop his desk.

"That doesn't matter, Miss Granger. What matters is that it happened and you are hurt. Accident or not, Mister Malfoy shouldn't have been doing a spell like that at all, let alone at school. Now you see why I always ask for my class to keep wands away; something could happen.

"Now, what did it feel like when it hit you?" he asked as he took my hand in his and placed his opposite hand under my elbow to lift it from his desk to examine it closer. I winced as he brought my arm further away from the desk and gripped his hand tightly and closed my eyes while curling my toes within my shoes.

"Like fire," I told him softly. "And shards of glass, it was the worst kind of pain I have ever felt… I still feel it, though not as sharp, it's still there."

"Yes, they're deep, quite deep. The wounds themselves are very chaotic, not at all clean. It's nothing I've seen before, as far as curses go. I'll do my best not to cause you anymore unnecessary pain." I nodded as he set my arm back down to the desk and freed his hands from mine, and I opened my eyes to look over at him.

"What are you going to do?" I asked him stupidly as he turned and began gathering supplies from a nearby cupboard.

"Well, I would suggest to put a simple scaring serum over them to stop the bleeding and pain, but, seeing as I don't know what this curse is exactly, I can't know if there are shards of anything in there, and I don't want to risk imbedding them in your arm. So, first I am going to dab on some anti-bleeding potion over it to see if I can better see what it looks like without all the blood; it may sting a little, so be p-"

"Just do it," I told him as my eyes met his. "It already hurts more than you can imagine, I doubt it could get much worse."

"Very well," he nodded as he brought a green colored liquid filled dropper to my arm and pinched the rubber holder atop it to release the liquid. I squeezed my eyes shut and nearly screamed as he continued with three more droplets.

"Are you alright?" he asked as he set the glass container onto his desk and replaced his hand back around mine. When I opened my eyes to look at him he was closer than I remembered, and his eyes looked sad.

"Yes," I told him breathlessly. "What does it look like?"

"Not like anything is in there," he told me, his hand still around mine. "But, looking at the skin just around the gashes, I'd say Mister Malfoy has been practicing some homemade black magic indeed. Does it still hurt?"

"Not as much."

"Good," he sighed. "I am now going to go ahead and put some scarring potion over them, which will stop any pain you are still feeling. Though the new skin will be tender for a few days, all the sharpness will be gone."

"Will it hurt as bad as the other one?" I asked him with nervousness plain across my face.

"No, if anything it won't feel like liquid at all, but solid, because the moment it touches your exposed flesh it will scar over."

"Then I'll be free to go?"

"Yes, and, if you're lucky you'll still get to hear the end of Professor Dumbledore's start-of-term speech," he said with a smile as he looked down at my arm and began dabbing on the scarring serum.

"And um, Professor," I began nervously. "In the summer, when you - after dinner, at the top of the stairs - when you, you, you know…" I trailed as he stopped dabbing at my arm.

"You remembered…"

"Well of course I remembered!" I nearly laughed. "You're my Professor, and it was, well… it was the first time that ever happened to me," I told him seriously.

"You didn't speak to me after," he said back softly. "I tried to speak to you, but you were always-"

"Busy?" I asked him. "Well it was a bit shocking! And strange… I mean, you were being so nice to me, I just thought it was so you could make it up during the school year, you know, by being rude again. But now school's back and you're still being nice… But it wasn't even the… the kiss, that made me react the way I did. I reacted the way I did because of how it made me feel; how it made me feel being against you like that…" I trailed off, knowing I had already said too much.

"Now," he said as he pulled himself back into a proper sitting position and gathered his supplies together. "You'll want to go easy on how often you use your arm for the next week or so, Miss Granger. And if there are any other problems with it, come back to my office and I will look at it. I suspect your friends are waiting for you to see how you are. See you tomorrow in class."

"Yes," I said knowingly as I looked to my side to see Professor McGonagall and Malfoy had just entered. "Thank you Professor."

I left the room holding my arm against my stomach and my heart hammering in my chest.

TBC


	7. It Can Never Be

**Inside**

Chapter Six: It Can Never Be

**Snape's POV**

"Mister Malfoy, she was _trembling_ with pain!" Minerva went on furiously. "You've no right to be practicing such a thing at school, let alone at home! Or at all, for that matter. I have half a mind to simply drop your detentions and expel you right now."

"However, Minerva, such an action as that rests in the Head of House, which, in this case, you are not." Albus pointed out.

"No. But if I were…" she trailed, clearly too spiteful to continue.

"I think," I began as I paced once more in front of the fire with my hands crossed behind my back. "That we ought to hear what happened, through Mister Malfoy's point of view, before any punishment should be established."

"As I told Professor McGonagall," he began. "I was just walking up to the castle with a bunch of others, as we'd missed the carriages, and we were just talking. Then I started on about how I'd invented something over the holiday, but no one believed me; said I was just trying to impress them. So I pulled out my wand to show them, not aiming it at anyone, well, intentionally that is. And the next thing I know Granger is screaming and there's blood all down her, and Weasley's shouting at me."

"Tell them what else you told me, Mister Malfoy," Minerva added.

Draco let out a sigh before obliging. "I said that, that if I'd been aiming for Granger I'd of aimed somewhere else," he finished, looking defeated with his hands at his sides and his head angled downward towards the ground.

"Due to your immature stupidity and enlarged ego, Mister Malfoy, Miss Granger lost a considerably vast amount of blood and gained a vastly, extraordinarily large amount of scars on her left forearm, which, will be there for life because of you," I told him, now facing him. "Inventing things at your age while is impressive is highly frowned upon. You are underage and thus under educated, some may argue that you are even stupid. And seeing that all you did, according to Professor McGonagall, was laugh at your mistake, I'd argue quite strongly that my previous assessment is an understatement."

"No need for an attitude here, Severus," Albus said.

"Believe me sir, if I had an attitude you would all know," I told him calmly, keeping my true anger incased inside of me. "I think it would be prudent, then, Mister Malfoy, to give you not only a months detention, but two, or three months, or however long it takes to make you understand what you did and to knock some well-needed sense into you."

"What!?" Draco proclaimed, ripping himself from his seat and looking at me furiously. "That is completely unfair! I said it was an accident, didn't I?"

"You said yourself you'd have aimed differently if you'd been meaning to hit Miss Granger, Mister Malfoy," I reminded him. "Now take your seat, and don't make my generous suggestion for punishment dissipate into something else."

"Yeah," he huffed. "You call that generous."

"How is this then, if you call my offer so generous, or too generous, which is what I am getting at. No, I think it would be better served to give you an on-campus suspension. Consisting of removing your wand from your possession and forbidding you to attend any classes for one month. And then, after that month, I, along with Professor Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall will discuss and see if any further action ought to be taken."

"It – was – an – accident!" he fumed while balling his hands into tight fists.

"Which could have taken someone's life!" I shouted. "Now hand me your wand, Mister Malfoy, you are excused. And," I added as he ripped his wand from his inner robe pocket and held it out to me. "If I hear of you using or borrowing anyone else's wand, or asking about certain class subjects, you _will be_ expelled. Have a good dinner."

"I must say," Albus began after Minerva and Draco had gone. "That was not at all the response I was expecting you to have on Mister Malfoy, he's always been one of your favorites. Has he not?"

"He has."

"So why the sudden change of heart towards him, Severus? Did you grow to care for Miss Granger over the holiday? Because it seemed to me your interest in this matter was anything but passive."

"My interest is purely out of the safety of the student body here at Hogwarts, Albus. What Mister Malfoy did was extremely foolish, and it could have been anyone whom he hit with that ridiculous curse; I'd have reacted the same way for any other student."

"I see," he nodded. "So as long as that's settled, there is a feast awaiting us in the Great Hall."

* * *

"Where were you?" Hermione asked as Ron shoved another helping of roast beef into his mouth.

"I was in a carriage," Harry told her while loading his plate. "Why? Weren't you?"

"No," she shook her head. "And neither was Ron, we missed them along with a few others… including _Malfoy_."

"Malfoy? Really? Didn't give you any trouble did he?"

"Well there's a reason I'm still in my muggle clothes Harry," she shook her head. "My _blood soaked _muggle clothes."

"Oh," he paused in his action. "Oh, you are, I didn't even notice. How'd that happen then? You two get into a brawl or something?"

"Harry!" Hermione laughed in frustration before throwing a roll at his head. "No! We didn't get into a brawl! Ron, help me!"

"He attacked her, mate!" Ron told him after swallowing his food. "A nasty homemade curse at that, the bloody bastard. Nearly killed her she bled so much! I'd of jumped him and shown him a few tricks of my own had McGonagall not shown up when she had."

"Homemade curse? But Malfoy's still underage, isn't he? How'd he come up with that when schools only just started?"

"Well that's the thing with homemade magic, it doesn't exist yet so there's no way to prove its real magic because there's no way of knowing if it will actually work. But, in this case, and as much to my displeasure and rotten luck, it did."

"I'm really sorry Hermione; if I was there I would of sh-"

"Attention students," Dumbledore cut off Harry as he took another stand behind his podium. "I must apologize for the inconvenience of two speeches this start of term, but there is something that has been brought to my attention that I must not let stand silent… You all know how our world works. You may not - under any circumstances other than serious emergencies - use magic outside of school until you are of age, seventeen. No – Matter – What.

"A student was very seriously harmed here tonight, by a curse. A homemade one. Now, both the victim and offender know who you are, and perhaps others do as well. And while I have your attention, I cannot stress enough the seriousness and danger of making such a thing, let alone while you are not yet seventeen.

"We could have had a death here tonight, and all because of a careless and unwise decision," Dumbledore went on, but the words were no longer able to penetrate through Hermione's ears. Instead they turned into an intangible background noise.

"I have to go," she said softly as Ron and Harry looked over to her with worry. "I just – I've got to go. I can't be here."

"Do you want us to come with you?" Ron asked as he leaned close to her, his breath brushing against her ear.

"No, I'll see you in the common room later. Take care of the first years, will you? I need some air. – Don't you dare follow me Harry Potter," she added quickly as Harry began pulling himself from the bench in synch with her.

* * *

My eyes followed as she strode quickly down the Great Hall and out of sight, and I noticed Minerva standing with her eyes on the same spot as mine.

"No Minerva, I am the one who talked with Miss Granger about what happened. I shall be the one to see what this is about, as I have already had a private discussion with Albus, I know all what he is going to say."

"She is in my House, Severus," she pointed out. "And as I am also female and have a _unique _relationship with Mister Malfoy I am sure I can relate to her more. I am sure she would feel more comfortable discussing whatever the reason she left with me, rather than you."

"Though you make a good argument, Minerva, Mister Malfoy is in my House. So whatever problem Miss Granger has with him I will be more than willing to pass the message onto him."

"Oh, very well," she gave up, lowering herself back down to her seat. "But if she shows any sign of discomfort, come get me and I will see her."

"Will do, Minerva," I told her before walking away from the staff table, and exiting the room from the back entrance.

* * *

"I smell like rust," she said softly from a small distance away. "But all you smell is the salt don't you Crookshanks? Oh, _no_, don't lick it! That's disgusting Crookshanks. Honestly, don't you eat enough food without having to have Mummy's blood-stained clothes as well? Oh, right, go on then, go find a nice juicy mouse."

"Miss Granger," I said softly as I made my way towards her. "You're not supposed to leave while Professor Dumbledore is making his speech."

"You scared me," she breathed quickly. "And he… he already made his speech, I don't need to hear another one. Besides, it's nothing I need to hear that I don't already know."

"Be that as it may… I am going to have to give you a detention."

"What!?" she burst out. "By what means!? I didn't do anything wro-"

I silenced her by placing my index finger over her lips. "I know, but I am Professor Snape… and _our_ history here, well, how would it look if I didn't give you one for doing something I wouldn't normally approve of?"

"Easily, I was the one who was hurt. And, Malfoy has detention as well; I refuse to be in the same room with him ever again. Professor Snape, no, I'm sorry, but I won't. And besides, how would it look if you _did_ put me in detention, just from leaving a speech from Dumbledore that everyone knew was bound to upset me in the first place."

"I suppose you are right," I sighed while dropping to my knees in front of her. "But I just… I have to be alone with you, I just have to. And I see no other way to be."

"Why would you want that?"

"You know why, Miss Granger," I told her while looking over at her trembling face. "You know."

"I know," she huffed out a soft laugh. "I just… Professor, you know we can't… we can't. It can never be," her voice cracked on her last word, and I reached out to take her hand; she did not pull away, but instead, went easily with it.

"Because I am your Professor and you're my student?" I asked her. "Do you think I really care about that? No one would know, no one would even suspect. We hate each other, remember? No one would suspect a thing, not ever."

"I… _know_," she moaned out softly as I began slowly kissing her cupped hand around mine. "But think what would happen if someone did find out."

She squeezed her fingers around my hand as I lifted my head to look at her. "Then I'd be taken away, have my teaching license revoked… but I would have you."

"I am not worth any of that," she told me seriously. "None of it."

"Is it any consolation that I don't care of the risk?"

"No," she told me softly, pulling her hand from mine and sliding herself back up the wall. "I'm sorry Professor… but it can never be. Regardless how either - or both of us - feels… please understand. I can't be with you." As she turned to walk away from me she placed her hand over her mouth and a tear rolled down her cheek. A sob filled my ears as she disappeared behind the corner, and her footsteps became quick and loud, indicating that she had began running.

"I love you…"

TBC


	8. The Letter

**Inside**

Chapter Seven: The Letter

**Hermione's POV**

My heart hammered quickly against my chest as I leaned up against the stone wall beside the portrait of the fat lady, thinking stupidly of myself for running off like that without even knowing the password. I was so careless for not even opening the before start of term letter to find out the new password in the first place! And then, walking up to the castle with Ron, I was too busy by the time I got to the castle almost _dying_ to even be told what it was! Stupid, stupid, stup-

"Hermione?" Ron asked as he appeared beside me. "What are you doing out here still? I led all the first years like you said, thinking you'd be inside, but Ginny said you weren't in your dormitory… I was worried, where have you been?"

"Walking around," I told him. "Sorry, I didn't mean to worry you. I- I didn't know the password."

"You? Not knowing something me, Ron Weasley knows?" he asked proudly. "Who'd of ever guessed the day would come. Here, it's-" he began, turning from me to face the portrait of the fat lady. "Honey Dukes."

"Honey Dukes?" I asked, following in behind him as we walked through the porthole to the common room. "Rather simple though, isn't it?"

"Yeah, but, never mind that. Hermione, what's wrong?" he asked as he took a seat on the couch across from the cracking fire; patting the spot beside him. "Sit for a minute, won't you?"

"Ron, I just nearly bled to death," I told him as I crossed my arms over my chest and took the seat next to him. "If there is anyone in this entire school who has something on their mind Ron, I get first priority."

"Yeah, I know, but, no. Hermione, that's not what I'm talking about. Even before we got to school you've been acting different; not talking as much, isolated… just not you. Not my Hermione…" he trailed.

"Ron, it's just… you know what happened this summer," I began slyly. "First I had to house Snape, and then my parents took off, never to call _and_ leaving me alone with him. And then nearly as soon as I get to school I am hit with a curse… I just, you know, have stuff on my mind. I'm not all here right now, but I'll try to be. I didn't know it was showing so much, if I did I'd of tried to hide it better."

"No, Hermione, I'm sorry. You don't have to hide it; you should never have to hide how you're really feeling… I'm being stupid; senseless as always."

"No Ron," I told him as I reached out my hand to cup his. "I wasn't… I shouldn't be complaining. I got myself into all of this after all. I mean, if I hadn't said yes to Dumbledore about Snape staying over in the first place I wouldn't have had to spend the entire summer alone with him. And if my mind hadn't been preoccupied in the first place we'd of never missed the carriages to the school, and I would have never been hit with that stupid curse."

I watched him watch me as I spoke; not really paying attention to anything that left my mouth and instead just letting words flow out of me. And I knew by the way his eyes never left mine, and by the way his fingers laced themselves through mine that what Harry had been saying all these years was not just a silly, stupid joke, but very much the truth. Ron was in love with me; the hearts he was tracing along the top side of my hand confirmed it even more. And I knew I should love him, too. But I don't. I just don't. Who I love is someone I have always hated; always resented, even. But what I said to him was true: we could _never _be together, and that was just a fact. And I needed to get over him and move on. Move onto someone who was right for me, who was my age and who wasn't a teacher.

No, I couldn't be with Professor Snape, and I never could. So I'd just have to make myself fall in love with someone else…

"Hermione?" Ron's voice pierced my ears through the silence, making me look up having had no idea I was even looking down in the first place. "I hate seeing you cry."

"What?" I hadn't even noticed, I was crying. Warm lines of tears danced their way down my cheeks, drop after drop. "I'm sorry… I didn't-"

"It's alright, you don't have to apologize. Besides, no one is here but us, so no need to be embarrassed."

"I'm not," I began, thinking hard and deep about what I was about to do. "I'm not embarrassed Ron, I'm just…" I said softly as I slid myself sideways on the couch until our knees were touching.

"Just what?"

"This," I told him as I squeezed his hand tightly, and leaned into him while sliding my other hand up his chest until it was laced loosely at the back of his head, where I then closed my eyes and pressed my lips against his.

His hands were around me before another thought was even able to cross my mind; straddling me to his lap and sliding his tongue into my mouth rhythmically, almost fluently… but not lovingly.

At least… Not for me.

* * *

"What've you got?" Ron asked while looking down at his timetable; his hand resting atop my thigh.

"Er, Potions, Defense Against the Dark Arts, Herbology, Transfiguration, Care of Magical Creatures, _Divination_… the usual. You?" Harry responded, looking at his own.

"Well, I've got same as you Mate," Ron responded. "What about you Hermione?"

"I have Potions, Defense Against the Dark Arts, Ancient Runes, Transfiguration, Charms and Herbology," I told them before folding my timetable and sliding it into the inside pocket of my robe.

"Hold on, you've got Herbology sixth hour? But that's seventh years, isn't it?" Ron wondered.

"Yes, it is."

"But, why?"

"Well, it's simple really. If I'd of had third hour Herbology then I'd of had to have my Ancient Runes be sixth hour, also seventh year, and because of course I wouldn't want that I'd of had to switch Defense Against the Dark Arts to sixth hour, making Herbology sixth year. But, because I didn't want to have Ancient Runes seventh year I decided to keep Defense Against the Dark Arts first hour and keep Ancient Runes sixth year making Herbology seventh year, which in my opinion is _much _easier than seventh year Ancient Runes. Wouldn't you say?"

"Uh… erm… Yeah, yeah Hermione, whatever you say," Ron said awkwardly, laughing and wrapping an arm around my shoulders, hugging me to his side.

"Harry, you agree don't you? Or do you think I should have tried to go seventh year Ancient Runes?" I wondered, pulling out my timetable and reading it over again. "Oh, wait, no! Then I'd of had to have Defense Against the Dark Arts be sixth hour and I wouldn't want that at all! Mind you, it would have made me be in more classes with you… what d'you think Ron? Harry?" I asked, darting my eyes between the two of them.

"I think that, maybe, Hermione, you're taking this timetable thing a bit too far," Harry suggested, looking down at his mug then back up to me. "I mean… it's just a timetable, not the end of the world Hermione. You've plenty of time all of this year to think of what classes you really want to take. This year I think you should just focus on what classes you have, and leave it at that."

"But… I… Ron, what do you think?" I asked biting my lip nervously. "Oh, never mind… it's stupid, I'll see you guys in class," I said miserably, pulling Ron's arm off of me and pulling myself away from the bench.

"So, think she's got some underlying issues there?" I heard Harry ask once my back was turned and I had taken a few steps.

"She did have a rough summer, Mate. First Snape being there, then her parent's basically abandoning her alone with him. And never ca-" Their voices faded into rumble amongst all the other voices as I walked farther and farther away.

* * *

'_Dear Miss Hermione Jean Granger,' _I began reading again as I sat in the quite, lonely and cool Potions classroom, hugging myself with one arm and pinching my lips closed tightly together.

'_I am sorry that it has taken so long for me to contact you, but I fear that if I do not now then I never will be able to will myself to do so again, and that, other than giving you up, I would regret it for the rest of my life. I also fear that if I tell you who I am this early in the letter you will discard it and dismiss it into the nearest trash bin after tearing it apart and crinkling it in small wads, if not setting it to flame. _

_I know that I said I gave you up, and, if you are as smart as I have heard, than you already know that that means Hugo and Rose Granger are not your birth parents. But myself, and the man who raped me nearly eighteen years ago are. _

_To start things off, I must tell you that I will not sugar coat things, and I will not hold anything back. I have no fear about giving you too much at once as I have already waited too long to tell you any of this… so, here I go._

_You were my first child, and giving you up, was both painful and necessary. And, because of having to give you up, and my husband's faith and trust in me, we decided to get pregnant immediately after I had you. I knew it would be hard to do, to have another child knowing I would never get to hold, or even talk to, my first. But when my son was born, it made me realize what a mistake I had made in ever giving you up, but, as any good Mother and wife does, I kept this knowledge to myself. Until now. I gave my son as much love and admiration as I had in me, and through loving him, I was, in a way, hoping to send some to you as well. _

_I gave you the name Hermione because it had been my sister's name, my sister who had not made it past her first day of life. My other sister, being younger than myself and Hermione would be, has no knowledge of this. And those who did know of her have set it apart from their minds long ago. _

_(I must take a break here from my story to tell you that it was my fault for your parents' absence this summer. It was I who called them away, and, to hide the truth from you even further, they came up with yet another lie to tell you why they had to leave so suddenly. It was me, begging them to allow me to meet you, to see you for the first time in seventeen years, which kept them away. It was their constant denial of my pleas that kept them away. But now, seeing how you are of age, it is no longer their decision what you choose to do with your life, but your own. I do apologize for taking them from you in the way I did, I do hope over time you will understand why I did what I did.)_

_It was the Christmas of 1978, and everyone was drinking. It was a party where all were welcome – all whom had attended Hogwarts in the early seventies, that is - and at some point in time I had ended up alone with your biological father, or, more appropriately, the man who raped me. We were in a room filled with contemporary colored decorations and floating white and gold candles. There was a large fire crackling in the fire place, and we were seated far apart from one another along a long 'L' shaped couch. I was just past the point of being drunk, and he, having arrived to the party a good hour before myself and husband, was much more inebriated than me. _

_It started out innocent enough, saying a few words of old memories from classes and such from our school days. But then, then it was anything but innocent. He began commenting on my chest and legs, and wondering if they were any stronger than they looked. (And, of course, it being a party which would involve quite a lot of drinking, were recommended wands be left at home for safety reasons. So, needless to say, I was truly helpless.) He pulled himself drunkenly along the couch closer towards me, saying things such as, "your breasts are larger than my wife's, they look softer, too." Or, "I wonder if I can satisfy you better than your husband can, I bet I can." _

"_I always did wonder what snogging would be like with you when we were in school…" _

_I will tell you no more of his comments.'_

Tears were filled in my eyes, and my body felt cold, like ice, as I imaged hers must have as the letter went on.

'_He was on top of me then; throwing his hands down my blouse and around my hips. I tried to scream out, but his lips were on mine before I was even able to let out the slightest of hollers. _

_I gathered all of the strength I had and shoved him off of me, and ran from the couch. But he was up and his hands ripping at the tail of my jacket just as soon as I had gotten up. I kicked backwards at him, but my efforts made no difference. I was on the ground, and he atop me, bashing my head against the ground until I was so dizzy I couldn't see a thing straight. _

_He laughed then, and ripped my blouse open and began kissing my neck and collar bone, and fondling my breasts roughly with his hands. And after what seemed an eternity of that, he unzipped my skirt and pulled it up past my naval, where he then ripped my panties like they were mere parchment. I had been begging him and fighting him the whole time, but all he did was accept it as a challenge, and become more and more violent. _

_(I will tell you no further detail, as it gets too graphic for even myself to speak of, let alone think back on.)_

_After he had finished… I was bleeding and bruised and disoriented as I went looking for my husband, and when he saw me, it was as if he hadn't had one drop to drink. He sobered up so quickly… _

_We went home after that, and I found out I was pregnant with you five days later. _

_I will tell you now who I am, and who the man who raped me was. _

_My name is Narcissa Malfoy, and the man who rapped me was James Potter._

_You are half brother to my son, Draco, and to James and Lily Potter's only child, Harry. You are not a muggle born, my dear, but a full-blood witch. I am sorry you had to find out this way, but I could think of no other way to make you believe me other than telling you the honest and brutal truth. I will never lie to you. And though you have never met me, I love you. I have loved you since the moment you were born, regardless of how you came into this world. You have been, and always will be, my little girl. _

_Love always, and with regards and sorrows,_

_-Narcissa Malfoy_

_P.S. I would be honored if one day you would do me the greatest gift of letting me meet you.'_

I slowly folded the letter up and slid it into my bag with trembling hands.

TBC


	9. Detention

**Inside**

Chapter Eight: Detention

**Hermione's POV**

"Crookshanks!" I continued as my close-minded Himalayan jumped and ran round the tub, screaming for his freedom and splashing water in every which way. "I know you don't like this, but you're filthy! And you are going to get this bath whether or not you like it! Which, obviously, you don't! But I am your Mummy and you will do as I command! Now, hold still you great wet boy!"

The letter sat beside me, folded up and placed back into the envelope in which it had arrived with a dozen water splashes covering it. I had read it no less than six times, yet each time was as if I were reading it for the first time; never ceasing to make me cry, to shake and be filled with chills and trembles. I still couldn't believe it, yet, at the same time, how could I help but not believe it? The story Narcissa had written out for me seemed too vulgar, too crude and graphic to ever have been thought up. But James; Harry's Dad, _my _Dad… he can't have ever done that… he simply can't have…

"Alright," I declared as I allowed Crookshanks to spring forth from the tub and land effortlessly beside me. "You're all finished now. Would you like to run about as you are, all wet and cold and filled with mats. Or will you let me brush and dry you off for once?

"Yes, that's what I thought." I sighed as I watched him trot away without a second glance. "But you best be headed to Gryffindor Tower, lest you get a cat-cold and freeze to death. There'll be a fire going, lie beside it and let it warm and dry you." I knew I sounded crazy, talking to my cat with such calmness and confidence in the words I was saying. But he really did understand me, because as he was about to head left, he quickly changed his mind and took a sharp right, heading towards Gryffindor Tower.

I shook my head as I lifted the stopper from the tub and watched for a few moments as the water began to filter out. I then picked myself up, along with my letter from Narcissa, bag, and bottle of honey-oatmeal shampoo I had used on Crookshanks, and his unused brush and towel. As I was making my way in the same direction of him, I quickly turned on heel as I slammed my free hand against my forehead in stupidity for forgetting my robe, button-up and tie.

As I bent down to pick my forgotten clothes up off the ground I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror, and my, was I a sight.

My hair was a strewn in all directions and somehow even puffier than usual. My standard white undershirt was soaked to the point of becoming a new layer of skin, making my royal purple bra all but too noticeable, and my skirt, as wet as it was, had become so dark it was nearly ebony. And, if that weren't enough, it stuck to my thighs so stubbornly that it moved as they moved, inching up and up with each step. My feet were bare of course, having experienced one too many times the wrath of a wet floor caused by Crookshanks, and, in turn, having nearly cracked my head open more than a dozen times. Bare feet seemed the safer choice.

"Miss Granger," I screamed and tumbled backwards; papers and clothes flying everywhere as I lost my balance from fright and banged my head harshly onto the side of the tub. "Well I must say you had it coming!" Professor McGonagall continued sternly, "First walking out during Professor Dumbledore's speech, then not showing up to any of your classes on your first day! Not one! Now I know you've been through a lot, with Draco Malfoy harming you the way he did. But honestly Miss Granger is that truly a reason for this sudden change of character? You have been my best student for the past five years; best in my house even! Never missing a class, always turning in your assignments early and flawless in quality!

"Now, please, before I assign you your detention for all of this, tell me what brought on this madness!"

"I was giving Crookshanks a bath, Professor." I said lamely as I pulled myself back up to my feet. "I must have lost track of time."

"Lost track of time? Really, you don't say? Well, as a matter of fact when I spoke to Miss Brown, Miss Turpin and Miss Weasley they told me another story, saying that you looked quite down and were sitting before the fire in Gryffindor Common Room, sulking and ignoring everyone when they told you class was to begin. Now I know you did in fact make it to your Potions class, but as I have heard it from several of the student body and Professor Slughorn himself you left just moments before he made his introduction speech for the class. Never to be seen again. Until now.

"Now I know you went through a great deal this summer as well as here, but I am forced to do no less than take fifteen points from Gryffindor and give you three days detention."

"If you please Professor, I had my reasons for my behavior today."

"Oh? And what may those reasons be?"

"I'm sorry…" I told her hesitantly, "I can't."

"Miss Granger, I have always been more, _slack_, with Mister Potter and Weasley and yourself, always. And you three have always been honest with me, never lying or withholding information from me. And in turn, I have kept your secrets and hoped that you would continue with your obvious trust towards me. But now, it seems I have lost that.

"You are to begin your detention tonight with Professor Snape, in his class - with your fellow troublemakers - as soon as you have dried off and changed into dry clothes. I will tell him to expect you in no less than ten minutes. I'll see you in class tomorrow. Good evening."

* * *

"Ron?" I asked as I took my seat behind him, "Harry? What on earth are the two of you doing in here?"

"Well I'm glad to see you're here." Ron said quietly.

"Why ever would you say that, that wasn't very ni-"

"He means it with affection." Harry cut me off from the seat beside me. "We're in here because we spent the whole of the day looking for you. We missed all our classes and got five points each taken from Gryffindor, and two days of detention."

"You guys shouldn't have done that. But, if it makes you feel any better I've landed myself in three days, and got fifteen points from Gryffindor."

"Don't worry about it Hermione. We went looking for you because we were worried about you. You can't have honestly believed that we'd buy into your concern this morning about your timetable; we've known you far too long. We knew something else was up, we thought if we found you you might let us help." Ron said as he turned his head slightly and looked back at me. "We're here now Hermione, no one else is around… tell us what's bothering you. Please."

"I can't… and…" I paused suddenly confused as I looked around the room. "We are alone aren't we? Where is Snape?"

"In his office… _writing out our punishments_." Ron shook his head. "He'll be out soon I expect to give them to us."

"And indeed I am." Snape spoke up suddenly, standing in the front of the room looking down at us. "Mister Potter if you will come with me."

"This ought to be good." Harry whispered as he pushed himself up with his hands and marched off towards Professor Snape.

"What's he doing, why'd he have Harry go off with him like that?" I asked as I leaned forward and whispered into Ron's ear.

"Donno, probably wants to read us our punishments in private." Ron suggested as he turned his head to the side to face me, where he then took his eyes from mine and allowed them to drift down to my lips where he rested them for a moment or two before looking back to my eyes. "I was worried about you. Tell me what's wrong; let me help you, 'Mione." He whispered softly as he began slowly leaning his lips towards mine.

I pulled myself away from him and folded my hands in my lap before saying, "I told you Ron, I can't do that. It's something I must face on my own."

"Mister Weasley, if you please." Snape said as he repapered with Harry scornfully walking away from him, a thick book in one hand and roll of parchment in the other.

"What did he assign for you?"

"Ah ah, Mister Potter. I'll have you take a seat at the far end of the classroom, opposite end from the door, if you will."

"They're equal distances from the door Professor. Which one do you mean?" Harry asked stiffly as he stood stiffly beside me.

"Pick one." Snape said as he moved his eyes down to the parchment held tightly in Harry's hand. "This way, Mister Weasley." And he disappeared again with Ron followed closely at his heel.

"What did he give you?" I hissed softly across the room to Harry who sat with his arms crossed over his chest and eyes looking at the book before him.

"I don't know." He shrugged, "He just gave me a speech about how like my Father I am and how much of a slacker I am, then handed me the book and parchment and sent me on my way."

"What? That's weird." Harry simply raised his eyebrows and rolled his eyes.

I wanted then more than ever to show him the letter from Narcissa Malfoy, to show him that Snape can't have been too far off at how horrible his, _our_, Father was. But I knew I couldn't… I just couldn't.

I bit my tongue and the tears that stung at the back of my eyes stilled.

"Miss Granger," Snape's voice sounded as Ron's footsteps approached me loudly. I looked up to see him carrying a book more than twice the size of Harry's and at least three times the amount of parchment.

"Yes, Professor," I said, keeping my head down as I forced myself away from my seat and towards him.

My arm brushed against the side of his stomach as I passed him saying, "Now Mister Weasley, surly we can pick a seat with a better window view than that?

"Yes, much better. I will return in a moment to tell you your punishments. Until then, no talking."

I heard the door close softly as I faced the back of his office with my arms folded tightly across my chest.

"Now Miss Granger," He began as he walked towards me; his footsteps filled in my ears. "I hear that you missed each of your classes today, though this is not unusual news, it is unusual to hear that it was you."

"Yes," I said, biting my lip and barley able to hold in the tears any longer. "That's true." I told him as I slowly turned myself to look up at him, "What is my punishment, Professor?"

"Nothing." He told me simply as he took another step towards me.

"What?"

"Nothing," He repeated. "You are to do nothing, but sit there, and wait patiently until detention is over. Detention is, indeed, a time to punish for wrong doing, and what would torture you more than making you sit in a classroom and do nothing?"

"Not being…" I began slowly, giving into my deepest desire as the pain inside of me became all too much. "Not being able to ever be in your arms again."

"Miss Granger?"

"I know what I said before, but I didn't mean any of it. I tried, I tired to not love you, I tired to turn my feelings for you off. I kissed Ron, I made him think that I loved him, and I am sorry that I did that, it didn't mean anything, nothing. All of my love and affection inside of me is for you, regardless of how much I don't want it to be, it is and I can't change it. I just, I got some really horrible news and it made me realize some things. It was so horrible, so horrible that I couldn't face anyone all day, and that's why I was gone all day. It made me realize how alone and unhappy I have been forcing myself to be; burying my face in my books and my studies. Shutting myself off from my friends… but most of all from love. And I guess it made me realize that all of these years I haven't allowed myself to love anyone because subconsciously I knew I couldn't really trust anyone like that with my heart.

"But it also made me realize how much I want to be able to trust someone. And not just anyone, but you. I want to be able to trust you. And I really just… I need you right now. I need you always. So please, please let me be yours."

"Yes," He said as he wrapped his arms quickly around me, "You can be mine. That is all I have wanted since the moment I kissed you. I love you, Hermione. And I promise to be yours and yours alone. Forever."

I raised my head up and looked into his eyes while my hands held fast to the flaps of his robe, and his arms tightened around me, pulling me closer towards him as he leaned his head down to me, and I up to him. "I love you," I whispered one last time before our lips met.

Static raced through my lips and coursed into my spine, electrifying and awakening every part of me.

Slowly, slowly we parted; our lips reluctant to separate from one another. "It's time to start detention." He said as he slid his thumbs across my cheeks, wiping at my now-almost-dry tears. "Are you going to tell me what news upset you so?"

I looked up at him with my lips still and eyes unblinking, and through my silence, I knew he understood; I would tell him when I felt it was right.

He stepped away from me and I led the way from his office and into the quite classroom.

TBC


	10. Impossibilities and Probabilities

**Inside**

Chapter Nine: Impossibilities and Probabilities

**Hermione's POV**

"It's barbaric!" Ron bellowed as he led the way, storming angrily to the Great Hall for Breakfast. "Honestly, why'd he lay it off so easy on you!?" He shot at me as he plopped down and began piling his plate.

"Really, Ron, we've been over this. If you did your homework once in a whi-"

"Eighteen inches of parchment! It's mad! It's insane! It's impossible! He made me read a hundred page chapter, then write on it. Eighteen inches!" He repeated.

"We'll, you did do it, didn't you?"

"Of course I did! Only took me 'til the sun was coming up though! And you, you! All you had to do was sit there, doing nothing!" He scoffed. "And Harry, why'd you only get twelve inches?"

"Well my chapter was shorter; it was forty-nine pages."

"Honestly Ron, you're only letting him get to you by acting this way. Or did you forget we still all have detention again tonight with him? If he see's you acting this way about it it will only give him pleasure and in turn make him make tonight even more difficult for you."

"You know Hermione," He sighed dejectedly, "it really is annoying how right you can be sometimes."

"Yes, I can be a difficult little thing can't I?" I asked sarcastically as I gathered my bag about my shoulder.

"Where you headed off to?" Ron asked with his mouth full. "You haven't even ate anything yet."

"I'm not really hungry," I told him. "And besides, seeing as I have _two_ more nights of detention and McGonagall watching me like a hawk I figured I better get to class early. Even if I do hate the damn Professor that teaches it."

"What, Slughorn? Why?" Harry asked after he wiped his lips and set down his mug of pumpkin juice.

"Ha! Don't even mention his name!" I screeched.

"He's the reason she nearly bled to death." Ron mumbled through another mouthful of biscuits and gravy.

"Well thanks for sugar coating it Ron!"

"It's what happened isn't it?" He asked after swallowing. "Yeah, he got all pale and awkward when he saw Hermione's arm; the blood. It's the reason Snape had to help her instead. She's had a problem with old Slugho- the new Potions teacher ever since." He quickly said, seeing my angered expression.

"Yes, that's what happened." I nodded before turning to face Harry. "The old bastard who calls himself a teacher panicked and backed away in a dire situation.

"Anyways, I've got to get going. See you in class."

* * *

_Dear Narcissa, _I began while taking in a deep breath,

_I am sorry it has taken me so long to respond to you; as everything you told me was so much to absorb. _

_I have never met you before, yet alone do I even know what you look like. And yet, what you told me, as impossible as it sounds, and how much I don't want to believe it… I can't help but to believe it. I would not expect a stranger such as yourself would make up something so vile and crude and, frankly, bold. _

_Of course I want to meet you; you are, after all, my birth Mother. _

_And Draco and Harry… I can hardly believe they are my brothers. But as I did a bit of digging, after I read your letter for the first time, I did discover that Draco was born on 19 June 1980… exactly nine months after I was born. And my being a full blooded witch, it is quite a change. As if the whole of my life before I received your letter was a lie. Why didn't my parents tell me I was adopted? And, they are muggles, so, why did you choose them as my parents? Why not give me up to a magical family? _

_I am sorry; I am asking you too many questions… I am just so nervous._

_Class is to start soon, and I want to be able to write this and send it immediately. But before I do… how am I to go about informing Harry, and Draco, that I am their sister? Harry has believed for so long that his Father was a wonderful man, and if I were to tell him otherwise… oh, he would hate me! I know he would! And I could never live with that…_

_Please write back as soon as you can._

_Love, _

_-Hermione Granger_

I folded the letter and slid it smoothly into the properly addressed envelope entitled '_Narcissa Malfoy' _and shoved it neatly into my inside robe pocket. Then, looking at the clock and seeing I had exactly four minutes until class started, decided against my own better judgment and bolted off as fast as I could out of the classroom, past walking, talking students and headed towards the Owlery.

"Oh!" I heard a familiar female voice fume. "_Miss Granger!_" Professor McGonagall proclaimed with obvious shock in her tone. "Class is about to begin! Where is it do you think you are going!?"

"I'll be back!" I shouted, not slowing my pace nor looking back. "I promise! Won't miss a word!"

"_No you don't!_" I heard her voice boom. "You two are in _enough_ trouble as it is, let _her_ make _her own_ for _once_!"

"But Professor!" Harry and Ron complained in unison as I forced my pace to quicken.

I ripped the letter quickly from my pocket and handed it to the beak of the first owl I saw, and said quickly as I could, "Narcissa Malfoy!" It made a hissy and irritated gesture and seemed to be about to drop the letter, so I added quickly. "I am in a hurry! I will give you three mice for this when you return!" Its attitude quickly changed and off it was, and, following in sync, I quickly descended back down the stone steps and rushed off towards Potions.

The stitch in my side worsened and burned with each step, but I refused to give in and rushed at what seemed to be lightening speed.

"Told you!" I said breathlessly as I passed a shocked and impatient looking Professor McGonagall and bounded into the Potions classroom with a mere three seconds to spare.

"Glad you could join us, Miss-?" Slughorn said with a wide smile on his irritatingly goofy face.

"Gran- Gran- Grang-" I breathed loudly, falling into my seat and dropping my head backwards.

"Granger, Professor." Ron told him.

"Yes," I breathed quickly, "That."

"Where were you?" Ron hissed, leaning towards me with an irritated look playing about his face.

"Does it matter?" I whispered as softly as I could, which came out as no less than an inside voice. "I made it in time, didn't I?" Smiling and looking over at him, he shook his head and dropped his eyes down to his desk, his hands balled into fists at his sides.

* * *

"Honestly, Miss Granger!" McGonagall continued as I sat silently before her desk, looking over at her with innocent eyes. "What was it that was so important, that couldn't wait, that you nearly missed yet _another_ class for?"

"Professor, I don't see what the problem is; I made it in time, didn't I?" I asked her seriously.

"Yes, you did, Miss Granger, but that is not the point! The point is that you went rushing off like that! And yes, your speed was impressive… however; I am going to have to give you another detention."

"What!?" I bellowed, shooting up from my seat. "Why! By what means!? I made it to class on time, I didn't miss anything! Nothing! He hadn't even begun his introductions yet! You have no grounds for this! This is ridiculous! I've done nothing wrong!"

"_Sit down, _Miss Granger." Obediently, reluctantly, I obliged. "Though you did make it to class on time, you shouldn't have left in the first place. Whatever it was you had to do could have waited until after classes were finished. I am sure it wasn't so dire you had to do it so soon. Surly you could have waited."

"No, Professor, it couldn't have. I had to get to the Owlery to send a letter, it can't have waited. And it was, as much as you protest to the contrary, dire."

"And still you will not tell me what all of this is about?" She asked after a moment. Slowly, I shook my head.

She let out a short sigh and drummed her fingertips along her desk. "Very well, I will give it to you this once, Miss Granger, but only this once. I expect you to, from now on, be to each of your classes no less than two minutes early. I will speak to each of your teacher's personally to see that you do this. Understood?"

"Yes, Professor." I nodded.

"Very good. You may go."

* * *

"She _what_?" Harry asked skeptically after I had explained to him and Ron of my discussion with McGonagall as we walked side-by-side-by-side to detention.

"It's mad! Man Hermione, she's really got it out for you this year, McGonagall has." Ron shook his head.

"Yes, well, I'll just have to be a bit sneakier from now on is all."

"Alright, that's it!" Harry demanded as he stopped, holding his arm out to block me from going any further. "Tell us what is going on Hermione, we are your friends! We care about you, and since our first year here we have been a trio. Don't break it now, not when we're so close, let us in."

I took a moment to find my words as he and Ron looked at me longingly. "Alright, you're right, I'm sorry I didn't let you in on it sooner. It was just… just so much to absorb.

"Remember how my parents took off this past summer, not to return, or even get a hold of me?" I asked them, and they both nodded. "Well… that's because they aren't really my parents, I found out I was adopted, and, I've been so secretive because I've been in contact with my birth Mother; we've been writing letters. Or, more, I've only just responded to her this morning."

"Oh, that's… well, who's your birth Mother?" Harry went on.

"I'm sorry, Harry, I… I can't…" I told him softly, with pain in my heart from having to hide such important information from my own brother. "But we're going to be late, we need to keep going." And, pushing his arm away, I marched on.

TBC


	11. Her Response

**Inside**

Chapter Ten: Her Response

**Hermione's POV**

"A what?" I asked again, looking wide eyed at the thin book before me.

"A novel, Miss Granger." Severus went on as he stood before me, a humored (and loving) look in his eyes. "I couldn't help but notice your reading choices, all being that of History, Biography, Autobiography, Philosophy… not once have I seen you bury yourself in a book written purely for entertainment purposes."

"No, no I haven't." I said, baffled. "Books aren't supposed to be meaningless; they are supposed to be for knowledge and knowledge alone! Informational. Not… not, _this._" I said, picking up the book and looking down at it hopelessly.

I could tell he was suppressing a laugh as he went on. "I think, then, seeing your reaction to it, I have chosen this task wisely for your second session of detention."

"No, oh, God, no… please, not this… anything but this…"

"It has been settled, Miss Granger. Read the first seven chapters, including Prologue, and write me ten inches of parchment of what you have… _absorbed._"

"_Ten!?_" Ron bellowed. "That's not fair! Yesterday you gave Harry and me-"

"Silence, Mister Weasley," Severus said as he pulled his attention slowly from me and aimed it towards Ron. "As I have not yet given you your assignment, that was rather foolish of you, wasn't it?

"And so, seeing your sheer, utter, dislike of yesterday's sentence, today we ought to see what we can do to continue with that trend, shall we?" He stepped sideways from before me and made his way towards the back of the room, where Ron sat, seemingly nervous. "Though I must admit, Mister Weasley, I was surprised at how well you achieved your assignment… I can't help but wonder if you've been holding back on me this entire time…

"So after careful consideration, I have decided that today, instead of reading merely one chapter, you are to read two, chapters eleven and twelve, and write me not eighteen inches of parchment, but twenty-one." I heard Ron squeal out as Severus continued with humor in his voice. "Yes, I think that will work out quite well indeed.

"And you, Mister Potter, today I think we may continue with the same trend as Mister Weasley. Read chapters thirteen, fourteen and fifteen, and nineteen inches of parchment. You may begin."

The boys both groaned out with pain in their tones as they began flipping to their proper pages. I, however, merely looked down at the cover before me. A pale girl with platinum blond hair looking fearful from the attic window of a house colored grey, silver and red. The title was bold and printed in white: V.C. Andrews _Flowers in the Attic_

As I flipped open the front cover bright red filled my eyes as I began reading yet another bit written in white: _'Way upstairs there are four secrets hidden. Blond, beautiful, innocent little secrets- struggling to stay alive... _

I moved my eyes away from the text to see the girl from the front cover still there, only now she was surrounded by what seemed to be an older brother, just as blond and pale, and two younger siblings, a girl and boy (all dressed in white). Behind them was what appeared to be a ghost of an old man with his hands outstretched towards them, though his eyes were intent on me and seemed to be murderous?

_Righteous Anger . . .  
Innocent Fear . . ._

I jumped up as a sudden loud and persistent rapping sounded against the window, bringing me back to reality.

"What's this?" Severus said as he stood from behind his desk and headed towards the window with a both curious and irritable look about his face. "This better be impor-"

The owl, bearing a parchment envelope in its mouth, flew and landed right atop the book I was sentenced to read. It dropped the letter into my hands and I looked at my name written in the familiar handwriting of Narcissa.

"This is not a time for social calls, Miss Granger." Severus sighed as I looked back up at him, the owl flying away happily for delivering the letter correctly. "This is, as I have made clear, a time for punishment. I am sorry but I will have to hold onto that until after tonight is over. You may retrieve it from me tomorrow after class."

"I can't." I told him, sliding the letter safely into the inside pocket of my skirt, having sewn it there secretly.

"Beg pardon?" He asked with raised eyebrows as he moved his hands to rest in balls against his hips.

"You can't have it." I told him again.

"My office, Miss Granger. Now." He told me as I nodded and stood. "You two had better have read half of your assignment by the time I return. No talking, or I'll double both essays and readings."

* * *

"I'm sorry," I told him after he had entered the room behind me and closed the door securely. "I know this is detention, I didn't mean to get her response now. I sent her a letter earli-"

He silenced me by placing his forefinger against my lips. "It's alright." He told me softly. "Is this the matter concerning the news you told me of?" I nodded. "Then go on and open it, I don't want you to have to wait. Bust you mustn't make it look like you still have it as you leave my office. Take your time."

_My dearest Hermione, _I read after carefully opening the envelope and discarding of it on the table beside me,

_Before I answer any of your questions I have to tell you that the mere sight of your handwriting alone brought tears to my eyes. It is so beautiful. _

_The reason I did not give you up to a magical family was because I didn't want anything traced back to me, or James, of what had happened. Adoption within magical families is much more complicated than that of muggles. I asked your parents to not tell you of your being adopted, I felt it would make you hate me fore giving you up, and I never wanted that. I knew that when the time was right, and when you were old enough, I would be able to tell you what really happened, and in my heart I knew you would understand and that you would not hate me. _

_As for telling Draco and Harry of this, I was hoping that we could do so together. And, saying that, I have been informed of what Draco did to you on the first day, and I can tell you with confidence that he will be punished for it. Regardless of you being my daughter or not, I did not raise my son to harm others, and I will make that very clear to him when I see him again. _

_Harry will not hate you. If anything, I believe that he will be in denial for a time. But, after he has thought about it, really thought, he will know what we tell him is the truth. Alcohol is not good, Hermione, I only hope you do not have to learn that the hard way as I did. No one should have to._

_I am free to meet you any time of any day, and, being an alumni of Hogwarts, I know that Hogsmeade Village is not far from you. Please respond with a date, and time, and I will be there._

_Love from,_

_-Narcissa Malfoy_

_P.S. I know that we shouldn't put off telling Draco or Harry about your relation, but I would love it if we would be able to meet once, or twice, alone before bringing others into it. Also, I have enclosed to you a gift. It is a gold ring bearing the image of Georgiana Cavendish, Duchess of Devonshire. I know she was a muggle, but during my time at Hogwarts I took a class about Muggle Studies, and she was one of the finest monarch's of English muggle history, and I couldn't help but remember her story all through my adulthood. What she did for her children, even in face of true love, is truly heroic. She is a role model of mine, of sorts. (I do hope it fits!)_

_I hope to hear from you soon. _

I folded the letter up and reached back into the envelope and pulled out a small dark purple velvet bag, which I had overlooked before, containing the gold ring. I looked down upon it and smiled. It was very beautiful. I then slid it along my right index finger and filled with warmth inside, as it was both a perfect fit and a gift from my birth Mother.

"Thank you," I said softly as I peeled my eyes from my new shinning ring and looked up into Severus's eyes.

"You never need thank me for allowing you to do something so important to you, Hermione." He told me as he stepped towards me and cupped my face between his hands. "That ring is beautiful."

"Yes," I told him as I brought my hand back up to look at it once more. "Yes it is… my Mother bought it for me." I told him breathlessly, stepping back with my eyes diverted downwards. "My whole life I've been cocky enough to admit and tell people I know most of everything, which, as I grew older, I knew was far from the truth. And, quite the opposite I fear.

"Ever since I was little I knew there was something wrong, something that wasn't quite right." I went on as I looked back up at him. "I felt… _different_, out of place amongst my own family. If I were sad, it would rain, if I were happy the sun would always shine. And when I'd be drawing pictures of princesses or reading about _The Sleeping Beauty _or _Snow White _I'd look up and suddenly there would be a rainbow. If I was talking about a certain song as we were driving along in the car it would suddenly play from the radio.

"My parents would always look at me curiously, but dismiss these things. Saying it was always a coincidence, even as I would go running towards them calling out, 'Mummy! Daddy! Look, I made it rain!' Or, 'The princess in my book made a rainbow grow!' or, 'The man in the radio studio played the song for me!

"I just… I never connected the dots. And how could I? What reason would I ever have to make me think that my parent's weren't really mine? Or, more, to think that I wasn't theirs?

"I've always seen the good in everybody, no matter how much bad they have shown me. And all those times you have insulted Harry's Father, I have always been the one to calm him down afterwards and tell him that everyone sees people differently. That the James _you_ remembered was exactly how you had described, but, isn't this time, now, the time to be mean? And stupid? And foolish? You never spoke with James Potter after school, I assume, so how could you possible know what kind of person he really was? Other than that which he showed you he was at school…

"How much I wish my thesis was correct." I said as I closed my eyes and wrapped my arms around myself comfortingly.

I heard his steps before I felt his hands. "What you say is often true, don't doubt yourself. As I hardly am the person I was when I attended here as a student, as I am sure you will also change after you leave here."

I puckered my lips together tightly before going on. "He raped her." I admitted. "The man I always have defended… the man I _never_ knew. Harry's Father… _My_ Father… he raped her!"

"James?" He asked, stunned as he looked down at me with shocked eyes. "James Potter raped-?"

"My Mother," I inhaled, "Narcissa Malfoy. Yes, I am the half sister of both Harry and Draco. And the niggle of it all? Neither of them know! I am a pure blood witch! Brought into this world by a drunken and stupid man and a woman who could hardly defend herself! God!" I nearly screamed. "I am not even meant to be alive! And yet she… she… she wants nothing more than to meet me, to be with me again and to be able to hold me and hear my voice! Why? Why would she want to meet the _one _thing, the _one reminder_ of what happened to her all of those years ago? I am nothing but a tragic reminder and an insignificant mistake! Why would she want to meet _that_?"

"Hermione," he said softly as he wrapped me up in his arms tightly; silent tears once again streaming down my face as the realization of it all hit me like a swift blow to the gut. _Why would she want to meet me? The only reason I even exist is because she was raped, I am the product of her rape! The product of hate and anger and lust and desire and fear and pain and agony! _"Don't ever say anything like that again, you are not insignificant. Nor are you a mistake, if you had never happened I would have never had that chance to feel what love was.

"Without you there would be no one to constantly butt in and speak out of turn about a recently asked question. And Mr. Weasley would be one friend short, as well as Mr. Potter. Though, you are his sister, I am sure he adm-"

"Why are you being like this?" I asked him. "My whole time I've been to this school you've been nothing but mean to me, and, well, I to you.

"I know I asked you this in the summer, but, I just… I don't think I understand anything anymore."

He grabbed my hand and pulled me beside him and placed me gently in his seat behind his desk and dropped down to both his knees, holding my hands in his. "Because I never knew who you were; I never knew how amazing of a person you were. I had always thought you to be irritatingly smart and unable to keep quiet… But as I stayed with you over the summer my eyes were opened to an entirely new you. I saw as we cooked together you could be funny, and silly, and still be a child. And when you were simply walking about the house, I saw how beautiful you had become; how simple and happy you could be by just glancing at a photograph.

"How you can be elegant, in everything you do. Even as you fell to the floor after I had spilled all that water, you did it with an elegance I have never before seen. And the way your breathing always changes with your emotions…

"So tell me, Hermione, how can something –_someone_, be such a mistake '_an insignificant mistake_' if they are as perfect and flawless as you?" He asked me as I squeezed his hands with mine. "A person so caring and smart, so beautiful and patient, so understanding and… _perfect_.

"But most of all, because I love you."

I collapsed into his lap, my lips falling passionately on his.

TBC


	12. The Meeting

**Inside**

Chapter Eleven: The Meeting

**Hermione's POV**

"It's bloody cold in here!" Ron announced again as he stomped his feet to the ground and began rubbing his mitted hands up and down his arms. "Are they ever going to light that fire?"

"I donno," I responded with equal – if not more - chill filled shivers. "But for the meantime we'll just have to make do, I'm sure she'll be here soon. You can go when she is; oh Ron don't look at me that way! I've told you more than a dozen times you didn't have to come! And besides, I won't tell you who she is anyways."

"And I've told you that I'm not leaving you alone, don't you remember what happened last time we were here? With Malfoy? Yeah, _now_ I've got your attention. Just because he's not allowed to be in the same room with you at school doesn't mean he can't when he's out of it. And yes I know his rights to be allowed to visit Hogsmeade were banned but I've heard from sticky-ears Seamus that his Father wasn't too happy about that and so he's now allowed an hour every time we have a trip."

"Oh, honestly Ron, when are you ever going to let that go? It was an accident! And besides, his wands' been taken away, remember?"

"Yes, I do remember," he said worriedly, "But," he added softly as he slid in closer beside me on the bench, "But that doesn't mean he can't get one of his _groupies_ to do his dirty work for him."

"Really?" I asked him in a false surprised manner. "Really, Ron, Really? Honestly, do you really think that he'd risk something so stupid and low as that? Do you really think he'd risk getting himself into any more trouble as to get himself even more days of which he would be wandless?"

"Well, no, but still. You can never be too careful, especially when it's Malfoy who's involved. And yourself."

"Please Ron; I can take perfect care of myself." I told him while shaking my head and hugging myself tightly with my chin tucked into the top part of my jacket.

"Yeah, tell that to your arm."

"Ronald! How d-"

"How dare I bring up something that you had no knowledge was even to happen? How dare I say you've no way of protecting yourself against something you can't even see coming?" He asked. "Yeah, right, you can take care of yourself." He added sarcastically.

"No." I told him. "I was actually going to say how dare you bring up such a painful memory, but I think you made your point perfectly clear. Besides," I said, standing up with my arms still wrapped around myself, "I've got to go, so you can go on and think up more points about how I am defenseless to criticize me about later. See you later."

"Hermione, don't, I didn't mean it like-"

"Whatever," I said bitterly while walking towards the door and away from him, "She's arrived."

* * *

My hands shook as I stood staring at the numbers etched into the door before me, though it was not from the cold.

I inhaled a deep breath and closed my eyes before raising my gloved hand to the door in a fist and knocking five times; my eyes opening slowly and air leaving my lungs at the same pace as my heart hammered quickly in my chest. _Why am I so nervous? _I wondered as I listened to the sounds of her footsteps approaching the door. _It's not as if she's a _complete _stranger. She is my Mother after all, and we have exchanged several letters to each other…_

"Hello, Hermione," she smiled with both her hands about the door; one grasping at the wood, the other clutched softly around the handle - a look of both happiness and nervousness plain on her face.

"Hi," I said stupidly while fumbling my hands together as she took small steps towards me, until at last her arms were wrapped around me, pulling me against her with affection only a Mother could have towards her daughter, and I instantly felt trust towards her and wrapped my arms around her just as eagerly.

"Please, come in," she asked after we had parted and she stepped backwards to open the door wider for my entry. "I know its awful downstairs, they do this every few decades or so. "_Preserving the firewood_ they say, well, I say people are cold and we are surrounded by more than enough trees. And magic, at that."

I smiled sweetly as I passed her, pulling off my gloves and scarf as I looked over at the tall flames erupting from the fireplace. My cheeks and lungs filled with heat as she helped me slide off my jacket, and then vest. "You say they do this every so often? Not light the fireplace downstairs I mean, why?"

She rolled her eyes as she pulled out a generously stuffed chair for me to sit in. "Merlin only knows. But, if you ask me they are simply too lazy and more concerned about their own well-being than others."

"But that doesn't make any sense, without fires there are sure to be far less customers, aren't there?" I asked as I pulled my sleeves halfway down my hands and watched as she took her own place at the small table beside me.

"Remember, it was only a guess." She smiled sweetly as she scooted herself in and looked over at me; taking my hands and cupping them in hers. "My, you certainly are beautiful."

"Thank you," I said awkwardly, not used to such blatant comments on myself.

"You're welcome, though you need not thank me, I was stating a fact."

Looking down at our hands entwined, I smiled before going on. "Sorry, but, why did you want to meet me? I don't mean to be rude, I'm happy that you did. I just… it doesn't make sense that you would want to meet me? I mean, after the way I was conceived, and everything."

"I knew that you might ask me such a thing," she sighed before taking a hand away from mine to pick up and scoot her chair closer towards mine. "Hermione, as crazy as it sounds, the moment I found out I was pregnant with you, I was in love with you.

"To me you are not a reminder of tragedy, but of beauty. The fact that something so wonderful, something so innocent and so pure could come out of something so ugly, it makes me know that there is still light within the dark. For why else would you have come to me? Why else would I have conceived you in the first place, and carried you for all those months? Surly not as a constant reminder of what happened, or as a way to torment me.

"Few people knew that I was pregnant, and even fewer knew how it had happened. And those people asked, demanded that I abort you, that I get rid of you. Before you even had a chance to make it in the world. But I simply told them no, for I had made up my mind.

"I would have you, yet I would not keep you. I would give you to a kind muggle family, completely unaware and unknowing of the magical world. Having no knowledge of how you happened, and in doing so knowing that one day I would have you back, that I would be able to see you again.

"I knew from the start that you were perfect. That you were a girl and that you would be beautiful and smart and charming… No, I could never take away your chance at life before you even had a chance to live. Nor would I take away the beauty and love you would give to people in it. I could never rob the world of that.

"No, if I had not gotten pregnant I would be very much different than I am now. I would see nothing but tragedy, and you, my love, are no tragedy."

I smiled with tears stinging the base of my eyes as I slid my hands from under hers and wrapped my arms lovingly around her. "I love you," I cried while tightening my hold on her.

"I love you too," she told me softly with tears in her voice, "So very, very much Hermione."

* * *

"So are you going to see her again?" Ron asked as we sat beside each other in the dim glow of the fire. "Your Mum I mean."

"Yes, the next trip to Hogsmeade." I told him before folding my hands into my lap.

"That's cool, so you two hit it off I take it?"

"Yes, she is so much better than I could have imagined Ron, I truly love her."

"That's good," he nodded. "I mean, she is your Mother, you haven't seen her since the day you were born, but it's good you still have that connection with her."

"Yeah," I smiled, "Yeah, it is.

"I mean it was a bit awkward at first, but as soon as she had her arms around me I felt at home. A feeling my adoptive Mother has never quite been able to give me, which, up till recently, I never knew why. But now I understand how it really feels to be loved by your Mother; your real Mother."

"Yeah, I've had my Mum my whole life, so I can't really imagine what it would be like without her." He laughed softly before lacing his fingers together and looking over at the fire. "Hermione, what is this?" He added.

"What's what?" I asked him curiously.

"Us," he said. "What are we to each other?"

"Friends."

"Hermione, you kissed me, and, to be honest, I thought that meant we were together. But you've been nothing but avoidant towards me since then. I let you kiss me, hell; I've been waiting for you to do it for years. But, whenever I get close to you, or try to hold your hand or kiss you, you either lean away and change the subject or run off saying you've got something important to do."

"Well, recently I have had things to do, Ron. I've had a lot on my mind, getting in contact with my birth Mother, detention. I've been busy."

"Well, you're not busy now," he pointed out as he sat up straight with his back perpendicular to the back of the couch and looked over at me expectantly. "So maybe now we can…"

"Ron, I'm… I've got to… Ron, please don't." I said as I leaned away from his slowly approaching lips.

"Why Hermione, why?" He asked me as he slid himself closer towards me. "Why did you kiss me like you did if you didn't really want it? And why now, when we are all alone with no one to see us do you reject me still? You say you've been busy, had a lot of your mind… but all I see is you trying to avoid me."

"I'm not avoiding you; Ron, if I were then I wouldn't be here with you now, would I?" I asked him.

"Okay, avoiding my lips then." He stated.

"Yes, Ron, please don't do this." I begged him. "I kissed you, yes, but it wasn't because I… oh, please don't make me say it."

"What, Hermione?" He asked me while folding his arms over his abdomen. "Why'd you kiss me if not because you wanted it?"

"I have been," I began slowly, carefully, "I was confused, Ron. Something happened that I didn't want to, and I thought that if I kissed you things would change… but they didn't. I'm sorry I used you like that Ron, really I am. I never meant to lead you on the way I did."

"Hermione, I have known you for years." He began. "And you've always been open with me; honest. You told me about Snape staying with you last summer, about your parent's leaving… and when you came back this year I thought that it was those things that were bothering you.

"And when things got really bad you shut me – and Harry - out entirely, when all we wanted to do was help you, like we've always helped each other. I mean, it took Harry to force it out of you about what was going on, with your being adopted, but even then, after you've told us, I can't help but feel you've left some major part out of the story.

"You look at Harry differently…

"You just, you're different Hermione. And not just your personality, but your appearance as well, you look more mature and grown up, which, I guess isn't all that surprising because we're not kids anymore. But, you just… I feel like I don't even know you anymore Hermione, and that kills me. It kills me.

"I love you so much, and I know you'll never feel the same way about me, and I have finally accepted that. But that doesn't mean I don't want to be your friend, I always want to be your friend Hermione, but the way you're acting… all your secrets and sneaking around and hiding… I feel like I'm not even that anymore."

"Ron, I never knew you felt this way," I said breathlessly. "Why'd you never tell me any of this before?"

"I've tried, but you're always so busy, or distracted. You're never around anymore. I feel I've lost you."

"You haven't lost me Ron," I told him shamefully, "Though you are right, I haven't been being honest with you; not fully.

"And I'm sorry I can't be, Ron, please don't look at me like that… You know I would be if I could be. It's just… what events took place to my being adopted is all very complicated and tragic. I am not keeping it from you to hurt you Ron; I am keeping it from you to keep what happened in the past _in the past_, where it needs to stay.

"So I am sorry if I am hurting you so badly Ron, but what I keep from you I keep from you for a reason… but know that I won't keep it from you forever. Just long enough to be able to handle it… to be able to know everything before I tell you anything, because I am just as tired of telling you half truths as you are hearing them from me." I reached out for his hand and squeezed it in mine, softly, to reassure him that I would always be there, and smiled.

"Promise?" He asked me with a strain in his voice.

"I _promise_." I told him before he leaned into me and pulled me into his arms, and he into mine.

"I trust you."

"Thank you Ron."

TBC


	13. Siblings- Part I

**Inside**

Chapter Twelve: Siblings- Part I

**Hermione's POV**

_The rest of September passed by, and before I knew it we were headed into November, and then, it was December. And along with the holiday came a meeting that would change everything…_

"You want me to meet your Mother?" Harry asked as he looked up at me from his place on the couch.

"Yes." I nodded once with my hands crossed behind my back.

"Why?" He asked. "Now, don't get me wrong Hermione, I'd love to meet her, it's just… I mean, have you asked Ron to come along as well?"

"No," I told him as I slowly sat down beside him. "I haven't, and, Harry, I'm not going to."

"So it's just going to be us then?"

"No, well, sort of. Harry, please hear me out. It is sort of important that you meet her, you see, she… we… you and I… we're…"

"What is it Hermione?"

"Just come with me tomorrow, please. Please, Harry, you don't understand how important it is to me. And, if you do come everything will be explained."

"Alright," He agreed after a moment with a sigh. "But Ron's not going to be happy about being left out."

"I know that, but as much as I care about him, he really can't come."

"And I take it you won't be telling me until afterwards why?" I nodded. "Okay, well, have fun telling Ron… because I'm not going to do it."

"No," I said sarcastically, "Of course you're not."

* * *

"Ron, I promise you, I _promise_ you, I will tell you everything when we get back." I pleaded with him.

"Why can't I just come?" He pleaded with his hands shoved deep in the front pockets of his jeans and his back leaning against the wall.

"Because, Ron, because you…"

"Because…?"

"Because you just can't!" I cried out. "Ron, I'm sorry, but you can't!

"When we get back everything will be explained to you, every little detail! I'll tell you myself! And when you find out the whole truth then, then you will understand why it has taken me so long to tell you, but I just can't tell you anymore than that until after tomorrow. I'm sorry."

He took in a big breath that expanded his chest before walking away, leaving me alone in the empty and dim corridor.

_Ron! _I wanted to call out, but stopped myself before I had even gathered enough breath to.

* * *

"Am I a bad person?" I asked from the window seat later on in Severus's office as we sat snuggled together; I in his lap with his arms wrapped around me securely.

"Why would you ask that?" He wondered softly before leaning his cheek down and resting it atop my head.

"Because I feel like one," I told him honestly. "I can't tell Ron or Harry anything, I feel like all I am doing is lying to them, like I can't even be their true friend. They ask me something I either have to tell them a complete lie of just a pinch off the truth. I can't be honest with them about anything; other than what I've completed from my classes."

"You're not a bad person Hermione, you're just doing what you feel is right. By not telling them the truth you are protecting yourself and your Mother. And also Harry's pride for his Father, which, is not exactly deserved, but he holds onto it with all of him."

"I know," I said as I closed my eyes and slanted my head back to face the ceiling. "And all of that is going to be taken from him tomorrow, all of it. Every time he has ever stood up for his Father is going to be shot to hell… all the good, positive things he has ever said. Oh, Severus, I am going to take all of that away from him, he is going to hate me! He'll never want to see me again, let alone speak to me.

"I am just so torn with this entire thing. A part of me wants to go through with all of it, the truth and all, but then there's this other part of me that wants to just pretend it never happened. That Hugo and Rose really are my parents, and not James and Narcissa. That I'm an only child, muggle born, simple… but I know I can't. I know that it has to happen, I just wish it didn't have to be with Harry… _or Draco_."

"You will be fine, Hermione, you are the strongest person I know, with friends and without." He told me while lacing his fingers within mine and hugging me tightly. "I know that it is going to be hard, but just know that you will get through it, in time, and that I will be here whenever you need me."

"I love you," I breathed as I pulled the covers up closer to my chin with my free hand before cupping it around his forearm and bringing his hand to my lips and keeping them there for a long moment.

"I love you," He responded back softly while leaning down to kiss the side of my head and pulling me closer towards him; tighter.

My eyes drooped down slowly with the feeling of his lips against my skin.

_**the next day . . .**_

"First of all," Narcissa began after the four of us had gather around the table; Harry and me beside each other, Narcissa across from us and Draco to the left of me and opposite Harry, "I must apologize, I know that it is only Hermione and myself who knows why we are all here… Harry, I know we have never met before. And, without saying too much too soon I know you know from Hermione who I am to her."

"Yes," Harry said, "You're her-"

"Please, Harry, allow me to do the talking right now." She cut him off. "I don't mean to sound rude, but I need to be the main speaker; for what I am about to reveal to you, to all of you - except Hermione, of course - will be very shocking."

"Mother, what's going on?" Draco wondered with a quizzical look.

"Patients, Draco," She smiled at him before reaching out to squeeze his hand. "All of your questions will be answered shortly."

The four of us sat in silence for a moment, exchanging awkward glances every now and again, until, at last, she began telling the story of which I had heard a dozen times over again.

Draco's face went from red to white, and from white to red; his fists clenching and relaxing. I sat in wonderment and anticipation at how they would react, but, mostly, how Harry would take it, or if he would even let himself accept it. His Adam's Apple moved up and down slowly as his eyes stood still in their sockets, not blinking once. His breathing stayed rhythmic, steady for the longest time.

I kept my focus on him as she continued, moving it every so often to Draco, and to her.

"And so, Hugo and Rose are not her parent's, but the couple I chose for her, the couple who I believed would care for her best."

"She's-" Draco choked while looking over at our Mother, "She's my sister?

"I have a sister?" He added, this time looking at me in a whole new light.

"Yes, Draco, she is your half sister." Narcissa smiled as a small tear left the corner of her eye, "And Harry's."

"NO!" Harry boomed; sending the chair he had been sitting in reeling backwards with a swift kick and the three of us jumping in surprise. "YOU LYING BITCH!"

"Harry!" I cried, "Harry, please," I begged him. "She's not-"

"SHUT UP HERMIONE!" He shot at me. "YOU!" He barked again with his attention back towards Narcissa. "You bloody damn LIAR! My Dad DID NOT RAPE YOU! You lying idiot!"

"NEVER SPEAK TO MY MOTHER IN THAT WAY!" Draco boomed as he too shot up; I clapped my hands over my mouth from the animosity of the scene before me.

"You said that everyone at the party was drinking! INCLUDING YOU!" He went on, ignoring Draco's comment. "No! NO!" He hollered before throwing open the door and leaving, slamming it shut with full force; his screams sounding all the way through the hall until at last another door slammed, and he was outside.

"Hermione," Narcissa said softly. "I am so sorry you had to see that, please forgive me."

"No," I told her through a choked voice. "You don't need to apologize, he's always - he's always been so proud of his Father; I knew he wouldn't believe it. I just knew… I knew he wouldn't take it well. He'll never speak to me again…" I closed my eyes and bit my bottom lip harshly and began sobbing at how much hatred he had shown me. I didn't know how I had gotten there, but the hard floor was pressed against my knees and the chair I had been sitting in was knocked on to its side and behind me.

I was crying so hard I could barley breathe, and the next thing I knew I was gathered in a pair of arms and rocked back and forth rhythmically; a pair I had never before felt.

"I'm sorry too Hermione," Draco apologized as he pulled me into his lap. "So, so sorry… So _bloody_ sorry…"

I don't know if it was the knowledge of us both knowing we were related, but all the hatred I had once had for him dissipated and I felt instantly safe; loved in a way I had never before felt.

I snaked my arms around him and hugged him tightly as I continued sobbing against his comforting shoulder, with the sound of his voice cooing over and over, "It's alright Hermione… it's alright… you're okay… you're okay… everything will be fine… I'm here… I'm not going anywhere."

TBC


	14. Siblings- Part II

**Inside**

Chapter Thirteen: Siblings- Part II

**Hermione's POV**

"What's happened?" Ron asked as he kicked himself away from the wall he'd been leaning against as I made my way back to the castle. "I tried to talk to Harry, but he just ignored me and kept on walking… I've never seen him look so mad.

"What is it?" He asked when I didn't respond. "Hermione, what is it?"

* * *

"Wow," He sighed after I had finished telling him everything I had been keeping from him. "I can't believe James, Harry's Dad… _your _Dad would do that. I mean, Harry's always been so found of him.

"And Draco? I mean really, Malfoy? There's something you don't hear everyday. I bet he's going to be even more of a bully now, huh?"

"Actually, no." I told him with a shake of the head. "Quite the opposite actually; after Harry had left, I was crying… and he held me."

"Held you?" He asked with wide eyes. "Draco? Draco Malfoy? We are talking about the same person here aren't we?"

"Yes, the same Draco Malfoy as always," I assured him, "I don't know if it's a sudden bond that has linked us together, but, he didn't let me go until I had stopped crying, completely. And before he took his arms away from me he kissed my forehead and told me if I needed anything to come to him; that he'd be there and I could count on him.

"He apologized for everything; he even kissed my arm a dozen times over the scars."

"Merlin," Ron huffed, "And I thought my family was complicated."

"The world's full of surprises," I shrugged. "And, Ron, do me a favor?"

"Anything."

"Please don't tell Ginny… or your Mum."

He laughed while reaching out to hug me, "I promise."

* * *

"I just can't _believe_ it still!" Ron scoffed in bewilderment later on in the Great Hall as he filled his plate with dinner food. "Draco Malfoy, Malfoy; Narcissa, the whole thing just blows my mind. And Harry too! James! Poor Lily, I wonder if she kne-"

"Ron!" I hissed; looking around to see if anyone had been listening. "Please, I asked you to keep it from your Mother and Ginny, that doesn't mean you have to go about telling the rest of the world just because I left them off the list!"

"What? Oh, right, sorry." He said while slowing down his shoveling. "It's just hard to absorb."

"Sure, you say that." I huffed. "And here I thought _I_ was the one who had a lot to take in."

"Right," He cleared his throat. "Sorry."

"It's alright, Ronald. Just please stop bringing it up every five minutes."

"I'll do my best," He admitted. "Anyways, where's Harry? I haven't seen him all day."

"I don't know." I agreed as I gave my full attention to my surroundings, and seeing him nowhere, added softly, "Perhaps he's off writing a letter to Dumbledore, you know, anonymous. Dumbledore always seems to know everything, even if it doesn't involve him. He could be in a whole nother dimension and still he knows everything."

"I know," He whispered back with his eyebrows drawn in together; fear playing about his eyes, "Does concern a man…"

"What?" I asked, taken aback.

"Uh, no- nothing, nothing!" He said before shoving a spoonful of steak and mashed potatoes and gravy into his ready mouth.

"You mean making me do your homework, don't you?" I asked fearfully.

"Fine!" He nodded with a full mouth. "Fine!"

I remained suspicious the remainder of the meal.

* * *

"I think that's him," I whispered to Ron as we walked subtly past him into the Common Room, where I saw him sitting alone by the fireplace. "In the chair."

"Yeah, yeah it is," Ron agreed, "Let's go."

"No!" I stopped him in a hushed whispered while grabbing his arm. "We'd better wait until everyone else has gone to bed, as to not cause a scene or anything like that. He doesn't look too well."

"Oh, you're probably right. How's a game of chess?"

"Ron you know I'm not any good at that." I told him humouredly.

"Yeah, gives me enthusiasm to do something with you if I know I'm better."

I rolled my eyes before agreeing.

* * *

I sat silently in an old wooden rocker (after loosing a grand total of sixteen games) in the far end of the room; in a corner behind where Harry sat as I waited for the rest of the Gryffindors to go to bed. Ron, having already become too impatient and too tired to wait any longer to confront him, said his goodbyes and was one of those to have already retired. I waited unseen; patient.

* * *

"Harry?" I asked as the last few sleepy people walked past me and headed to their dormitories. "Harry, I haven't seen you all day. I've been worried, so has Ron."

Nothing.

"Harry, please," I began as I approached his lone silhouette sitting dismally in the loveseat beside the fire. "Talk to me, you haven't said a word to me since this morning."

"I've nothing to say to you, so, if you please. I want to be alone." He said rudely with his eyes glued to the fire.

"Harry," I ignored his request, "when I first found this out all I told people was that I wanted to be alone, when, really, I was already alone; I can't have wanted to be around my friends; you and Ron, more than ever.

"Finding out I wasn't an only child, and from different parents, at that. Being told that the people I thought my whole life to be my parent's weren't… I thought I'd die if I didn't have anyone to help me though it. And, Harry, though I pushed them aside, I did have people; friends, people I loved to be with me. Let me be there; here, let me be here for you. Please, Ron and I want to help you, we know you're going through a lot, so let us share the burden."

"What burden?" He asked suddenly. "Hermione, my Dad didn't _rape_ Narcissa Malfoy… he would have never done that. Never. He loved my Mum, he loved me, we are all he needed."

"Harry," I went on. "You never even knew your Dad, so who's to say he didn't? And besides, you weren't even born yet, let alone conceive-"

"Just drop it Hermione!" He shouted suddenly. "You're wrong! She's wrong! My Dad didn't do those things to her! He can't have! She's lying; I can't believe you actually fell for it… I thought you were the smartest person in the whole school."

"I've never claimed to be," I said, taken aback and hurt. "And yes, I do believe her, Harry. Because my parents; Rose and Hugo, did go away during the summer, and I didn't hear from them… I still haven't.

"And besides, you think I actually want to believe her? You think I really want to believe people can do such things to other people? No, Harry, I don't! I did consider that she could be lying at a time, but then, I asked myself how someone could come up with such an extreme and crude story… graphic."

"No," He shook his head. "No, Hermione, just… no. He didn't do it. I won't believe it." He huffed before crossing his arms over his chest and looking back towards the fire.

"Harry, your Dad, _our_ Dad, he did rape her. If you'll just listen, _and really listen_, to what she has to say. People don't just make up stories like that because they are bored Harry… she is telling the truth. I am your sister, he did ra-"

"NO!" He shouted suddenly; enraged and shooting up from his chair and looking down at me with eyes filled with fire. "SHUT UP! YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING, DO YOU? SO STOP BEING SO DAMN STUPID AND GET YOUR OWN LIFE AND STOP INTERFERING IN MINE! YOU DAMN, STUPID, STUPID WOMAN! YOU'RE WRONG! WRONG HERMIONE, WRONG!"

"SHUT IT HARRY!" Ron screamed as he appeared from the stairway. "HOW DARE YOU! YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO GOT BAD NEWS! SO WHAT YOUR DAD WASN'T THE GREAT HERO GUY YOU THOUGHT HE WAS! SO WHAT HE TURNED OUT TO BE EXACTLY WHAT SNAPE'S SAID ABOUT HIM ALL THESE YEARS! HE RAPED HERMIONE'S MUM, YOU BLIND IDIOT!"

"HE DID NOT!" Harry barked back. "SHE'S NO PROOF! WE HAVE A TESTIMONY OF ONE WOMAN, ONE STUPID WOMAN!"

"Harry, Ron, please!" I cried as I got up to stand between them, but was thrown back almost instantly as Harry's fist slammed against my cheek, and then his foot against my gut.

"YOU STAY OUT OF THIS!" He shouted. "IT'S JUST AS MUCH YOUR FAULT AS HERS!"

"YOU BASTARD!" Ron shot as he bounded towards Harry and decked him harshly across the side of his face. "HOW DARE YOU HIT HER? HOW DARE YOU! YOU STUPID, DUMB, LAME, BLIND IDIOT! YOU MONSTER! HOW DARE YOU BLAME HER FOR ANY OF THIS!"

"GET – OFF – ME- !" Harry demanded as he slammed his own head against Ron's; sending Ron rolling off of him, disoriented and paler that usual as he placed his hand against his forehead.

"Ron," I moaned, "Ron, are you alright?" I asked him as I began scooting myself across the floor towards him.

"Fine!" He said loudly before climbing back onto his feet to face Harry once more.

"YOU WON'T BE!" Harry went on as if nothing had happened, "NOT WHEN I'M FINISHED WITH YOU!

"YOU UNLOYAL BASTARD!" He added as Ron ducked another of his punches. "YOU SAID YOU'D ALWAYS BE MY FRIEND; MY BEST FRIEND! ALWAYS BE THERE FOR ME! YOU TURNED YOUR BACK ON ME THE MOMENT HERMIONE TOLD YOU WHAT SHE THINKS HAPPENED; YOU'RE SO DAMN IN LOVE WITH HER YOU'LL BELIEVE ANYTHING SHE SAYS! YOU BLIND, BLIND IDIOT!"

"I'M NOT THE ONE WHO'S BLIND!"

"DAMMIT HARRY!" I screamed as I ran forwards at top speed to shove him down. "LISTEN TO REASON FOR ONCE! YOU THICK-HEADED FOOL!"

"GET OFF HERMIONE!" He screamed as we wrestled along the floor. "YOU BITCH, GET OFF!"

"HERMIONE!" Ron yelled as he jumped towards us, but I ignored him as I fought to protect myself from Harry's sudden assaults.

"OUCH!" I cried as Harry's fist once again found my face, this time landing against the side of my lips. "HARRY! PLEASE! I'M YOUR SISTER; YOUR FRIEND!"

"YOU ARE NOT!" He screamed. "YOU'RE NOTHING TO ME! NOTHING!"

"HARRY POTTER!" Ron screamed as I felt Harry ripped from me; but not soon enough to stop another swift blow to my rip cage, and I screamed out in pain; blood spurting from my mouth. "STOP IT RIGHT NOW! HIT HER AGAIN I'LL KILL YOU!"

"NOT IF I KILL YOU FIRST YOU BASTARD!"

"HARRY!" Ron yelled, "HARRY; STOP!"

"SEPARATE IMMEDIATELY!" The voice of McGonagall commanded. "NOW! NOW! MR. POTTER AND WEASLEY! MR. FINNIG-"

The rest of what she shouted faded into blackness along with everything before me as a hard blow landed between my eyes.

* * *

**Severus's POV**

I stood with one hand resting stiffly against my desk and the other cupped tightly around my side; staring at him sitting there with a hollow and distant expression on his face. Rage was pulsing through me with every heartbeat as the memory played again and again in my mind of Hermione lying on the floor, bloody and bruised and unconscious, and being able to do nothing about it.

I'd kill him myself if I could for what he had done; strike him once, that's all I needed, make him feel what he made her feel. Make him see what it felt to have someone bigger and stronger attack him… but I knew I couldn't, and so, I did the next best thing.

_Punishment._

"Professor McGonagall is speechless," I began, "She is unable to even look at you, Mr. Potter. And so, knowing our relationship as she does, she has put on my shoulders the honor of giving you your proper punishment."

"Please, Professor Snape, I didn't mean any of it. Not any of it, I was just so… so… so mad! I never meant to hit her, but, once I did… I couldn't stop."

"Miss Granger now lays unconscious in the Hospital wing; five cracked ribs, a sprained wrist, dislocated shoulder, and covered from head to toe in bruises. And Mr. Weasley, seeing as he is stronger and less fragile than she, lies beside her with half of that, though he is not unconscious."

"I… what?" He asked seemingly confused and shocked. "No," he shook his head, "No, Hermione, she can't be… she… she isn't…"

"She is not dead, Mr. Potter," I snapped. "Though after all the times the three of you have shown up after doing Merlin knows what, I have never seen her so injured. And at your hand. And, also, I almost regret to tell you that neither of them will be able to go home this holiday, as their injuries are too serious."

He ran his hands through his hair as he dropped his head downwards and began immediately sobbing; his shoulders shaking with each sob. "What have I done?" He mumbled. "What have I done?"

"Would you like a play-by-play, or the simple truth?" I asked him without a drop of sympathy in me. "Though, if you would like my opinion I can give you both."

"Neither!" He cried. "Neither! Just tell me my punishment and have done with it!"

"Very well," I said as I strode across the room towards him. "You are to give me your wand, to begin with." I commanded as I held out my hand and watched as he fumbled klutzily inside his pocket for his wand. "Very good," I told him as I clutched my hand tightly around it; it was all I could do to stop myself snapping it into shreds. "Next: as badly as I wish to expel you Professor McGonagall has banned me from it, and, so, I have picked the next best option.

"You are to spend the remained of the year suspended off campus. Normally I would allow a student to stay with Professor Hagrid, but, seeing your closeness I have overlooked that privilege.

"No, you are to be sent back to your Aunt and Uncles, where you will remain until the start of next year, where you will then be given back your wand and complete your sixth year. And, seeing how it is only December, you will be unable to Graduate until the next year. This is to say, a year later than Mr. Weasley and Miss Granger."

"Can I," He chocked, "Can I see them, first? Ron and Hermione; I have to apologize… I have to-"

"I don't think that will be necessary." I cut him off. "Your bags have been packed and are waiting for you by the front entrance, where a carriage is to pick you up in an hours' time, and take you to the train station where you will then be taken back to Platform 9¾. It has been arranged for your Aunt and Uncle to meet you there, and take you home, and keep you there until September of next."

He stood without speaking and rushed past me, leaving with the same silence in which he had come.

* * *

**Hermione's POV**

"Hey," Ron's voice said softly as I opened my eyes to find myself on a stiff cot in the dim Hospital Wing. "I was starting to wonder if you'd ever wake."

"Where," I said dizzily, "Where's Harry?"

"I don't know, but I don't think he's on the grounds anymore." He told me. "After you were knocked out McGonagall did some sort of summoning charm and Dumbledore showed up with Snape, Sprout and Flitwick; though Flitwick wasn't much help, he just sort of stood there, his size and all…

"McGonagall ran to you and Snape and Sprout ran to contain Harry. I did hear them talking though, and I don't think we'll see him for a while; Snape is the one to punish him. McGonagall was just sick; couldn't even look at him."

"What happened?" I asked while attempting to turn to face him, but flinched with pain and pressed my hand against my rips and winced in pain.

"Yeah… he got you pretty bad…

"Well, I heard the two of you talking; heatedly it sounded. So I came down to the Common Room and-"

"No," I said, "I know why it happened; I mean what happened to Harry? I've never seen him so angry; so upset and full of rage. It was like he was possessed."

"Oh, that, yeah… I don't know. He was just so proud of whom his Father was, or, who he thought he was… he just couldn't accept it I guess."

"But he hit me Ron," I said with tears threatening to fall, but I held them back. "And you, he yelled at us…

"Ron, have we lost him?"

"Yeah, Hermione…" He said sadly, "Yeah, I'd say so… I'd say so."

I closed my eyes and let the tears fall freely as his voice sounded in my ears, "Where is she? Let me see her! Damn you woman! Damn you! Let me see my sister!"

Madam Pomfrey must have become temporarily paralyzed due to shock, as a pair of fast and loud footsteps came towards me quickly, and I opened my eyes to find Draco rushing towards me.

"I heard yelling and gasps coming from every part of the castle and footsteps above Slytherin Common Room and I knew you must've been involved… Oh, Hermione, what happened?"

"Harry's what happened." Ron told him. "Bloody idiot, he-"

"Thanks very much Weasley but I think I asked my sister," Draco cut him off. "Hermione?" He asked softly.

"No," I sniffed, "No, it's alright, Ron knows everything. Harry just… he… he blew up!

"I just went to talk to him because he hadn't said a word to me all day and he… he just…"

"Hit her," Ron cut in. "After screaming at her. She was just trying to get us to stop, mind you, I did walk in on them talking; Harry went off the roof. I was trying to protect her, he was calling her all sorts of things I've never heard him even say before. And, as you can see, there was a bit more than words exchanged by the end." He said, pointing to his face.

"Where is he?" Draco asked.

"Donno," Ron sighed. "They took him away as they were taking Hermione and me up here, last I saw he was headed off with Snape."

"Good," Draco said as he took a seat beside me on my cot and took my hand in his. "Just so long as that _bastard _stays the hell away from my sister."

"You two really did bond all of the sudden," Ron wondered aloud. "Huh, wonder if that would happen if Ginny and I were separated for a while?"

"Ron!" I shouted; shocked that he'd think of such a thing at a time like this.

"What?" He asked, oblivious as usual. "It is a curious thing to wonder." He mumbled more to himself than anything.

Draco and I looked at each other with wide, amazed eyes.

TBC


	15. Cool

**Inside**

Chapter Fourteen: Cool

**Hermione's POV**

My eyes fluttered open early the next morning; the sun was only just beginning to rise over the horizon. I could feel a deep ache all over my body, and was reminded all too soon that what had happened with Harry was real, and not just something in my dreams; a fear played out subconsciously, but as real as me and everything around me.

I tried to sit up, but instead fell back instantly onto the bed, a high pitch screech escaping my lips on its own. My ribs were screaming, my shoulder pounding; matching my racing heart, and wrist so sore the thought of cutting it off was not far from my mind. Everything hurt, _everything_. There was nowhere that I could not feel pain. It was cruel, what Madam Pomfrey had done, not giving me any potions, but instead making me heal, quote, _"naturally,"_ saying that the amount of injuries I have versus the amount of potions I would have to take to heal fully would do nothing but make me sick. Sick? I wanted to ask her, potions were for healing – well, in this case, anyway – not for making your body more ill. I had half a mind to think McGonagall put her up to it… Honestly, what that woman had against me this term I did not know.

It was not as if personal lives were compatible with our lives at school; sure, we had to live on campus for the year, but that didn't mean the two always had to mesh. Why Professor McGonagall seemed so keen to butt into every little detail of my life – school and personal - I did not know, but it was seriously starting to annoy me. Not everything having to do with my personal life had only to do with me. There was me, of course, but there was also Narcissa, Draco, Harry and Severus, and revealing my personal life to her would also reveal their parts in it, and frankly, sharing my personal life was undesirable enough, sharing theirs was even less so: it wasn't fully mine to share, nor was it her business to hear about.

A sudden snort and grunt, followed by a holler of pain, reminded me I was not alone.

"Bloody hell!" Ron gasped, sitting up with wide eyes. "Forgot for a minute there."

"Forgot what?" unexpectedly, and quite regrettably, he screamed. My voice scared him, and his scream scared me, and I jerked automatically, sending ripples of condensed pain all throughout my body. Another screech escaped my lips as my body filled with white hot, freezing pain. "Ronald!" I moaned. "Don't do that!" I pleaded with my eyes squeezed shut.

"Well bloody hell!" He complained, "I don't do that? You don't do that first!"

"What are you talking about, I didn't do anything!"

"You talked, I wasn't expecting to hear a voice… sorry."

"No, it's not your fault, Madam Pomfrey is unreasonable… Forgot what?" I asked, referring to his early statement.

"Forgot? He asked, "Oh, yeah, that… I forgot it was Harry who put us here, not the spiders."

"Spiders?" I asked, opening my eyes and turning my head to face him. "What spiders? Ron, there aren't any spiders…"

"For you there aren't, but for me they've been there for years, always haunting my dreams… This time they had bread pudding and were trying to get me to play a game of Quidditch with them. Only, when I said no, they had the Bludger attack me like it did Harry in second year; chased me all the way to Hogsmeade. I got into Honey Dukes, but they found me in the cellar just as I was about to climb into the secret passageway back to the school, as well as the Bludger… I never thought I was going to wake from that one, seemed to go on forever it did."

"Actually I think I'd prefer that reality." I decided after a moment.

"Are you mad!?" He whaled. "We're talking about spiders here, Hermione! Spiders, you know, eight legged monsters?"

"Yes Ron, I know perfectly well what a spider i-"

"Big enough for Hagrid to ride on, they were! Playing Quidditch, Quidditch! And they had bread pudding… do spiders even eat bread pudding, or can they?" he wondered, "They chased me for miles!" I should have learned by now: nothing, nothing could get through to Ron when spiders were involved… even, it turns out, getting the living shit beat out of you and put in the Hospital Wing by your best friend…

"Sure they can!" Came Hagrid's voice as he made his way towards us. "they get big 'nough, they can eat anything they put their mind to, even one of us, even me!" he went on as he stopped between the two of our beds. A smile spread across my face at the sight of him, and Ron seemed to cower deeper and deeper into his covers as he sank back to his mattress.

"No they can't…" he whimpered. "They can't, can they? You're lying, aren't you? Nothing's big enough to eat you…" Hagrid frowned and focused his attention towards me.

"How you doin' there, Hermione?" He asked with concern clear in his voice and expression.

"Better than some," I sighed, looking over at Ron.

"Aye that," he agreed, looking over at our trembling redhead. "But really? How are ya?" he asked, looking back at me.

Choosing words as my last option, I closed my eyes and reopened them, shaking my head.

"Still can't believe it," he nodded. "Wouldn't at firs'… had to come see the two of ya fer myself. Would've come las' night, had I been told when it happen.

"I jus' can't believe Harry'd do something like he did, beatin' on the two of ya… what happen made him do it?"

"Ah, dear Hagrid," Dumbledore said as he strode down the floor, Professor McGonagall and Severus close behind him. "I quite thought you would try to make it here to see your favorites this morning. I was not mistaken, I see."

"'Course I came ta see 'em, Professor Dumbledore, Sir, affer what happen, that is, anyone who cared would come, you ask me."

"Of course," Dumbledore agreed. "Though, I may say others would have waited until the sun had risen all the way, though, as it appears Miss Granger and Mister Weasley appear awake… Somewhat." He added, looking over at Ron. "I see he has had a difficult time absorbing this all, as I understand, it was not a pleasant night."

"No," I shook me head. "I mean, no, it's not that…" I said, looking over at Ron. "Spiders."

"Spiders?" Dumbledore asked curiously. "Magnificent creatures; both unsuspected and mysterious."

"Can we please talk about something else?" Ron whimpered, seeming to have regained himself somewhat… _somewhat_.

"Of course," Dumbledore nodded. "The topic of spiders seems to both be upsetting Mister Weasley and is, to say the least, quite random. As it is, there is another reason we have come in here this morning, as I assume and don't doubt you both already know why, especially seeing as it is the reason the two of you are here in the first place, and that is to discuss your friend – if you still wish to call him that – Mister Potter, and his recent violent actions towards the two of you."

"Where is he?" Ron asked, pulling himself up to sit and wrap his arms around his knees. "Everything was so chaotic last night, I remember him leaving, but at the same time it was hard to focus on anything…" he trailed.

"As you are quite right, it was indeed chaotic… Mister Potter will be spending the remained of the school year at home with his cousin and Aunt and Uncle. It seems he will be quite unable to come back after an explosion such as the magnitude of last night. You may write him, if you like, though, weather or not he will respond, I can not say. Nor can I say if that was too bold an assessment to suggest you write him in the first place?" Ron and I looked at each other silently, then down at our laps. "As I had assumed. I would like to ask, then, if it is not too soon after, what made Mister Potter act in a such a way as last night?

"Forgive me, I do not intend to open such a fresh wound as this one – knowing the answer may further prevent anything of this nature from occurring in the future."

"I really don't think it'll be a problem anytime soon," I said, more to myself than anyone.

"And why is that, may I ask?" he wondered, taking a seat on a chair he had pulled up between the ends of our cots'. He folded his leg up over his opposite knee and placed his cupped hands on his knee. Professor McGonagall stood at the side of Ron's bed, and Severus at mine. I wanted so badly to sit up and crawl over to him and have him hold me, kiss me, tell me he loved me… but I knew that would be both impossible because of the pain, and completely and utterly stupid due to the lack of aloneness we currently had. Still, the desire I had to ask him to lay beside me and wrap his arms around me, my back against his chest… it was hard to focus on anything else after having been through such a traumatic experience, and have the man I loved enter the room, and have to pretend we were nothing more than tolerant student and teacher… if the pain wasn't already agony enough.

The look on his face told me he was struggling with a similar – if not the same – desire. To be so close yet have to pretend to be so far apart, it killed.

"Miss Granger?" Dumbledore asked, looking over at me.

"What?' I asked, realizing I had been laying there like a mute idiot, lost in my romantic daydreams of being held by my Severus…

Dumbledore smiled, almost knowingly. I swallowed down a lump in my throat and drew my eyes away from him and back to my own hands, it were as if he could read into my eyes and see my every thought…

"I think we may have come to question you too early, it would appear." He smiled as he unfolded his leg from atop his other, and stood up. "Perhaps we will come back in a few hours, once the two of you have rested up a bit more, and have some food in you and clearer minds. So sorry to have disturbed you at such an early hour."

"Sir, if I may ask a favor?" Ron asked, clearing his throat. Dumbledore looked over at him, waiting. "It's just that, well, Hermione and I _have_ been through a lot, it's true… I can't help but think, know, really, that we'd get better rested if we were allowed to sleep in our own beds…"

"As much as I would like to allow that and oblige, Mister Weasley, unfortunately I am only Headmaster of the school, the regulations of the care of the injured or ill students rests with Madam Pomfrey." He told us. And, as if only realizing now she hadn't been around yet, began looking around the room. "And, speaking of which, where is Poppy this morning? How very unusual for her to stay isolated in her office while she has students."

"Not meaning to sound disrespectful or anything, Professor," Ron continued, pulling himself up straighter. "Should we really take her advice? I mean, look at Hermione, she didn't even give her anything for her injuries, just making her lay there and suffer…"

"As I have been informed." Dumbledore nodded, "As it is, Miss Granger's injuries are not quite severe enough to take potions for, but just annoying enough, if I may say, to cause complete discomfort."

"Discomfort?" Ron asked. "Discomfort? You call that discomfort? She has screamed twice already from being in so much pain. Well," he added. "Technically it was three times, but the last time I scared her, or no, there were a few other times after that, but I only scared her the once."

"How very odd," Dumbledore mused. "I was not informed your injuries were that severe, Miss Granger. Let me see if I can not find Poppy, won't be a minute." He said, turning on his heal with one hand at his side and the other held midway in the air. Looking at McGonagall, my earlier suspicions were confirmed, the look on her face gave it all away: she had convinced Madam Pomfrey to withhold and lie about giving me potions, she had probably thought the more pain I was in the more likely I was to reveal everything to her when she got herself alone with me, as Ron was clearly not as injured as myself. Once she was properly satisfied with my answers, she would allow Poppy to cure me, claiming I was ready to be healed all the way. I wished so much that was not the truth, but I knew already it was. _Bitch._

Dumbledore returned from Madam Pomfrey's office with Madam Pomfrey following closely behind him, a smile on both their faces. In her hands she carried three bottles of different potions. She set them down on my bedside table and began removing one of their lids; Severus looked relived and Professor McGonagall as if she could transform Madman Pomfrey into a rat. I smiled over at her, and she, with a severe look on her face, left.

"Now that that is taken care of, I shall see you both at dinner, where we may, if you are very much up for it, conclude the evening by having that discussion in my office." He did not wait for a response, but instead, knowing Ron and myself well enough by now, knew our answers already. "Good day." He smiled with a nod, and strode away. Glancing at me for a moment, Severus folded his arms behind his back and followed Dumbledore from the room.

* * *

My first thought after being healed and dismissed by Madam Pomfrey was to go directly to Severus and into his arms until dinner, but what had happened in the Hospital Wing and the look on Professor McGonagall's face would not leave me. They were haunting me, like Ron's spiders. Though, unlike Ron, I decided to face what was haunting me directly.

I stood outside her door, contemplating my options. I had been deliberating over several choices on how to confront the situation. One, I could storm into her office and demand to know what her problem with me was this year, which seemed both rude and completely out of my character – and not to mention childish – which, would, according to her claims of me, just give her more to go off with about my 'dramatic change in character', which, to be honest, I would like to avoid. Two, I could knock on her door and demand I do all the talking and ask the questions, or three, and more reasonably, I could knock on her door and try to have a calm and civilized conversation with the woman. Sighing, I raised my hand to the wood of her door, and knocked gently three times.

"Come in," came her voice through the thick door. "I have been expecting you, Miss Granger. Please," she said. "Have a seat." She removed her glasses and set them onto her desk, and folded her hands into her lap. Before I was able to open my mouth to speak, she went on. "I must begin by apologizing to you, Miss Granger, for how I have been towards you since the start of term.

"I admit, I have been a bit harsh. And I don't think I would be going too far by also saying that I have been unreasonable with you?" The look on my face must have said it all. She nodded and went on. "I am about to admit something that I may regret saying, or may say without purpose in the first place. But, nonetheless, it is how I feel, and how I can't help to feel.

"When you first arrived here this year you were immediately attacked, by an accident, I know, but nonetheless, you were indeed attacked. I immediately felt obligated to defend you, for you are not only my House but also, I like to consider, a sort of friend to me, and I hope, myself to you.

"Professor Snape stayed the Summer Holiday at your house, and I suppose something happened there that none of us could have ever expected, or saw with the furthest stretch of the imagination happening." She said, and I felt my heart stop. No, she can't… there is no way… "You developed a closeness, a bond, one might say.

"He took care of you after Mister Malfoy hit you with that blasted curse he invented, which was, to say the least, necessary, due to Professor Slughorn's lack of ability to work at a moments notice, let alone under pressure.

"I saw when I entered his room and looked upon the two of you that there was a comfort between the two of you that had never been before, and I admit, I was a bit jealous.

"I realize I am not the only Professor at the school, but I am in fact Head of Gryffindor. And being such, I had always found that the Head of House becomes closest with his or her House, and to each his or her own.

"You rushed out on Professor Dumbledore's speech, well, one of them, anyways. My first instinct was to follow you to discover why you had run off like you did, and allow you to, if you had wanted, confide in me.

"However, Professor Snape was again, there and ready along with myself.

"I allowed him to speak to you instead of myself, thinking that you would immediately turn him away and give me my chance to come and speak with you, woman-to-woman and Gryffindor-to-Gryffindor.

"However, you did not return, nor did he. Telling me you have in fact developed a sort of friendship with him, which is, while unusual, also healthy.

"It is good to develop closeness's with as many people and teachers as you can, but, Miss Granger, I can't help but feel you have shoved me aside and allowed him to take my place. And while I know that is petty of me to grow upset over, it is nonetheless the truth, to how I feel, at least.

"You have changed this year, and I can't tell what it is, but I do see a change in you. I do not see it as being for the better or worse as of what I have looked upon yet, but I have wished, and hoped, that you would confide in me some of the reasoning.

"I admit I was being a bit overly-pushy about it. One might go so far as to say I was being noisy, which, admittedly, I was. That was, until this morning, shortly after returning from the Hospital Wing, when I received two letters.

"The first being from a Narcissa Malfoy, and the second from her son and your classmate, Draco." She leaned forward and grabbed a small stack of folded parchment, undoubtedly being the letters. "Now, I think we both know what a majority of what the letters say are.

"So, that being said, I apologize, from the bottom of my heart, for treating you the way I have been, by giving you unreasonable detentions – unnecessary, I correct myself – and by assuming the worst or least, when, as it turns out, it was really never my business to butt into in the first place. I think, that if I were in your shoes, and had one of my Professors done to me what I have been doing to you, after going through what you have, I would have reacted the same way.

"As it is, my actions towards you were not as subtle as I would have liked to think they were, for if they were, I doubt I would have received a letter from your half brother and Mother, or had so many late night or early morning confrontations with Mister Weasley about it.

"I admit I have acted, to say the least, childish towards you. I have been trying to restrict your freedom and self, and apologize, and promise here and now, to never do it again.

"From now on, if I see you acting differently, or strangely, or anything other than what I am used to, I will ask only once, and if you tell me, you do. If you don't, you don't. I will bite my tongue and wait patiently for you to come around, even if you never do.

"Now, you may go about with your day in peace. There will be no reason for yourself or Mister Weasley to meet in Professor Dumbledore's office after dinner this evening, for I have all the answers we need right here, and I daresay Professor Dumbledore does as well. Still, I will show him these nonetheless, just in case I am mistaken and I am the only one who has this information.

"I must ask, though, Miss Granger, before I release you… if you forgive me for my actions."

I thought for a moment, and realizing if the roles were reversed as she said, if I were in her shoes, I probably would have done the same as well. "Yes," I told her with a smile. "Yes Professor, like yourself, I would have done the same had I had a student acting the way I have been. We're more alike than we think, I believe."

"I would like to think so," She smiled, nodding. "From what I hear, and from what I see for myself… You are not only exceptionally bright, but quite cool as well.

"I will see you at dinner, Miss Granger." I left with a humored, wide smile on my face.

_Cool_, I thought, _my Professor just called me 'cool'. And here I thought I had gone through the weirdest already. _

I could hear Professor McGonagall chuckling to herself as I pulled the door closed behind me, and began the walk to Severus's office with a smile on my face.

TBC


	16. Hermione

**Inside**

Chapter Fifteen: Hermione

**Severus's POV**

I couldn't help but wonder, as I sat behind my desk, my fingers folded in a triangle and resting against the tip of my nose, if I had gone too far on Potter? Students have, in the past, and always, had a habit of picking fights with one another. Though it was rarer to see within a single House, it was even rarer to see so violently expressed between friends, and extremely close ones at that. If it had been only Weasley, or Weasley and another student, and not my Hermione… would I have given Potter such a severe punishment as to taking away his wand for an entire year, nearly, and banned him from the school?

No, I decided, it was not. The severity of his offense was worth far much worse, and the boy came out lucky to only have his wand taken and sent back to his muggle home. He _hit_ her… _beat _her to a _bloody pulp_… Questions may have been brought up, asking why she nor Weasley did not defend themselves with their wands, or any sort of protection spell or charm, at that, or why they did not subdue Potter firstly before any of it began. The answer to that would be simple: magic is not always the first thing on your mind. If I had been there when it happened, and saw Hermione take the first assault, I would have stepped in between the two and given Potter something to really complain about. My wand would have been the furthest thing from my mind, all I would have been able to focus on would be to protect her from harm. And besides, had I gone too far with my decision to take Potter's wand and temporarily expel him from the school Albus or Minerva would have come to me by now with their feelings towards the matter.

The news Potter received about his Father would have come to a shock to anyone – Hermione herself did not believe it, or refused to let herself, for the longest time. When she finally came to me that first day of detention, asking me to have her, to keep her… it was the happiest moment of my life. I hated what she was telling me, the torment she was going through, but the fact that she couldn't go through it alone, and wanted me – needed me – to be there for her, with her, was something I never imagined possible. I was so sure after she told me we could not be together that that would be the end of it – if there was even an 'it' to begin with, aside from my kissing her in the Summer.

I stood up and walked over to my window, my hands clasped together behind my back, and looked out at the early day.

While at the time seemed incredibly impulsive and reckless, kissing her turned out to be the smartest thing I had ever done. I was so sure her response of shoving me and running away was a sign of complete and utter disgust; when truth was, she was fighting herself. _It felt like fireworks were going off inside of me, I had never felt so warm or immediately comfortable in my life. I wanted to stay there, in your embrace, I wanted to kiss you back… I wanted you to carry me to my bed and hold me while I slept… I wanted to wake up and find you there still, watching me. I wanted to spend every waking hour – and sleeping one – with you after that moment… and I hated myself for it, I didn't understand it, and it scared me. Passing you in the hallway, or kitchen… it was _agony_, I couldn't, and can't, begin to explain the turmoil that was going on inside of me. The only thing that was clear, more clear than anything has ever been in all my life, was that I had found my soul mate. You, Severus… you, who's been there all along. Just waiting beneath the surface, waiting for me to grow up, waiting for your own feelings… waiting inside, to come out and grow together, with mine._

I looked down at my hand, and clasped it within my other, remembering the sweet, tender, warm feeling of her soft caresses of her hands on mine as she confessed her heart to me; the feeling of her lips against mine and her body in my arms.

Seeing her in the Hospital Wing; the pain clear in her eyes and all too apparent on the marks covering her body… it was the worst kind of hell I had ever felt. Seeing her, laying there, all alone, and being unable to go to her. To hold her hand in mine, to kiss her forehead or even speak to her… To be unable to have laid beside her and held her close; safe. Not being able to prevent it in the first place, it was the worst of it all. Seeing her like she was, so hurt and innocent and in pain – inside and out – all I wanted to do was hold her and tell her I loved her and keep her close to me, to protect and comfort her. To hear her voice; strained and groggy, and be unable to respond to it with my own, it killed to be able to do nothing but stand there and watch and listen, silent.

Why Poppy had not given her the potions to heal her really confused me, and I made a mental note to speak to her on the matter. Subtly, of course.

I let out a sigh, and a slow series of soft knocking sounded against my door.

I turned on heel and walked to it, hoping I knew who it was already, which, without really thinking, knew. It didn't take much anymore for me to find her of for her to find me, it was as if we could feel each other.

I opened the door and found her standing there, a gentle smile on her lips and her arms wrapped around herself. Without speaking she came in as I stepped to the side, and closed the door.

"Hermione," I breathed as I pulled her into my arms and kissed the top of her head. "I am so sorry I wasn't there to stop it."

"You can't have been," she said back, hugging me to her. "Besides, it was my own fault. I was being stupid. I kept pushing."

"Pushing or not," I said, lifting her chin with my forefinger to raise her face towards mine. "He had no right, he could have killed you."

"It's just another number on the list," she shrugged, looking up at me, though I could see the hurt still in her eyes. "The number of times Harry, Ron and myself have escaped near death is quite lengthy. Though, I must say, this year it seems to be piling up a bit faster than others," her voice trailed softly, and I slid my finger away from her chin as I slowly caressed my hand up the side of her face, looking into her eyes. She slid her hand up and cupped it over mine, stepping closer to me still.

My fingertips in the base of her hairline and hand cupping her cheek, she closed her eyes and held her hand securely around mine. I stood there, holding her and watching her as she opened her eyes to look back up at me. She parted her lips slightly, and I stepped closer to her, seeming unable to get as close to her as I wanted to be – _needed_ to be. I leaned down slowly and kissed her. She sighed softly as our lips met, and slid her hand up my chest to my shoulder, where she pulled me into her. "I missed you," she whispered between kisses. "I wanted you there with me … needed you there … it hurt more than all my injuries combined … not having you with me …"

"I would have been there every moment if I could have been," I whispered back, drawing her body closer to mine. "It killed me not to have been … I needed to be with you … I needed to keep you safe … warm … loved … protected …"

"But I am," she whispered as our lips parted, and she looked up at me with a gentle smile on her face. She pushed herself up to her tip toes and reached her lips up to mine, kissing me softly. "Severus, when I am with you, that's all I feel," she leaned up as I leaned down, and we kissed again, and again. I watched in adoration as she slid her hand away from my shoulder and trailed it down my chest and stomach. Cupping her hand around mine, she brought it up to her lips and kissed it with closed eyes. After she graced my hand with a seventh kiss, she pulled it up and cupped it against her cheek, holding it beneath her own.

"So beautiful."

She opened her eyes and looked up at me, saying with her eyes what words could not express: the total and complete trust that she had in me, the comfort and happiness, the feeling of safety, love.

She slid my hand beneath hers and brought it to her lips once more, kissing the palm softly, tenderly. "Stay with me," she said softly.

"Always," I told her, wrapping my arms around her and hugging her against me. "Always," I repeated softly, gently swaying back and forth with the side of her face pressed against my chest, eyes closed, and palm resting against my chest. "You've no idea how long I've waited for you. For this. To have this," I said, one hand wrapped securely around her waist, and the other gently cupped around the back of her head. I leaned down and kissed the top of her head softly. "I love you so much, Hermione."

"I love you," she said with a gentle sigh as she curled her fingers against my chest.

* * *

**Draco's POV**

I waited in the hall, crouched down on the floor with my jacket spread across my lap, for Hermione to come from Snape's office. It seemed she had been in there all day, but still, she did not come out. What she was doing in there for so long, I had no idea, and truthfully, I didn't really care. I just wanted to see her. I needed to see her… All night I had stayed up thinking about her, unable to get even a wink of sleep. I wanted to go to her in the night and stay by her side, to hold her hand and make sure she was protected and safe. I had woken up – or more, gotten out of bed – early to do just that, and find her already gone. By the time I found her she was leaving McGonagall's office and headed to Snape's, where she had been ever since.

The most troubling part of it all, the part that really had me lost and confused, was that last night wasn't the only night I had lost sleep due to thoughts about her. It seemed ever since I discovered she was my sister I was unable to think about anything but her. In class, during meals, when I was with friends or alone… She haunted my every thought and every breath, never giving me a moment's peace.

Not that I wasn't peaceful when I thought about her. In fact, it was the most peaceful I ever felt, was when I was thinking about her. Which, to add onto my endless reign of being lost and confused, also added on a nice helping of concern: she was my sister, half sister, but still blood-sister, nonetheless. I was thinking about her as if she were just another girl… another girl I couldn't stop thinking about or following, unsuspected, around the school. Which was, to say the least, creepy.

I bent my head down and stuck it between my knees, pushing it further still with my hands. _Get it together, _I told myself, _she's your sister – your _sister_. Your blood and kin. You've the same Mother as her – you've got to stop thinking about her, at least like this. This… this _madness _has got to stop. I can't keep going about my days and nights thinking all of this is _normal._ She's Hermione – sister and once hated by me for thinking she was a muggle born. Gah! _I thought, raising my head from my knees and nearly bashing it on the stone wall I leaned against._ I can't even call her what I used to… makes me sick just to imagine thinking about it… mad beyond words to imagine someone, anyone, calling her that. She's not, she's not muggle born… she's a pure blood, like yourself… a young, friendly, _beautiful, _logical, brave, _breathtakingly gorgeous, _smart, intelligent, _elegant, mesmerizing, sexy… _Dammit! You stupid, stupid idiot! _I cursed myself, slamming my foot against the stone floor and covering my eyes with balled fists. _Sister! Brother! Brother and sister! Sister and brother – same Mother!_

"Just go away," I said aloud. "Leave me _alone! _Please…please… just _disappear…_"

"Fine then," came Hermione's sweet, angelic voic… STOP! "I didn't want to see you anyways, I'm going to Hagrid's." She spun around, and just as she was about to take another step away from me I shot up from the floor and took her wrist into my hand. We stood silent, just looking at each other; my eyes darting between her eyes and lips.

"Don't," I begged, taking a step closer towards her. "Please, I wasn't-"

"Gosh Draco," she said, pulling her arm away from my grasp. "I was only joking; I knew you weren't talking to me. Are you feeling alright?" She wondered, looking up at me with concern. She reached her hand up and gently rested her palm against my forehead, it was all I could do to stop myself from leaning into her touch. "What were you doing on the floor, anyways?" She asked, pulling her hand away from my forehead. "It's a beautiful day outside."

_Not nearly as beautiful as you are._

"I- I didn't sleep last night," I choked, rubbing the back of my head. "Perhaps I better go and lay down a while."

"Why didn't you sleep?" she wondered, looking up at me, concern back in her eyes.

"I was worried about you," I said honestly. "I didn't want anything else to happen to you."

"Oh, Draco," she said, a small smile playing about her lips. "Honestly, I know we're siblings and we should worry about each other… go get some sleep," she told me, and stretched up to her tip toes and leaned her face into mine. I subtly leaned into her as her lips pressed against my cheek, just grazing the corner of my lips. "I'll be at Hagrid's if you need me, alright?" I watched in mute silence and physical torment as she walked past me and down the corridor. I reached my hand up to touch my lips where her lips had met mine, and let out a long sigh.

_Yeah, _I thought, dropping my hand back down to my side, _I'm a goner… _

The thought seemed to come on its own accord, and I didn't care. I was done fighting it. I loved Hermione… I loved my sister. It was wrong and immoral and down right freaky, but I didn't care. How could I? The only moments I had ever felt true contentedness or happiness were when I was with her, be it holding her as she cried or being kissed on the cheek in the hall… Hermione was my happiness, and that's all that mattered. As wrong as it sounded, and wrong as it seemed… nothing ever felt so bloody _right _as when I was with her.

I turned around, tossing my jacket over my shoulder, and headed to Slytherin Common Room.

TBC

* * *

**Author's Note: **I know, what the heck, right? Well, what can I say… from the beginning this story has literally written itself, I have had little to no control over it. Without saying too much, don't you fret, constant readers, this is and will remain a Severus / Hermione romance… with a few twists and turns, of sorts. Nothing will get _too _weird, well, then I might be saying too much… ;)


	17. Breathless

**Inside**

Chapter Sixteen: Breathless

**Hermione's POV**

"Ah, Hermione!" Boomed Hagrid's happy voice as I made my way down to his yard, and found him knee-deep in murky mud in the place that he always grew his pumpkins for Halloween. "See you're alrigh' now, jus' in time to help me figure this out…"

"Figure _what _out, exactly?" I asked, looking around at the liquefied, smelly earth. "You mean you didn't do this on purpose?" I wondered, climbing onto a boulder half the size of his hut and pulled my knees up to my chest. I wrapped my arms around my legs and hugged them to my chest.

"Oh, no, I jus' though' I'd do some nice yard alterations. No! What kind of a person you think I am?" he shook his head. "Of course I didn' do this myself… trying to figure out who did and how…"

"And why it's so bloody deep!" came Ron's panicked voice as his head seemed to bob up beside Hagrid out of nowhere. His muddy hands flew out from the depth as he grabbed onto Hagrid's vest.

"Placement, Ron!" Hagrid told him. "I keep tryin' to tell him," he said, looking over at me with a helpless look on his face as he extended his hand to Ron. "He won't listen – look at him, barely a head showing and here I am jus' to my knees. I may be half giant, but I'm not that much taller than you lot," he sighed. "Well?" he asked, an expectant look on his face as Ron tried to balance himself on what looked to be firmer ground. His eyes were wide and his hands held out in from of him, there was not one spot on him – save his face, and even that had specks – that was not covered with mud.

"Well?" I asked back in response.

"You jus' gonna sit there all day lookin' pretty or you gonna help us out?"

I took a moment, contemplating. "Do I get an option C?"

"Get in!" he commanded, and I stood, shaking my head from side to side. Ron let out a feminine scream, and just as quickly was nowhere in sight. "Don't worry abou' that, not the firs' time it's happened. He'll surface back up, jus' give him a minute."

"You know, I think I have some leftover homework back at the castle… Maybe I should just go and-"

"Get you're butt in here, already!" Hagrid said, putting his balled fists on his hips and beginning to sound annoyed as the loud gasp indicating Ron had resurfaced filled my ears.

"This is terrible!" Ron cried, wiping the mud from his face. "We'll never find it, I'm going to die in here!" I watched as he doggy-paddled around Hagrid, and attempted once again to find a sold surface to stand on.

"Oh, you're jus' a great big baby, aren' you?" Hagrid asked him. "You seein' this?" He asked, pointing to Ron with his thumb.

"All too well," I nodded, folding my arms over my chest. "I think I ought to just watch from here, where it's safe…"

"It's plenty safe!" Hagrid sang. "Ron's jus' over reactin', wouldn' be the firs' time."

"Got it!" Ron shouted, balancing his hands again in front of him as he stood mid-stomach deep I the mud.

"Wha'? You found it! Great!" Hagrid smiled triumphantly.

"No! You crazy? We'll never find it! No, I found a good place to stand, this one feels more solid than before…"

"Honestly," Hagrid rolled his eyes. "Hermione, pet, get in here already, the longer we stand around arguing about getting your little rump in here the longer it's gonna take, and the bigger this mess is gonna get!"

"You mean it hasn't always been this size?" I asked.

"No, jus' started out no bigger than a babies little hand! I ignored it, then, before I knew it it was consumin' my whole yard, and I'm startin' to get nervous it'll sink the hut next." He told me. "So, would you please just stop being so stubborn and get in already?"

"Hagrid, I-" I was unable to finish my sentence as a scream filled my lungs and consumed my ears; a slimy hand gripping around my wrist and pulling me forward into the mud. I felt as Ron's other hand grabbed onto my waist and I fell forward onto him, the both of us splashing into the mud and Hagrid's voice saying, just before we were submerged entirely, "Take in a breath!"

"RONALD WEASLEY!" I screamed as I resurfaced, wiping at my burning eyes and inhaling a deep breath of fresh air. "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU JUST DID THAT!" I was covered, completely, in the mud. It wasn't until then, that I was totally covered in the stuff, that I realized the true nature of its smell: it took all I had to not loose my breakfast.

"Nicely done, Ron!" Hagrid smiled down at us. I cupped my hand and filled it with mud and tossed it aggressively at Ron's face.

"What?" he asked, wiping the mud I threw at him from his face. "Like you were going to do it yourself."

"No!" I told him. "No, I wasn't!"

"Well, then, good on me."

I kicked my feet furiously, trying to find a solid surface for them to rest on. "Now that I _am_ in here," I said, glaring at Ron as I struggled to find a place to steady myself on. "What is it were looking for, exactly?"

"It's called a Vengeance Stone," Hagrid sighed. "Or, _Justice Rock_, as the users of it like to refer to it as."

"Vengeance Stone? I've heard of those before, though I don't know much about them."

"You?" Ron asked, baffled. "You, something _you_ don't know much about?"

Ignoring him, I went on. "What is it, exactly?"

"Well, abou' what it sounds, basically," he shrugged. "Someone has a grudge agains' a person, they go out and get a Vengeance Stone. They have to charge it, of course, but once its planted it is darn near impossible to find…"

"Fine," I sighed, defeated. I was already submerged in the stuff, I might as well do what I could to help. "What does it look like?"

"Aha, that there is the key," he said, kicking his feet around slowly as he walked around in it. "It looks like a rock, or, stone, whichever term you prefer."

"A rock," I said. "We're looking for a _rock_?" I asked. "We're looking for a rock in a place filled with nothing but mud and rocks?"

"Hence the difficult part," he nodded. "Now you know why we needed an extra pair of hands."

"A rock!?" I asked again. "That's it? Just a rock, no specific shape? No difference in texture, color, size?" I wondered, trying to get as much information I could before going in blind. "There must be more than that… surly it can't just be a _rock_. I mean that just doesn't make sense."

"Well, there migh' be somethin', but I could be wrong…"

"Which is?" I asked, beginning to paddle around. "Even if its wrong, it's better than looking for a rock in a sea of mud and rocks…"

"There was somethin' I read, somethin' about sayin' it could be hot or cold. And not jus' that, but hot 'nough to melt through your hand, or cold 'nough to turn your bones to ice."

"Wonderful," I breathed. "I think I preferred the _regular_ rock theory better…" I mumbled to myself.

"Honestly Hagrid, what'd you do?" Ron gasped, clearly only resurfacing again.

"Nothin'!" Hagrid complained. "I didn't do nothin'! People jus' don't like me, s'all."

"Well, obviously Hagrid, you did do something… You must have," I said, feeling the stones with my bare feet, having decided to take my shoes off. Where they were was a different story…

"I swear! I didn' do anythin'!"

"Hagrid, people don't just _melt your yard_ over nothing. There must be something you're not telling us."

"'Right then, I suppose, maybe, I might have upset Slytherin a few weeks ago…" he said ashamedly.

"There's something new," Ron said under his breath. Hagrid raised his head and glared over at him.

"Because they've always been so pleasant, then?" he growled.

"What!?" Ron shouted.

"You're not helping…"

"_You're _the one who said _I_ overreact!" He pointed out. "You don't see _me_ destroying people's yards with a Justice Rock, do you?"

"Aha!" Hagrid declared, pointing at him. "_Justice Rock!_"

"Vengeance Stone, same difference!" Ron complained. "My point is, Hagrid, what the heck did you do!?"

"What I did doesn' matter now, does it?" Hagrid wondered.

"Never said it did!" Ron told him, splashing around. "What part of Harry, Hermione or myself have never come across anything other than noisy to you?"

"Gotta point there," Hagrid agreed, but remained silent still.

"Well?" Ron persisted. "What was it?"

"Wha' was wha'?" Hagrid asked, all innocent like.

"What you did to upset Slytherin!" Ron complained.

Hagrid, shaking his head and looking down hopelessly, looked over at me. "Awfully quie' over there, Hermione."

"Just doing what it is I was forced in here to do, which is looking for the rock, which is exactly what you two _aren't _doing," I told them. "Honestly, in all the time you two spend bickering we could have found it by now.

"Now, Ron, will you please just drop it and try to find the blasted thing? I want to get out of here…"

"Just as much as me," Ron told me from across the murk. "I'd be able to focus better if he'd just fess up already…" I could tell he meant for his last part to only be for his ears, but Hagrid and I heard it just as well as everything else he was saying.

"Alrigh' already!" Hagrid gave in, tossing his hands into the air. "I made 'em stay an extra twenty minutes in class… I told 'em if they lef' early or before my express permission tha' I'd take fifteen points from Slytherin, each student that disobeyed… Nobody did…"

"HAGRID!" Ron and I shouted in unison.

"Wha'?" he asked innocently as he kicked his feet around, putting more distance between the three of us. "They were goofin' aroun', they weren' doing their work!"

"Hagrid, they never do their work in your class!" I pointed out. "Why couldn't you have just let it go? Everyone knows how stubborn the lot is; trying to reason with a Slytherin is like trying to get beef steak from a chicken."

"She's a point," Ron agreed. "Hagrid, what were you thinking?"

"I'm jus' tired of them walkin' all over me!" Hagrid complained, moving his legs in stronger, faster strokes. "I jus' wanted to give 'em the discipline they had comin' to 'em, is all… Never though' they'd retaliate on me like this…" the sadness in his voice was heartbreaking; Hagrid loved his yard, he loved the outdoors. Doing this to him, taking away the one thing that was totally and completely his, his life and his love, was a new level of low. I made it a point to dig deeper and harder with my feet.

"We'll find it, Hagrid," I promised him. "We won't leave until we do, and if anybody tries, I'll hex them," I said, pointedly looking over at Ron. He said something under his breath, which this time I did not hear, and was glad of, seeing the look on his face was enough.

Hagrid nodded his head with a small smile. "Knew I could count on ya, Hermione."

"Let's just keep looking, alright?" I nodded. "We're not going to find anything getting all sentimental." I hissed as a piece of mud flew into my eye, and rubbed it away.

Hagrid nodded again. "Right."

* * *

**Draco's POV**

I watched as Hermione and Ron splashed around in the mud; most likely searching for the Justice Rock Pansy had planted there a few weeks ago after Hagrid gave us the ridiculous order to stay twenty minutes after class. I told her she was going too far by melting his entire yard, and she had spat back at me: "It'll only last until his hut sinks, then it'll stop. Besides," she added, "it isn't as if you actually care for him."

No, she was right, I didn't care for him, and the fact that he and Weasley had my Hermione searching around in the mud with them just added on to my non-feelings all the more: they were going on eight hours, did they really think they'd find it? And if so, wouldn't they have thought they'd find it by now? Honestly, what was keeping them in there so long?

I pulled my knees up to my chest and rested my hand on my knees, balling my fist and biting my knuckle softly. The way Weasley was being with my Hermione… I didn't like it. He was too close to her, too _friendly_. I knew they were friends, but watching as they tossed mud at each other and laughed and pulled and pushed at each other… It kindled the small fire of jealously I had inside of me, making it feed and grow and become hotter and stronger. She was _mine_, not his. She was mine, only mine, and he was playing with fire…

* * *

"It's there!" I heard her cry. "Hagrid! Hagrid, I think I've found it!"

"Wha'?" he asked. "Blimey Hermione, it's taken all day… this better be it this time…"

"It is!" she proclaimed triumphantly. "It is! Come over to me, feel it, it's warmer, feel it?" she asked. "It must be a hot stone… but how are we going to get it? It'll melt off our hands if we try to touch it, and I don't know about you, but I am awfully fond of my hands…"

"Aye tha'," he agreed as they came into clear view, and I made my way down to the mess Pansy had created. Weasley was nowhere to be seen.

"How are we going to- Draco!" Hermione sang happily, looking over at me. "Oh, I have never been so happy to see anyone in my life! Stay here!" she told Hagrid, and began paddling her way towards me. I couldn't help but smile. The sun was almost all the way down, and it was getting very dark outside. I held my hand out to pull her from the mud.

"Wha' is he doin' here!?" Hagrid bellowed, beginning to move from his place.

"Don't you dare move Hagrid!" Hermione shot back at him. The feeling of her hand in mine warmed my entire body, and I lifted her easily out of the muck. I pulled her to me and ran my hands over her arms, hair and back, trying to wipe off what mud I could.

"Enlighten us, then?" Hagrid persisted. She looked up at me, joy clear in her eyes. "Wha' is _he _doing here, and why are ya lettin' him _touch _ya?"

"It's- It's fine, Hagrid," she told him, spinning around to face him. "I will be right back!" and off she was, racing into the woods with determination clear in her bounds. I watched the empty place where she had been only moment ago, and closed my hand, keeping in the warmth from her own as long as I could, until I could be holding her again.

"Got it!" came her voice as she reappeared, a long, thick stick in her hand. "Just give me a moment…" she plopped down on the ground, laying the stick horizontally in front of her. She placed her hands on the wood and mumbled a few unintelligible whispers, and I watched as the wood shifted shape, flattening out and expanding at one end like the hollow of a bowl, at the other a fist size knob appeared. She stood, a triumphant smile on her lips, and bent down to pick up the stick she had created.

"How'd you do that?" I asked, walking over to her and looking at her handiwork. "You didn't even have your wand…"

"No, well, as it turns out," she said, lowering her voice and leaning into me. "Finding out you weren't muggle born has more than a few perks." With a smile and a wink, she jogged over to Hagrid, this time staying on the surface of solid ground, and dipped the bowl end of the stick into the mud. "Okay, I think I've got it; the stick is really heating up fast, I think the mud is masking the true heat. Get out."

"Wha'?" Hagrid asked.

"I am going to try to lift it out with the stick, and if I remember anything about these things they are very specific: Once they have been charged they only work in the place of origin, meaning, once I pull it out of the mud all the ground will solidify and go back to normal."

_Brilliant,_ I said to myself, crossing my arms over my chest. _Beautiful, brilliant… mine… _

She waited as Hagrid climbed out of the mud, wiping his hands over her legs. "This better be it," he added, standing beside her.

"It is," she told him with confidence. "I know it is. Are you ready?"

"Jus' do it already," he nodded. "Oh, WAIT!" He boomed, but was too late. Already Hermione had plucked the Justice Rock from the mud and held the stick above the mud, now completely solid dirt. Just in time to hear the loud, panicked, gasp of Weasley as his head appeared at the far end of the yard, emerging from the last few seconds of mud.

"Drop it again!" Hagrid said. "Drop it again! Do it, Hermione!" she did, but, as I knew would happen, nothing did. The ground remained firm and solid.

"RON!" Hermione screamed, dropping the stick and running towards him. "RON! Oh, _Ron!_" she had dropped back to her knees beside him. "Are you… are you alright? Ron… I am _so sorry!_ I completely forgot you were in there still…"

"Oh really?" he moaned, "I hadn't noticed… Ow… ow…"

"Oh, Ron, I'm so- Hagrid!" she cried. "Hagrid, grab a shovel, you're going to have to dig him out!" Hagrid nodded and went running off towards his hut.

"What!?" Weasley bellowed. "What!? Dig, _dig?_ Dig? Can't you just magic it to mud again and pull me out?"

"Ron, I'm afraid it's not that simple…"

"Not that simple? Oh, bloody hell… I hate it when you say that…"

"Well, look at it this way: this way I don't have to get back at you anymore, cause I already have… just now… by nearly burying you alive…"

"Get back at me!?" Weasley complained, moaning in pain. "For what!?"

"Pulling me in the mud in the first place?" he rolled his eyes and leaned his head back. "HAGRID!" he bellowed. "THAT SHOVEL _ANYTIME NOW!_"

"Got it!" he panted as he emerged from his illuminated hut and jogged towards them.

"STOP!" Hermione demanded, and Weasley screamed.

"Wha'?" Hagrid asked as he held fast in his place.

"You've almost stepped on him!" she told him. "The light from your hut, it messed with your vision."

"Oh, sorry there, Ron…" he muttered.

"Just get me out," he complained. "Now, just get me out…"

"Righ'," Hagrid nodded, and Hermione stood and looked down at Weasley, crossing her arms across her chest.

"Ron, I am really, _really _sor-"

"Just go," he told her. "You found the damn rock, now Hagrid can dig me out…" _and you can lie there being useless, as always… _Hermione stood hesitantly, and Weasley forced his head back to look up at her. "Honestly Hermione, if I come out of here I might kill you… so just go…"

"Ron, I'm-"

"Think ya migh' wanna listen to him, Hermione," Hagrid nodded vigorously. "If one of my bes' friends forgo' about me, and nearly buried me alive…" he let it hang at that, and Hermione began sauntering backwards away.

She turned around and met my gaze. I took her hand into mine as she reached me. "Let's go get you cleaned up," I sighed as I pulled her against my side, and wrapped my arm around her shoulders.

"I can't believe I just did that…" she moaned, burying her face into the crook of my arm. "I could have buried him alive, I could have killed him."

"Yes," I agreed, pulling her closer still as we walked up the darkened path to the castle. "That is the general meaning of burying someone alive; killing them." She let out a little moan and a whimper, followed by a laugh.

"What is it?" I asked, looking down at her and nearly tripping over an uprooted plant.

"Nothing, I'm just…" she sighed, burying her face deeper into my side. "Tired. You have no idea how long I was in there… and I smell like I died…"

"I've smelled worse," I told her truthfully.

"Really?" she asked hopefully. "What were you doing?" The memory came flashing back to me. The damp, dark, closed off sewer, the rot and decay of the dead animals…

"Trust me, you don't want to know."

"Fair enough," she shrugged. "Besides, knowing your past, or what I _think_ I know of it, anyways, it is probably in my best interest if I don't." I hugged her closer to my side and touched my head down to hers.

"Smart woman," I whispered softly, lifting my head away from hers and focusing back on the pathway and approaching castle.

"Really though," she said. "I look like something that came out of the Deep Lagoon."

"What?" I asked, confused. "The deep what?"

"Deep Lagoon… it's a muggle thing," she laughed.

"But you're not," I reminded her.

"I know," she nodded. "But that doesn't mean I wasn't raised as one; I still remember everything."

"Yes I suppose that's true," I agreed, leaning my head down to her once more, but before my head was able to make contact with hers she pulled herself away from my arms and jogged up the stairs to the castle. I looked at her as she put her hands on her hips and stood patiently waiting for me at the foot of the Grand Doors. She let out a long, exaggerated sigh, and jutted her hip out to one side, only adding onto my desire and longing for her. _She was so unbelievably sexy and breathtaking,_ I thought to myself,_ even covered from head to toe in thickly caked on mud…_

"I am going to go take a shower," she told me as I made my way to her. "There's no way I am going into the Great Hall for dinner looking – or smelling, for that matter – like this." Her face was all but dried clean of the mud, and her lips were so pink, so full, so _tender_ looking… just begging…

"Wait," I told her as she turned towards the Grand Doors and took her hand into mine. She looked up at me expectantly, patiently waiting for me to go on. I took a moment to just drink her in. "When I first got down to the mud-pit," I decided to call it, "you said my name, and that you hadn't been so happy to see anyone in your whole life…?"

She smiled and looked down, gently pulling her hand from mine. "Oh, yes, well… you really have no idea how long I was down there. There were more than a few times my mind was able to thoroughly convince me the world had ended, and the last remaining survivors were myself, Ron and Hagrid. I thought we were looking for the cure to save the world, and then I saw you, and remembered we were just at Hagrid's, looking for the Vengeance Stone. Seeing you made me remember there was still life outside the mud."

"I'm your savoir then?" I wondered, subtly taking a step towards her.

Her smile widened. "Well, I wouldn't go that far," she chuckled, a curious look on her face. "But yeah, you did get there at the right moment, little brother."

"Hey!" I said teasingly, putting my hands around her waist and pinching softly. She began to wriggle and squirm as a series of girlish giggles filled my ears. "I may be younger," I told her, backing her up to the side of the castle and pinning her there, still tickling her gently, "but I am taller than you are, and not even a year younger than you. Barely, at that." I added, leaning my head in towards hers.

"Draco," she gasped, pressing her hands against my chest and gathering small fistfuls of my shirt. "Please… stop… please… I can't… breathe…!" I slowly pulled my hands away from her sides, and watched as she steadied herself against the wall, her hands still against my chest, and tried to regulate her breathing. "Thank you," she gasped.

"You're so beautiful," I told her, running my hand over her hair and down the side of her face.

"What?" her voice was almost all the way back to normal as she looked up at me, "Draco…" she was unable to get another word in as I quickly placed my hands on opposite sides of her face and leaned my lips towards hers, kissing her deeply.

TBC


	18. The Test

**Inside**

Chapter Seventeen: The Test

**Harry's POV**

I sat on the side of my bed with my hands balled tightly in my lap, looking over at my desk. A picture of myself, Ron and Hermione from second year looked back at me; our happy faces smiling back at me, and filling me with that much more bitterness and guilt. What Narcissa Malfoy had told me, told Hermione… it just couldn't be true. It couldn't!

A storm had been raging inside of me since that night; and why had Draco been so fast to believe her? And Hermione? Why had they been so able to overlook logic and jump right to the first ludicrous thing they were told?

"_You don't really know him though, Harry," _I could hear Hermione's voice playing inside my ears. "_Your Dad, _our_ Dad… you never really knew him. You were a baby when he died, Harry. I know you've never been one to listen to anything negative when it came to him… But think, Harry," _her voice went on. _"You never listen to anything negative… there has never been anything but negative! _

"_We are all fast to protect our parent's when people make judgments on them, especially bad ones… But Harry, you _never_ knew him." _Just as quickly as her voice had started, it ended. The things she was saying; the things I was hearing her say… she had never said any of it. I knew, just as well as I knew I was being irrational with everything lately, that her words were just my own thoughts, protecting me by using the sound of her voice. Hermione. The logical one. The smart one. The brain of the three of us.

How long had she known? When had she first been told about all of this? I wondered, letting out a breath of air and leaning back on my bed. Could it have been at the start of the year? It easily could have… was. Hermione told us all of this, after weeks, months of acting out of character… She told us all of this, and we believed her then. _I_ believed her then. I believed her just as easily with everything else I believed her with. I never questioned her or doubted what she was saying. I never had reason to; in all the time I knew her she was always so honest and logical, always so reasonable with everything.

Was that why she was acting so out of character? So not Hermione? Because she was trying to find enough evidence herself to believe what Narcissa told her? At first it was like I barely knew her at all, like we were never even friends in the first place… the weeks went by and she slowly because more and more herself; she was less secretive, more open to talk…

"I never did know him," I said aloud, looking over at the picture of my Mum and Dad dancing in the falling Autumn leaves, smiling at me; at each other. My Dad loved my Mum, that much was clear about them always… But did that mean that he would remain totally faithful while under the influence of alcohol? In is shown throughout history and books and things you read about in newspapers or read in magazine articles all the time that alcohol can make you do stupid things. It changes you, it makes you do things and say things that you wouldn't in a million years – or more – say or do.

I sat back up and brought my forehead down to my hands and let out a long, exaggerated groan. Was it really that I didn't want to believe what I was told, or was it that my Father and Mother were the only things I had since childhood I could hold onto? Was it that them dying when I was so young left open the option for me to make them whoever I wanted them to be? I didn't have memories or time with them to make and collect truth and fact… All I had to go on were pictures and things other people told me: the rest was fiction, fantasy. In my mind, I could make them be whoever I wanted them to be, I could make them be the kind of people they may have never truly been, the kind of people I wanted them to be.

In my minds' eye I could see everything so clearly - everything I had created - as if it were actual memory. I could see myself lazing about on the couch, my shoes propped up and Mum asking be to take my dirty shoes off her furniture. I would smile and let out a laugh and do nothing, and Dad would come in and tell me to listen to my Mother. He would cross the room, giving me a stern, playful eye, and walk over and wrap Mum into his arms and give her a long kiss, and ask what she was preparing for dinner. She would smile and laugh and tell him he would find out soon enough, and I would continue to look over at them, smiling at the sight of them so happy… so together… so in love…

At Christmas we would invite Hermione's and Ron's family over and have a huge celebration; Sirius would be there. We'd go out back and play a game of Quidditch as Mum, Molly, Ginny and Hermione and her Mum worked together in the kitchen cooking the big holiday feast, smiling and laughing together. We would be called back inside and complain that the game was almost finished – though we knew it wasn't, we'd just want to play longer – and they'd threaten if we wanted to eat to get our frozen behinds in the house. We would, as we always did each year, and end up being thankful they brought us in when they did, and we'd laugh and talk and smile as we ate Christmas dinner together. Then with expanded bellies and smiling faces, we'd retire into the living room and open up our gifts together…

Next morning we'd all wake up to find the house a mess; dirty dishes and gift wrap and trash all over the place. Hermione, Ron and I would wake early to surprise the adults with a clean house, and just end up stuffing ourselves with food from the night before, leaving an even bigger mess than what was already there. Mum would come into my room, see the three of us lazing about and watching muggle TV, roll her eyes and sigh, "Children…" We'd all shout back, "We're not children!", and she'd shake her head and walk down the stairs, pretending not to have heard it, as she always did…

But she didn't. She never did, there was no '_as she always did'_, because she had been dead for the past sixteen years. None of that ever happened, nor would it ever. She was dead, and Dad was dead, and Sirius were dead… dead and gone and never coming back. All of the "memories" I had created were just that: created, invented, and envisioned. The only place they ever lived were inside of me, and they weren't ever going to live outside of my mind. The only place they ever were was inside of me, and no amount of lying to myself or saying it out loud or pretending would make it anymore real than that… Real, they weren't even that. The only thing that made them real was the fact that I never stopped holding onto what I so desperately clung to: and that was lies and fantasy.

Wiping a loose tear from my eye I pulled my head away from my hands and looked back at my desk: the DNA test sitting silently, waiting to be opened. The strand of Hermione's hair I found on my jacket the night I attacked her and Ron laid out gently beside it. My own not far from hers.

I inhaled a deep breath of air and closed my eyes: doing this wouldn't change anything, I had to tell myself. What would it change? would I magically find out Hermione is my sister, run to my Dad and demand to have some answers? No, I couldn't, he was dead… and if he weren't, even then I don't think I'd be able to confront him about it. Who was to even say he knew about it? Remembered it? Alcohol was not only personality changing, but, as I heard, had a huge impact on memory. Maybe he did do it, and just didn't remember doing it… then it wasn't really his fault…

"NO!" I bellowed aloud, shooting up to my feet, "Stop defending him!" I forced myself to say, to think… to believe. _If I do this,_ I thought, _nothing changes. Hermione would have been told the truth, Draco and her wouldn't have believed a lie, and Narcissa would finally be at peace and have her daughter back. My parent's are dead: nothing for me changes, regardless of the outcome of the results. If I do this… my mind can finally rest, and I can go about my life with no more pretends: just the truth. _

Wiping my sweaty palms across my jeans I pulled my chair out from my desk and sat down. "If you do this," I told myself aloud, "No more lies. No more pretending, and no more fantasizing. I can't keep defining myself by the one thing I don't have… When it is done, regardless of what the outcome is, I will send a letter to Hermione and Ron and beg their forgiveness… no matter what, I will let this go…"

I reached my hand forward and grabbed the box.

TBC


	19. Brothers, Sisters and Teachers

**Inside**

Chapter Eighteen: Brothers, Sisters and Teachers

**Hermione's POV**

I tried to back away, but found I was already pinned up against the side of the castle. Draco stood there, face leaned in towards mine, looking at me. His eyes darted between my eyes and lips. I didn't say anything – I couldn't say anything. I was in too much shock and disgust to say anything, let alone remember how to use my feet, much less my vocal cords. My brother had called me beautiful, then _kissed_ me. On the _mouth_.

"Hermione?" he asked in a barely audible voice, and then, to my horror and utter disgust, he leaned in _again!_

"NO!" I forced from my lungs, shoving with all of my strength against him. I was barely able to see as he tumbled backwards, nearly falling down the steps, as I turned and opened the door as quickly as I could and _ran_.

_Run! _I told myself, _just keep running! _I passed the open doors to the Great Hall and heard the meaningless chatter and laughter of the occupants inside, enjoying their meal and social time. I on the other hand was running – covered in smelly dried mud, nonetheless - for my sanity from my incestuous driven brother…

I heard him call my name as I pounded my way up the third flight of stairs and took off down the hall at top speed. I hardly knew were I was, and knew even less where I was going, but knew I had to get there – wherever _there_ was – fast.

"Hermione!"

_Faster…_

I turned my head to see if he was coming, and at the base of my line-of-sight I could just make out his platinum blond hair bobbing up the third case of stairs I had just come from. He held his hand on the edge of the railing and looked above him, calling my name, and I felt a single moment of relief, and could almost go so far as to call it victory… until he looked in my direction and our eyes met. "Hermione!" he called, kicking himself from the stairs and pounding his way towards me. "Wait!"

_In your dreams!_ I thought as I pushed myself further, passing a long row of polished knight's in their silver armor.

His voice was louder as he called my name a forth time, and I knew that meant either his pace was quickening or mine slowing. Either way, I knew I had to find a place to stop and hide, soon. Looking around at my bearings, I really realized I had absolutely no idea where I was, and that didn't help the fact that his voice was growing louder with each call. He was getting close, too close, and I needed to dart into one of these doors.

Choosing the closest door on my left I found myself quickly surrounded by vile upon vial upon jar of liquids, potions and essences. The room was small and dim and had nothing but shelves of the stuff; no walls to be seen. As I focused my eyes I realized where I had ended up: in Severus's private store. I had never been there before, but he had told me about it, and by description alone I was sure – positive – that is where I was. I closed my eyes and hugged my arms around myself, dropping to one of the corners on the floor and comforting myself by knowing I was in a place that was his.

I listened quietly to the sound of his passing feet, and heard him say my name again. Only this time his voice was much softer, like a question rather than a demand, and I knew that meant he knew I had stopped running. _Damn!_ I thought, _how close was he?_

I heard as door after door was opened and then closed, hearing my name called each time. The doors started further away, and I hoped it would end that way and I would hear him disappear down the hall… but as I focused my ears I realized he was getting closer and closer.

I closed my eyes and bent my head forward to rest it on my knees. _Maybe,_ I thought, _if I just stay here on the floor he won't even notice me. He'll just do a quick glance around and go on to the next set of doors… _

The handle to my hiding place turned, and my breath caught in my throat. I listened blindly to the sound of the door opening; he did not call my name. Hopeful, I just hugged my knees against me tighter and wished and hoped he would leave. The sound of the door closing came next, but I did not hear his feet cross away from the door. Shifting, the crinkle of clothes… _he had found me._

I slowly lifted my head, opening my eyes, and saw him before me on the ground, propped up on his knees and looking over at me. A sad expression was on his face as he whispered my name, and reached a hand out to me. "I didn't mean to-"

"Kiss me?" I asked, hugging my legs tighter still.

"Scare you," he said, dropping his hand to his lap.

"You didn't," I told him.

"Then you'd you run?" he asked, trying a subtle attempt to scoot closer to me. "Why'd you ignore me when I called your name?" he asked. "And why are you in here, looking as if I tried to butcher you to death?"

"I was just kissed on the mouth by my brother," I told him bluntly. "I think anyone in my position would have done the same. Well," I added. "That or hex you, but, seeing as you're my brother and I still care about you, chose the first and less unpleasant of the two."

He took a moment and looked down at his lap. "One might argue that," he told me softly. "Having you run away from me like that was just as bad, if not worse than being hexed. At least if you'd hexed me it would have been you doing it."

"Draco," I began, dropping my arms from my legs and letting them fall to the side. "I'm your sister, your-"

"I love you," he cut me off. "I love you, I'm sorry… I know I shouldn't, but I do.

"You're all I think about, you're all I dream about when I am able to sleep. To be in the same room as you, to be next to you and not be able to touch you, or hold you, or kiss you… I can't even explain what kind of pain that is."

"Draco, stop," I begged him. "Please… I can't hear this."

"But you have to," he told me, raising his voice a bit and appearing at the base of my feet. He took my face into his hands and looked me deep in the eyes. "I _love_ you, Hermione. I love you more than the stars – I love you to the moon and back again. I love you to-"

"Stop!" I shouted, escaping his grasp. "Draco, I'm your _sister._ You're my _brother_. We've the same blood; the same Mother."

"I don't care," he shook his head. "Hermione, _I don't care._ It doesn't matter to me, I mean honestly, not that many people know, and the one's who do know won't ever have to know about us-"

"There is no _us_," I stopped him. "Draco, _there is no_ _us_. Not in the way you are asking there be. I am your sister, and you are my brother. The only _us_ there is is that of siblings, nothing more. And saying _it doesn't matter_… No, it really kind of does, Draco. We are _related!_

"What you are asking, what you are saying, it can never be! It never could be, and I would never want it to be! I love you, Draco, but as my brother, and nothing more. A friend, a companion… a shoulder to cry on once in a while… But nothing more.

"Draco," I said, sitting up straight. "Draco, listen to me: what you are feeling, it is _not_ real; it is _not_ right.

"You grew up an only child with nothing more than a big empty mansion, two parents and some servants. That's the life you've always had; the life you always known. And now you are presented with the fact that it is not as it has been, but that you have a sister, a new addition to the family. A newer, different sense of fulfillment in your life; your family.

"I don't doubt you love me Draco, in fact I know you do – but as your _sister_, not as this, as a _lover_ as you are so describing! I am someone new who has never been there before… I have heard of it before, it is a disease, Draco. As much as it isn't talked about it is not uncommon to be heard of, in half siblings. Siblings such as ourselves.

"They go their whole life not knowing they exist, and then, one day they meet and its like oh, there you are… But it isn't right, Draco. That feeling you get when you are with me, it is fulfillment in _family_, and _love of family_, not in lust or attraction or desire! Draco!" I added as he stood up and looked down at me. "Draco, please, listen to reason, listen to-"

"So you don't believe me, then," he nodded, looking around at the vials surrounding us. "You think I'm just sick and need some stern talking to and reasoning, is that it, then?"

"Yes, Draco," I breathed, "Yes, that is exactly what I am saying. Just hear what you are saying, look at me, your _sister_, and tell me what you are saying is normal."

Taking a vial into his hand he began pulling the cork out.

"Draco, what are you-"

"Truth potion," he cut me off. "If it's what it takes to make you believe me. I am not sick, Hermione. I do not have a disease, and I do not need to listen to reason.

"I am _in love with you_, Hermione, and no amount of talking or _reasoning_ is going to change that." Before I had a chance to stand and take the vial from him, he had downed the entire thing. "Go on then," he said, dropping the vial to the ground and shattering it. "Ask me anything, Darling."

"Don't call me that," I told him, looking up at him. "I'm your sister…"

"That you are," he nodded, the overdose of the potion clearly already kicked in. "And beautiful at that. Smart, intelligent, breathtaking, witty, _sexy_," his hand was stroking the side of my face, and I slapped it away and backed up.

"Stop that!" I told him, burrowing myself into the corner again. I stood with my face towards the potions and gripped tightly onto the edge of one of the shelves and closed my eyes.

"I love you," he told me, and I felt his body press against mine. He wrapped his hands around my shoulders and I shuddered, and threw up a bit in my mouth. "This…" he said, leaning his forehead against the back of my head and inhaling a deep breath. "This is all I've ever wanted; to be able to hold you like this, to-"

"Get off!" I demanded and shoved my back against him. I turned around to face him and crossed my arms over my chest – it was all I could do stop myself slapping him. "You're not allowed to touch me!" I told him. "You're not allowed to say you love me in anymore of a way than a brother to a sister – there is only one person who is allowed to think the things about me you're saying, and you are _not _him! You could never be him, ever! You're my brother, Draco! I am your _SISTER!_"

"Him?" he choked. "You mean, you're…?"

"Yes!" I shouted at him. "Yes, Draco, I am _in love with someone!_ And he is _not _you! He could never be you! You are my brother, my blood and family and kin and relative! You're not allowed to say you love me. You're not allowed to call me beautiful or kiss me or touch me or think whatever it is you think about me which I would like to go to the grave not knowing!

"Draco, you _must_ stop this madness!" I demanded, pounding the sides of my fists against his chest. "Draco, we have the same Mum!"

"But not the same Dad," he pointed out. "Meaning, we're only half related, half blood, and therefore only half as inclined to call each other siblings."

"But we _are_," I told him. "Draco, half or not, it's still there. And, half or not, even if you weren't my brother – which you are, Draco – I could never be with you because one you hated me and wished me dead before you knew we were related, and two, because I am already in love with someone else."

"I don't believe that," he told me. "You can keep saying it, but where is the mystery man, Hermione? As far as I can tell you're still as single as ever.

"You're single, Hermione," He said, stepping closer towards me. "You're single, I'm single… Don't you understand how easy it would be for us to be together? There are only a handful of people who know, and we both know who they are, it would be so easy, Hermione! We could be together and only have to act like we weren't around the people who know we're related!"

"But we know, Draco," I told him. "Draco, please… don't make me say it…"

"Say what?" he wondered.

"Draco… I'm not."

"Not…?"

"Not single…"

"Yes you are," he said, so self-assured. "You are single, Hermione. Just like me."

"Draco-" he cut me off, placing his finger across my lips.

"You can lie to yourself all you want, Hermione, but I know the truth just as well as you – and I can't lie!" he laughed. "Hermione, I've never seen you kiss anyone. I've never seen you hold someone's hand or swoon over anyone. I've never seen you snogging or anything two people do when they're in love.

"The only person I know who's hand you've held is mine. The only person who I've seen hold you is me. The only person who I've known to kiss you is _me. _It is me, Hermione, I am the one you are talking about – I have to be! There is _no one else_!

"And you can't claw yourself out of this one claiming it is Weasley, either, I have seen him and that Lavender girl – I think that's her name – around, and if you ask me, or anyone for that matter, those two are just about as in love with each other as I am you." _Ron and Lavender, hm, I wonder why he hadn't told me? _The thought of Ron finding someone put a smile on my face, and I realized my mistake as Draco looked down at me, smiling with equal happiness. He went to brush his hand over my hair, but I dodged it.

"You can fight this all you want, Hermione," he told me. "I tried to, but in the end just let my feelings win. Eventually you will too."

"You're my brother, Draco, and I will never see you as anything more or less than that. And as my brother I trust you to keep all of my secrets close to your heart, and not betray me."

"Never," he told me, shaking his head enthusiastically. "I could never _betray_ you, Hermione… I would never – could never hurt you like that."

"Good," I said, looking up at him. "Then you won't tell anyone about Severus and I."

"Sever-" he thought, "_Snape!?_"

My look was answer enough.

"That is, that is… whoa," he was laughing. "That is _rich!_ You've spent all this time trying to convince me loving you is wrong, when all along you've been in heat over a _teacher!? _Talk about _wrong_…"

"It isn't!" I told him. "Draco, he isn't _related_ to me!"

"But he is your _teacher_, Hermione! He is older than us! What life do you think you can have with him? You'll still be young and beautiful and he'll be mistaken for your grandfather!"

"I don't care," I told him.

"Hermione, you spent all this time trying to tell me my loving you is wrong. What I have, what I am… I can give you so much more than him! I am what is right for you, Hermione! I can give you happiness, and love, and protection! I can give you a lifetime of happiness and love, he'll be lucky to give you half!

"Hermione, please," he begged, taking another step towards me and taking my hands into his, "give me a chance to show you how much I love you. Give me a change to prove to you that I can be so much more than a brother; I can make you forget we are even related if you just let me. Let me love you, Hermione, let me give you what I want to give you – let me give you my love."

"And I want you to, Draco," I told him, nodding. "But as a _brother_, and _nothing_ more…"

"I love you," he whispered, stepping into me. I tried to back away, but found, like before, I was already pressed firmly against my back on the shelves. "I love you, Hermione… I love you, I love you, I love you more than I an possibly explain. More than you can possibly imagine, I can give you things you never could have even imagined – I can give you things _Severus_ would never even think of, never even imagine.

"We are the same age, Hermione," he told me, leaning into me. "We can grow old together, in time with each other. We can live a life of happiness and contentment and pure and utter bliss, only pretending we are siblings when the people who know are around."

"It _would be_ pretending Draco," I told him, looking up at his closely approaching face. "We _are_ siblings, Draco. We _are_ related… and what you are saying… It can't possibly be, because everything you are describing Severus has already given to me. He makes me happy, he makes me feel loved, and safe, and protected, and wanted. He makes me feel like I am the luckiest girl in the world by giving me everything I need; all I need is love. I don't need anything other than that… All I need – all I _want_ – is him, Draco. It's him, only him…"

"Hermione," his voice was hoarse, "_please_," he begged. "Please, let me show you…" he leaned his lips into mine, and I turned my head way quickly. "Please," he went on, and I felt his lips kiss along my temple and jaw bone.

"No!" I shouted, shoving him away from me. He crashed backwards into the shelves across from me and fell in a heap to the ground. There, he started sobbing. His shoulder shaking and head drooped towards the ground, he sobbed on and on.

"I'm sorry," he cried. "Hermione, I'm so sorry… I know it's not right, what I feel. But I can't help it," he told me, looking up at me with tears running down his cheeks. "I have tried, I have tried to stop, but I can't. I just _can't_…

"It's you, Hermione, you… you're the one I want, you're the only one I have ever felt this strongly about. You're the only one I have thought about kissing the way I do, holding, touching… I want you, Hermione… I want you more than I have ever wanted anyone or anything in all my life.

"So please… _please_…" he cried, sniffing his nose and looking over at me. "Please, I know we can never _be together_," his voice cracked. "But please… just this once… let me hold you… please…"

"Draco-"

"You said yourself siblings are there for each other; to cry on each others shoulders, to be friends…"

"Yes, I did…" I nodded.

"So… please… in case you haven't noticed I am kind of loosing my shit over here." I laughed softly, I had never heard him talk like that before. "Please Hermione… it's all I ask. I won't try to kiss you again, I promise."

"Draco, I don't think that-"

"Please, Hermione," he went on. "As your _brother_ I am asking for comfort… please, Hermione… Please… I need you… as your brother… I need my sister, I need to hold her and have her hold me as I cry my eyes out like a baby. _Please._"

Slowly, reluctantly, I dropped down to my knees and crawled over to him. He looked at me as I reached him, and he opened his arms to me. I looked at him, and saw him as he was asking me to: as a brother in need of his sister's love, and went into his arms.

"Shh," I told him as I stroked the back of his head and held him against me. His warm tears soaked my neck and collar. "It's alright, Draco," I whispered as he sobbed, holding me tighter and tighter against him. "It's alright… It'll be fine, we'll get through this together… shh… shh…"

"I'm so stupid!" he cried.

"Shh! Shh… You're not, Draco, you're not… I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere until you're alright… I promise."

"In that case I hope you didn't have any plans for the rest of your life," He sobbed, hugging me closer still.

"It doesn't matter," I told him, stroking his back. "You're my brother, my family, your more important than any of that."

"I love you," he sobbed. The sound of his voice told me how he meant it; that he was fighting to mean as my brother.

"I love you too, Draco," I told him as his sister, holding him close. "I love you too…"

"Please forgive me for what I did," he begged me. "I am so so sorry, Hermione! I am so sorry for being in love with you, Hermione! I am so sorry!"

"I do, Draco," I told him honestly. "I do forgive you." I knew my words were true, and I knew his words were genuine. I knew what he was saying was true; he couldn't lie. No matter how long it took, I would help him get through this, and over me and onto a girl who would be lucky enough to call herself my brother's girlfriend. "We'll get through this, okay?"

He nodded his head through his sobbing. "Okay," he cried. "Okay… Okay…"

* * *

I looked down to see I was still filthy and covered in mud as I stood outside Severus's door. "I don't even care," I sighed, defeated with what events the night had presented. I lifted my hand to knock but before my knuckles were able to make contact with the wood the door was thrust open and Severus was looking down at me. I smiled and threw myself against him, squeezing him against me as hard as I could.

"I see I was not the only one missing someone," he said as he cupped his hand on the back of my head and hugged me. "But, Darling," he added, pushing me gently away from him. "Why are you covered in dried mud?"

"Vengeance Stone," I told him. "It took hours, but, eventually I found the thing. Only took about eight hours." I told him, all proud of myself.

He smiled down at me and brought his lips to mine. "You always were top in your class," he said, looking down at me and hovering his just out of reach.

"Like that'll ever change," I said back, and lifted myself to my tip toes to kiss him. I let out a complaint as he raised himself with me, moving his lips further away. I raised myself further still, and he dodged me again. "Why-" he placed his finger over my lips to silence me as he looked down at me with an amused, loving look on his face.

He ran his hand over my cheek and head, brushing my hair softly with his fingers. He grabbed my hand and pulled me into his classroom, and I followed him up to his office and through the door which led to his Private Rooms. A place, until now, which I had never been.

"Sever-" he placed his finger over my lips and looked down at me. "What are you?-"

"Shh," he told me softly, and I watched as he walked around me and placed his hands on to my shoulders. Chills ran down my spine as he slid my robe away from my shoulders and dropped it to the floor in a dusty, dirty heap. I went to say his name again, but was silenced myself as I felt his lips against the nook of my neck. He kissed me softly, tenderly. I was trembling as he ran his hands to my front and laced his fingers with mine, keeping his lips pressed softy against my neck.

"I love you," he whispered as he gently pulled his hands away from mine.

"I love you," I whispered with my eyes closed. I opened them for a moment to look back at him, and found he was looking down at me, a tender expression in his eyes. "Severus…" I turned my head back to kiss him, reaching my hand back and cupping his neck into my hand.

He reached his hands down my sides and took the base of my shirt into his hands, pulling it up and over my head.

TBC


	20. Professor

**Inside**

Chapter Nineteen: Professor

**Hermione's POV**

'_Hermione,' _I began reading again, my heart hammering nervously in my chest. It had been five months since I had seen him, and today was the day.

'_I have spoken to both Professor Dumbledore and McGonagall, and both of them have agreed to let me visit the school for the last month. They say I still can't have my wand back or take classes, but have agreed to let me stay on with Hagrid and help him with the grounds. I have spoken to Arthur and Molly and the other Weasley's as well, and Ron and now you. I know, you're my sister and I should have written you with this first. But I guess it is because you are my sister that I wrote you last about this, you're the one who's opinion outshines the rest. I still can't begin to explain how sorry I am for what I did and for how I reacted… But going this long without seeing you or Ron, regardless of what happened, is torture. I know, it is nothing compared to what I did to you guys, but for what it's worth, I miss you… I miss you more than I ever imagined I could miss anyone. I miss you and Ron and Hogwarts… I even miss Snape, if you'll believe it. I miss everything about the magical world, my world, and I want nothing more than to come back and move on from the past. But I won't do that unless you write me back and tell me you want to see me. If you don't, I understand and will just see you next year, or maybe in the Summer at Ron's, if I'm lucky… Please write me back as soon as you decide weather or not you want to see me. For what it's worth, I love you and Ron and can not wait to see you. But will, if it is what you wish._

_Love from you ever sorry brother, _

_Harry'_

Of course I had written him back right away telling him yes, I wanted to see him, and that if he apologized again I would hex him. In the letter I wrote it was like old times again; like none of that bad stuff had ever happened and that he was just not here… Truth was, as much as I missed him and wanted to see him… I was incredibly nervous. I talked to Ron, and his feelings on the matter was the same. It was not that we lied about wanting to see him, of course we wanted to see him, more than anything in the world… We just didn't know how it would be. Would it be awkward? Would it be silent? Would it be like we were never even friends in the first place? These questions hovered over my head like a black cloud of impending doom and chaos. I could barley breath at times and on occasion forgot my bearings; all I had been able to think about for the past month, since I got the letter, was seeing him again. My friend and brother, he was going to be back, and I was a downright nervous wreck.

I inhaled a deep breath of air and folded the letter against my stomach and slid it into my pocket. I felt his arms wrap around me and enfold me, and smiled. He was the only thing that could calm me down these days, and really, that wasn't something to complain about. I ran my hands over his arms and hugged him hugging me.

The sound of feet pounding off in the other direction made me open my eyes, but when I looked there was no one to be seen. I shrugged it off and turned around to look up at Severus, who was smiling down at me. He ran his hand over my forehead and kissed me. "Are you alright?" he asked with concern, looking deeply into my eyes.

I nodded. "Yeah," I told him. "Yes, I am fine." I reached my lips up to his and kissed him. "Just thinking."

"I would be concerned if you weren't," he agreed, bringing his lips back down to mine. "You haven't seen him in five months… Are you sure you are ready?"

"Yes," I told him with a smile. "For a minute there I was questioning myself, but then I felt these strong arms wrap around me, and all my doubts flew out the window." I slid my hands up his back and feathered my fingers into the base of his hairline and kissed him deeply, stepping onto my tiptoes and drinking him in. He held his arms securely around me and pulled me closer to him, deepening the kiss as his tongue danced in synch with mine.

"_HERMIONE?!_" Came Harry's shocked voice.

"Harry?" I asked, pulling my lips from Severus's and turning around to see him standing there. "_Harry!"_ Realization washed over me as I realized Harry was not alone.

"_SEVERUS!_" McGonagall's voice shouted in time with mine.

"Professor McGonagall!" I shouted as Severus and I stepped away from each other. "Harry!" I added again, looking back and forth between the two of them.

"_MISS GRANGER!_" McGonagall barked.

"Harry!" I yelled, realizing what had happened. I had heard feet pounding away just as Severus was wrapping his arms around me. Harry saw… surly he didn't think…?

"Minerva," Severus nodded.

"Severus!" she shouted breathlessly. "What in the name of _Merlin_ is going on here!?

"I haven't seen Harry for as long as all of us, and he comes running to my office, shouting like a _crazy_ person that Professor Snape was attacking Miss Granger! And now, as I see, _clearly_ he was _mistaken_!"

"He was," Severus agreed, nodding his head.

"Hermione!?" Harry shouted again, looking at me with wide, confused eyes.

"Harry…" I began slowly.

"I know, right? Missed you too…" he said while nodding his head. "You know, this actually isn't that surprising." We all looked at him with wide, mute eyes. "What?" he asked. "Seriously, I have seen stranger…"

* * *

"Hermione," Harry said again, "Hermione… _Hermione!_" he wrapped his hands around my wrists and held me in my place, preventing me from pacing. "Would you please stop that?"

"I- _How could you, Harry?_" I asked him, pulling my arms away from him and crossing them over my chest. I looked back to the ground and continued my pacing. "They've been in there for _hours_."

"First off," he said, raising his finger to the air. "Why didn't you just tell me about you and Snape? That probably could have helped avoid this whole thing." I opened my mouth to protest, to yell at him for twisting it around on me, but he spoke before I had a chance to. "And secondly, don't you think your freaking out a bit much? They have literally been in there for no more than fifteen minutes."

"Oh…

"Why'd you go twisting it around?" I asked him, quickening my pace at the base of Dumbledore's private entrance to his office.

"Twisting it around, _what?_" he sounded thoroughly confused. "Hermione, I haven't twisted _anything_ around… I get back here, and the first thing I see is you looking nervous and Snape coming up behind you! What do you think I was supposed to think!? You've never told me, or given me so much as a _hint_ that the two of you were together. I mean, honestly Hermione, he isn't the first name that pops into my mind when I think of a eligible boyfriend for you."

"Who then?" I asked him, looking over at him as I paced back and forth.

"Ron?" He suggested. "Not him, not _Snape_."

"Ron? No, no… Ron's with Lavender. Besides, Severus and I have been together longer than that."

"_Lavender?_" He asked, baffled. "Lavender Brown?" I nodded. "Okay, honestly didn't see that one coming either… What else happened when I was away?"

"I almost buried Ron alive," I told him. "It was quite traumatizing for him, but not nearly as traumatizing as what happened to me after. Hagrid had to dig him out with a shovel, it took him nearly the whole night. Ron wouldn't speak to me for a week."

"And that traumatized you?" he asked. "Ron not talking to you?"

"No," I shook my head. "What happened after I almost buried him alive but before he was dug out by Hagrid."

"Which was?"

I shook my head. "Trust me Harry, that is not something you want to know nor is it a memory I want to go resurrecting."

"Then why'd you bring it up?" he asked.

"You asked what else you'd missed," I told him.

"But you won't tell me?"

"I just did," I told him. "Now Harry, if you please… my mind is kind of preoccupied at the moment."

"_I hadn't noticed…_"

"What?" I spat. "Oh, never mind!"

"Hermione," he said as he dodged in front of me to stop me pacing. "Hi! How are you?" He asked. "It is nice to see you, isn't the weather wonderful? Just look at it out there, so beautiful and Springy… Summer is just around the corner."

"Yes," I nodded, trying to step away from him, but he blocked me. "It is."

"Hermione!"

"What!?"

"You need to just breathe, take it in, hold it… and calm down for a minute."

"Harry!"

"_Hermione._"

"You're trying to distract me from a very serious issue!"

"Yeah, I really am," he agreed. "But so far I seem to be failing at that."

"Obviously!"

"Okay, okay, Hermione," he said, taking the sides of my face into his hands and looking into my eyes. "You need to calm down, alright? As your friend and brother, you need to trust me with what I am about to say: everything will be fine."

"But-"

"Everything will be fine, okay?" he asked me, dropping his hands. "You and Snape will both be fine."

"But-"

"Over the years how many tight situations have you, Ron and myself found ourselves in?" he asked. "And how many times have we been caught?"

"Harry, we don't-"

"How many?" He persisted.

"Less than a handful?" I suggested, and he nodded.

"Exactly, we've been here – _well, you and Ron, really_ – six years now. I think if ever we were going to seriously get our asses handed to us it would have happened by now, don't you?"

"I-" I stammered, "Harry, those times were different! McGonagall just walked in on Severus and I kissing! I think that tops the other times!"

He tilted his head to the side, "Well, you've got a point there…"

"Harry you're not-" I silenced myself as the sound of the revolving staircase filled my ears. I looked over at Harry, then back at the revolving golden eagle and watched as it twisted and twisted. My breath caught in my throat as Professor McGonagall and Dumbledore walked up to me.

"Miss Granger," McGonagall said, and I swallowed.

"Professor McGonagall," I nodded with my arms folded tightly across my chest.

"Miss Granger," Dumbledore said with a stern expression. I felt my face drain of blood. "How are you this afternoon?" he wondered, looking outside through one of the open windows. I remained silent, looking up at him nervously. "Yes, as I thought…

"You will receive your diploma of graduation with the rest of the seventh years at this years graduation ceremony, and then, if it isn't too much to ask… Our Professor Flitwick is leaving us this year to take care of some personal business, leaving an opening for Charms Teacher. I would like you to return next year and take over for him."

"I…" I was _speechless_. Was this really happening?

"I hear you're quite good at Charms?" He went on.

"Yes, Sir," I breathed.

"Wonderful," he smiled. "Now, I see no reason why you and Professor Snape can't keep up with your relationship, though discreetly, I may add."

I nodded. "Yes, Professor Dumbledore, of course, Sir."

"Splendid," he smiled, stepping away from me and turning towards Professor McGonagall. "A walk, Minerva? It is such a pleasant day out, and I feel like getting some fresh air. It has been weeks now since I took a leisurely stroll about the grounds." I watched in mute silence as the two descended down the hallway, and out of sight.

"Did that really just happen?" I asked after a moment, looking over at Harry with baffled eyes.

"I think it did," he smiled, looking just as bewildered – and excited – as I felt. "Congratulations!" he laughed, pulling me into his arms. "Hermione! Congratulations!"

"How is this even possible?" I asked as we parted. "No one in the history of Hogwarts has _ever_ graduated early before; not by an entire year!"

"You're just lucky I guess!" Harry beamed. "My lucky sister; Professor Granger, Charms Teacher at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry."

Now I was laughing. Pure, unfiltered joy soaring through me. I pulled Harry into my arms. "Oh, Harry!" I smiled. "At first I wanted to hex you! Now… _Oh_, Harry!"

I felt a light tap on my shoulder, and turned around to see Severus there, smiling down at me. I quickly pushed Harry off of me, hearing an offended '_Hey!_' I ignored him and jumped into Severus's arms; wrapping my legs around his waist and arms around his shoulders. I slammed my lips against his and kissed him again and again. "Is this possible?" I asked him, kissing him again. "Is this real?"

"Yes," he told me, kissing me and holding me fast to his body. "Hermione, you have more than _twice_ as many credits as a standard graduating seventh year – you are graduating to teach!" I let out a high pitched feminine squeal and hugged him tighter still, bringing my lips back to his. He was laughing through my kisses, but I just couldn't stop. I was graduating! I was going to come back next year as a _teacher! _And every year thereafter!Severus wasn't getting taken away; we weren't in trouble! We could be together! And not be secretive – save being discreet – anymore!

I kissed him again and again and again.

"Harry!" I heard Ron's voice bellow. "Harry, how long have you- _WHOA!_"

The sound of Lavender letting out a loud gasp came next, but I didn't care, I just kept kissing the man I loved. "They're not allowed to do that!" she cried. "Ron, Ron, they're not allowed to do that, are they?"

"I- uh, uh- I, uh…"

Harry laughed. "They are now," he told them. "Isn't that right, Professor Granger?"

I smiled through our kiss.

TBC

* * *

**Author's Note: **Stay tuned for the conclusion to 'Inside.' :)


	21. Epilogue: The Journey to Hogwarts

**Inside**

Epilogue: The Journey to Hogwarts

**Hermione's POV**

"Professor Granger," Severus whispered in my ear, coming up behind me and wrapping his arms around my stomach and pulling me against his chest. The train had not yet started on its way to Hogwarts and I stood looking out the window, seeing it all through different eyes.

I smiled and closed my eyes, hugging his arms over me. "Professor Snape," I whispered back, leaning my head against his shoulder.

"Are you nervous?" he asked softly, and I opened my eyes and looked back at him.

"No," I told him, shaking my head. "I'm not."

"It will be your first year teaching," he reminded me, and I twisted around in his arms to face him. "I remember my first year, I was just short of a wreck."

I shook my head. "No," I told him, running my hand over his head. "I'm not. I have you, and as long as I have you I can do anything – wreck free and easily." He smiled down at me and leaned his lips to my forehead. I closed my eyes and leaned into his touch, sighing softly at the feeling. "I love you," I whispered, looking up at him.

"And I you," he told me, bending down and pressing his lips against mine. We kissed for long moments, holding each other and drinking each other in.

As he pulled his lips away from mine he slid his arms away from me; taking my hand into his and pulling me over to sit. I curled up beside him as he wrapped his arm around my shoulders, and I nuzzled my head into his shoulder. Our hands still clasped, he leaned his face into mine and kissed me again.

The familiar sound of the train whistling filled my ears, and I felt as the train slowly inched forward, picking up speed as it pulled forward. Thinking I was being subtle, the nervousness I had been concealing over the past few months kicked in, and I felt my body tense. Severus leaned his head down and rested it against mine and ran his thumb across the top of my hand. I relaxed in the silence that came with holding each other, and before I knew it I had all but forgotten about my nerves.

"Here we go," I sighed, and curled my fingers against his. He pulled his head away from mine and looked down at me as I looked out the window – the blur of green passing by quickly. I looked up at him, and smiled.

"I don't think your students will give you too much trouble," he told me, running his hand through my hair. I looked at him questioningly, and he went on. "You have Professor Snape wrapped around your little finger, Professor Granger, and I don't think that is any small degree of a secret."

"Huh," I mused. "And here I have gotten it wrong this whole time… I thought Professor Snape had Professor Granger wrapped around his little finger. I guess I can live in ignorance, though." Smiling, I leaned my lips up to kiss him.

"Found them!" Harry's voice hollered, forcing me to pull my lips back before they even had a chance to brush against Severus's. "Think just because you're a teacher now means you get to dodge your old school-day pals?" he asked, pulling Ginny in by the hand as he tossed a small suitcase on the shelf above the seats. "Come on guys! I've found them!" he hollered back, sticking his head out the door.

"About bloody time!" Ron said as he and Lavender shuffled their way into the compartment. "Hey, do you guys think the snack trolley will be out soon? I'm starved."

"Ronald, you just ate three sandwiches and two banana muffins," Ginny told him while shaking her head and taking a seat beside Harry, across from Severus and I. "Not to mention the two bowls of oatmeal this morning, and the bowl of fruit and left over soup from last night. And the rest of the crackers."

"Well yeah," Ron agreed, pulling Lavender onto his lap. "When you put it like that you make it sound like a bad thing."

"I'm not saying it's a bad thing," Ginny told him. "I'm only saying you're a pig," she said it so seriously, so matter-of-factly that the lot of us, Ron included, couldn't help but burst into laughter. Even Severus was laughing.

"Better get used to this, Severus. As long as you've got Hermione it's a package deal," Harry told him. "You get her, you get all of us."

I smiled and looked up at Severus, I alone could recognize the mischievous look in his eyes. "That goes both ways, Mister Potter," he told him, and Harry swallowed and leaned back in his seat. It took all I had to not start laughing. "Ten points from Gryffindor if you call me anything but Professor Snape, or sir, from now on."

"Yes sir," Harry nodded, and looked over at me. "He's… he's not always like this, is he, Hermione?"

"Always," I told him, and looked up at Severus and kissed him. "And that's _Professor _Granger, to you, young man."

He let out a laugh. "Yeah, good one, Hermione."

"No?" I asked him. "Then perhaps a detention will be better served to convince you of my seriousness."

"Oh, no…" Ron groaned, and Harry's face paled.

"Guys!" I laughed. "I am only joking!" the two breathed a sigh of relief, and Ginny and Lavender, smiling and shaking their heads in the boys ignorance, looked at me knowingly.

"You, Professor Granger," Severus said, running his hand down the length of my face. "Are going to have _far_ too much fun with this."

"Absolutely," I nodded, and pulled my lips up to his.

THE END


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